I guess it's an intimacy question...my boyfriend & I live together and have a great sex life. Sometimes we watch porn movies (some hard, some soft) all depends on the mood. Well last night we were watching one and I was asking him specific questions like do you like that, does that turn you on, and he kept telling me to stop asking him questions. I told him I was just trying to see what else he liked, then I asked him one more question and he said, don't ask me any more questions about this, either watch it or turn it off. That upset me so I turned it off and went to sleep. He told me goodnight but I was mad and didn't say anything, he still snuggled with me all night but I just don't get why he didn't want to discuss this. Any ideas??
2006-11-03 00:52:41 · 25 answers · asked by A. T. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
!. He wanted to just watch the movie in peace. (although some action would have been better than just watching)
2. He is not comfortable with talking openly. (I can talk to my boyfriend and my best friend easily about sex and such over im, but I tend to avoid the subject in person)
3. He wants to keep his fantasies private. (you can just experiment without trying to learn beforehand, or leave it alone)
Good luck!
2006-11-03 01:24:41 · answer #1 · answered by JJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, sounds like he's a little shy about that huh? Ya know, sometimes people watch porn even though they may have been taught that it's wrong! Maybe if he feels in the back of his mind, that he really shouldn't be watching it, that makes him even more uncomfortable about openly discussing it! Instead of asking him, just imitate what's going on in the flic, and his physical reactions should tell you what you want to know. I wouldn't make a big deal of it though, since you already said you have a great sex life. Ya sure don't wanna mess that up do ya?
2006-11-03 09:00:30 · answer #2 · answered by rebecca_sld 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess the main purpose of watching is to enhance the mood to help things unfold , but discussing details is getting clinical which is bound to undo the effect and can lead to a put off. The idea is to go about what comes naturally and discover things at your own pace.
2006-11-03 09:03:05 · answer #3 · answered by dwarak1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men are visual creatures. I think if ruins it for him if you are making the fantasy practical. I don't think they view porn as reality. You should probably make a mental note of the things you want to ask about and ask at another time, like after you have sex and are just laying there talking (assuming you do that, it is an intimate time).
Just enjoy the movie together and good for you for being able to watch it together. Most women can't because of hang-ups.
2006-11-03 08:57:03 · answer #4 · answered by Hopey 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He's an idiot. You are the perfect girl. If I had an opportunity like that where you are asking me what I want while watching porn with you...I'd be like..."Yeah Yeah Yeah..that one...and that one too! Do you want to do that one?! Wanna try that now." I'd rather have sex than watching porn. Porn is a nice teaser, but c'on we want the action. He's a wuz.
2006-11-03 08:56:37 · answer #5 · answered by Clock Watcher 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't take this personal at all. This has nothing to do with you and EVERYTHING to do with the movie. I don't htink it has anything to do with embarrassment or such, I just think he was watching the movie and didn't want to be bothered with questions during obviously good parts of the movie. I'm sure you've been iritated before.
I'm just saying...
2006-11-03 09:21:43 · answer #6 · answered by rogerdbnc 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's odd he didn't want to discuss... I've been in the same situation and was thrilled to open a conversation about things we both wanted but maybe hadn't found a way to articulate... then again, perhaps his usual habit is just to watch silently?
2006-11-03 08:55:59 · answer #7 · answered by mr_mumbles_nyc 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ya, i would be curious too. Maybe he is embarrassed to answer the question?
If you have a good relationship, i don't see why he can't at least tell you why he doesn't want to answer the question. I would ask him later in a different setting
2006-11-03 08:58:14 · answer #8 · answered by tonka 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
have you ever talk to him like that before.. my question does he now how to talk to you sexily and Bing open .. you see some men have a hard time taking about sex because they do not no how to show there feeling about it . sex for a man is a hard kind of talk and he might not wont to talk that way to you.. so if you can handle it ask him it OK to talk like that.. Good Luck..
2006-11-03 09:03:19 · answer #9 · answered by celticdragon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like there is one more door for him to open..He is not hiding anything but I think that he is probably not ready to be that open.He may feel slightly insecure or scared to fully open up to you on a super private matter. Hopefully in time he will come to completely trust and confide totally in you..This is not unusual for men.We do not like to feel vulnerable and keeping a little of ourselves to ourselves makes us feel less vulnerable...in time he should come out of his shell as the relationship grows.
2006-11-03 08:58:37 · answer #10 · answered by cyborg_2099 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋