I lost my virginity to the man i love, but why do i feel so depressed?

Question

Ok...I'm dating this guy named Ron for about a month now..and we are so in love with eachother. I gave my promise to God that i wouldn't have sex until i'm married but for some werid reason I felt so comfortable to the point that i thought i was ready to give myself to him. The strange thing is after doing an hour of nothing but four-play and then having him go inside me..only made me more nervous and exhausted..I mean when we four-play my body is completely aroused and the energy and connection between us is incredible but right when i thought i was ready to make love to him...every bone in my body started to quiver and shake rapidly. I felt at that moment I wasn't ready..but he had already but the condom on..so I went through with it...After we finished about 10minutes of sexual intercourse...I just stood there shocked and depressed...It wasn't the way I invisioned it to be..Was i not ready? Or was it the feeling of breaking the promise i made with God?. I don't know??

Answer 1

You feel that way because you went back on your word.

Answer 2

Just because you're in love doesn't mean you should necessarily be having sex. Plain and simple you weren't ready. I would suggest being very forward with him about how it made you feel afterwards and let him know that it just wasn't the right time. Otherwise he may be coming back for more and you don't need to submit yourself to further emotional punishment. Just don't fall into the trap of, "Oh wel, may as well run with it now." If you feel bad now you will feel worse the next time. Remember, we can't change our mistakes but we can learn from them. I would also suggest not playing too hard, that will just frustrate and confuse the both you. Find a better past time than teasing him and yourself, hun.

Answer 3

Your feelings, depression, sorrow and sadness are very clear indicators that you have chosen a very very wrong way to move ~ done a thing ~ which is wrong, immoral, in ethical and disrespect to a person's dignity and disbelief in nature. The thing or virtue of attribute you have lost, can not obtained again even if we spent any amout of money. It means that this attribute is the MOST MOST MOST valuable thing for a girl. But what to say the modern non ethical, irresponsive society that they are not even counting this (virginness) as an human asset or issue.
Beleive or not the society, culture, humanity is moving towrds its total destruction.
The feelings you have now is voice of your conscious ~ which means that your conscious is still alive ~ a very good thing.
What is done - cant be undone. I suggest that revive your promise (not to enter in sins) again
and be strict to that. If we anaylze the issues with open mind then this whole scanario of dating, gf, bf etc. is NOTHING except NONSENSE and is 100 percent against morality.

Answer 4

There is nothing like guilt to upset the first time. MAYBE it is the promises once made in faith, and now only a moment in history soon to be forgotten. Totally normal.

MAYBE you were just nervous and that's totally normal too.

Just MAYBE your instincts are telling you the connections you think you feel are temporary and not based on Love. Trust your instincts, they are given to you for a good reason. And this is Totally normal.

Bottom line, the first time serves as a reminder for many things like your preservation of life skills (hope you use a condom), your detachment and reattachment of your body and soul and MAYBE, JUST MAYBE a sign from your higher power telling you to stop writing checks your rear end can't cash (broken promises to any one sucks, but to HIM?) . Gutsy, but Totally normal for most.

Conclusion: You are totally normal, don't fret and use a condom.

Answer 5

You are experiencing a self-induced anxiety reaction. By making this one act so important to yourself psychologically (and probably having it strongly reinforced by your religious culture) you built up the sex act into something it was never really intended to be. So when it happened, your whole body reacted and now you feel that same anxiety turned even more inward, guilt and depression. I can not comment on your religious views, but I would encourage you to put sex into a more balanced perspective. Intercourse is as natural to the human species as breathing. It is not supposed to be such a burden for us. Be at peace. You are just being human. Be careful. Practice safe sex. Choose your partners wisely. Have fun. That's how it works.

Answer 6

Its both...you werent ready and you broke your promise.The promise u made was not only to God but also to yourself.You let yourself down as well.And the worst part is that it was your first time and first times remain forever.You will always be reminded of this.But deal with it,accept it cause if you dont,you might find yourself been another person.Its very important that you accept this.Dont push him away either.Do you really feel that it was out of love.Im sure if he loved you he wud have been okay with stopping.And if you didnt say anything to him,then why not cause with love,you should be able to say anything to that person.

Answer 7

you're actually not the 1st individual to grant in to sexual needs and then be apologetic approximately it and sense disgusted. you're actually not the 1st individual to do stupid issues interior the call of a courting. Your regrets are regularly occurring and not uncommon. you have in basic terms have been given to come again and settle for them. you weren't raped--it became your decision, no longer in basic terms his. He became a manipulative jerk who took great thing approximately your naivete, yet you have been an grownup and in charge too. you would be able to desire to settle for this and do away with your anger and hatred, with the aid of fact the anger itself is detrimental to you, and as long as you physique this as something that became carried out TO you, particularly than something you probably did, you will sense victimized and helpless and prefer there would be no longer something which would be carried out to stop this. positioned this in perspective as an regrettably undesirable decision on your area. that's in the back of you, and at some point you will giggle at how stupid you have been. It became a getting to grasp adventure and at an analogous time because it became unlucky, it helped you strengthen into the guy you're today, and the guy you're today's individual who has formed a great courting with a great individual and now you have a vivid destiny. stable success on your destiny at the same time!

Answer 8

I don’t know what to say, its sad. I know the feeling it happened to me to... You felt like that because you didn’t keep your promise and you lost your virginity and there’s nothing you can do about it. Its like when somebody dies, its gone and nothing you can do about it, only time can heal. I just went on having sex afterwards because I love him very much and we had lots of love making and lots of fun. Its part of life and it happened and your not a bad girl, remember its nature and I believe its wrong to sleep with lots of guys and not to have one partner. You must have one and if you’re meant to be you’ll stay together or you'll meat somebody else. Only time will tell. Be patient and don’t hate yourself for what happened and don’t lower your standards because you’re not a virgin anymore, keep your head high! You’re a woman now! Talk to your BF, tell him how you feel so that he can comfort you, he also needs you. Best of Wishes :-}

Answer 9

Now would be a good time to take a little vacation from sexual activity until you feel sure of what you want. You love each other? Considered marriage? You might need to talk to someone close and make sure you know what you really want. Losing your virginity is not losing yourself.

Answer 10

You feel depressed because you don't trust him.I don't think that you love him after one month of dating.I think that you are very young and he is much older than you.YOU made a mistake, this is why you feel depressed now, think things moved too fast for you.You weren't sure about your feelings but you carried on.You have to be very careful from now on, you have to think before you act.Don't worry nobody gets their first time as they wanted and even if they do they don't appreciate it.

Answer 11

I think you feel bad because of your broken promise to God. I suggest you pray and ask for forgivness. You will be forgiven. Then maybe you should wait until you get married until you have sex again.