Do you sometimes wish?

Question

I know a lot of you will find this horrible,but do you sometimes wish you didn't have children?I have 3 dificult kids,and i just get so stressed out.All i want to do is sit and talk with my husband,and the kids have to be right there climbing on me.I swear my 1 yr old has a radar,because any time we touch eachother she starts crying.Does anyone else ever feel this way?

Answer 1

i do all the time but i always rember that there will be problems with them just like my lil girl i have right now she almost 3 now and she growing up next day she goin to be 15 and wanting to go on date's see the mom died haveing her and t just so.. hard to come by that and just rember that she or he is your child and will always love you no matter what happens!!!!!

Answer 2

You don't sound horrible at all. I only have one 7 month old and I feel that way at times (especially the radar thing!). I think what you need is to find a reliable person to take on the three children at least one night a week and you and your husband spend some time together just the two of you. Don't even worry about the kids, just drop them with someone you know you can trust and rely on. But I know what you are saying. It'll get better as they get older and more independent. Take care and God bless.

Answer 3

Its perfectly normal, in my opinion, to feel that way. I would suggest setting boundaries with the kids though - as to when you and your husband get 15 minutes alone. The children will be difficult if they are not given set boundaries. It may take awhile, and the 1 year old may not be quite ready for it... but for the older - why not give them a reward if - when you tell them "daddy & I need 15 minutes. You have to play quietly and nicely for 15 minutes.". Maybe, have a reward jar for each of them...and when they obey and they let you have your time, put a penny in it. For every 10 pennies they collect, they get a prize - whether its a piece of candy, or a pack of baseball cards - an extra story at bed time...something like that. That may help - and after they start getting the hang of it and obeying the 15 minutes, you may find it easier to increase that time to 20 minutes and a half an hour.

As for the 1 year old....the child may just have to be put into her crib or a bouncy seat if you have one, and simply say "mommy and Daddy have to talk now." Ignore her when she cries - within a weeks time she'll get used to it and stop crying.

At least, that has been my experience. I hope it helps you somewhat. Don't expect it to change over night - it may take a week or two, but in the long run it'll work and you'll be happier for it. Also, don't teeter - be consistent!!

Answer 4

Talk to someone outside your home like a pastor, another mom, or a counselor.
Go out one night a week or once every two weeks. let your husband do the same. The two of you should go out together at least as often.
My mom had 3 wild boys, but also had a system. She got together with other moms in da hood and arranged babysitting days. No money was exchanged, just you watch mine today and I'll watch yours tomorrow.
Finally, if none of these work, contact your local social services office and explain your situation and they will get some help out to you.
Just remember, the kids aren't being obnoxious on purpose, they really just want your attention because they love you.
My favorite quote from a movie - "Mother is the name of God on the lips of a child." Take good care of yourself and your kids, you can't do one without the other.

Answer 5

Accually yes,I have 3 kids too.6,5 and 2.Not married but boyfriend is daddy.I just feel so over whelmed and the fact that I'am only just turned 25 so I feel like I'm totally missing out on life.My man don't help at all with the kids,he does make good money but it seems like that doesn't even matter.My kids follow me everywhere,even in the bathroom and it's like leave me alone.I can't even take a shower without the door wide open or my baby boy starts screaming and freaking out.Any way so much to say,so little space to say it.Maybe we should talk more.Email me if you need to chat when the kids are attacking you.LOL![e-mail].

Answer 6

I would say every parent has felt the same way from time-to-time. Being a parent isn't easy and we can easily become overwhelmed.

You need a break. Do you have a child care center close by or someone who can come and sit with the children for a couple of hours? Take some time for just you and your husband and do it on a regular basis.

Answer 7

Dont worry your not a terrible mother or anything like that. I think anyone who has kids knows that some days are just way more stressed out than others and everyone at some point will wish they didnt have kids. Its ok its just stress. Sounds like you need i break from them. Maybe you and your husband need some private time alone...this is hard i know i have 3 myself 2 of which have ADHD. They drive me nuts on a daily basis. Good Luck...

Answer 8

Yes, I have 16 and 13 year old girls. They drive me up the wall. I love them dearly!
Now that they are older, they have informed ME that I have no social life! I remind them that I gave it up for them.
It just sounds like you and your husband need a "Kidvation"(my version of 1 evening and 1 half of a day alone with your husband. A mini vacation.) That time is extremely energizing.
I do that maybe once every six months, and believe it or not, I even really begin to miss them.

Answer 9

Yea I felt that way too I had my baby really young at 16 and when he was in my belly I was soo happy till I had him and saw what it was to have a baby. I use to regret it so much and I would say to my self I wish I never had him. I didnt really mean it but out of anger sometime. But I understand you and I could imagine with three kids it must be even worse. All I can tell you is hang in there and do your best no one is perfect and those feelings you have are no wrong at all. Goodluck

Answer 10

Don't feel bad,We all go through it at some point in time.Usually when they are screaming and destroying our favorite things. Although I would not say that I wish I had never had my kids.I love them very much and would not trade the little monsters for anything in the whole world.That being said I do wish I had a time machine so I could go back and visit for a while.

Answer 11

I never wish that I did not have children, although I sometimes wish I could get a break or a day to myself. All the things you just mentioned are just part of motherhood, I mean how many moms will say wow my kids are so well behavied, I have not heard any. My son hates when my hubby just hugs me, but to my son I am his. I understand that, I also enjoy it in a way (he is 19 months) in a few years he is not going to want to hug or kiss me in public.