2006-11-02 16:21:38 · 12 answers · asked by Karen F 2 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
Denial, I went through it when my mom was diagnosed. If I didn't go see her, she couldn't get worse... I guess time would stand still, but it didn't and she got worse. That's when reality sunk in for me, but there may still be hope for your Dad.
I am currently in the Bahamas with my Mother who has Terminal Lung Cancer. There is a clinic here that has been in operation for over 30 years. (www.immunemedicine.com) We have been here for 4 of our 8 week stay, everyday is really neat. A lot of the patients stick around in the meeting room/ waiting room to visit, and share stories and catch up. There were 40 people all talking and laughing, talking about cancer and life, the returning patients talk about how bad their cancer was 4, 8, 10 even 18 years ago when they started coming to the clinic, the cancer that has since disappeared. Many of them did not come here until they had exhausted all other options and were considered terminal, some with only weeks or months to live. There is nothing dangerous or foreign to the treatment, just building up your immune system in a very effective manner so that it can identify and fight the cancer. If you want to know more contact me or go to www.immunemedicine.com I cannot tell you how impressed I am with what I have seen and how my Mother has already improved. I know one man who was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, he skipped all US, conventional (poisonous, dangerous) options and went to the Bahamas and is doing great now. Another man who has been coming here for 18 years that had prostate cancer. People with just about every type of cancer. But, they are honest here, you send them your medical information and they will tell you whether they believe they can help you or not, and they will send you home if they don't think you are benefiting.
My mom has shown drastic improvements and is feeling so much better. and we are in the Bahamas so we are having a good Mother-Daughter vacation.
I have also done a lot of research on the Cesium Chloride/DMSO treatment and think that it has merit and you can do it at home.
The clinic here believes that a supplement/liquid called VIBE works really well in addition to other treatments, I am going to look in to that some more.
Most doctors will tell you not to try alternative medicine and some will refuse to even see you again if you do. To some degree they are not to blame, they have not been taught anything about it other than that it is evil and wrong and they would be rejected by their colleagues if they suggested alternatives.
Tell your brothers that time is not standing still just because they are not there, maybe give them this information, if they are involved, that may help.
One very helpful website is www.cancertutor.com
Good luck!!
2006-11-06 15:26:41 · answer #1 · answered by Kris B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They may possibly be in denial. But it's very important that if they choose not to visit that they at least talk to him on the telephone. They will always have difficulty with unresolved issues if they don't have some sort of acceptance and closure with him before he passes.
Strangely enough many people who have been in this situation say that the most precious moments they spent with their close relative was the time before his or her death while the person was still lucid enough for frank and loving communication.
But please make sure they don't wait too long. Seeing a comatose parent who's just a shell of a previously strong person can be very very traumatic and something your brothers may never get over.
2006-11-02 17:01:37 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Sue 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
In this type of situation, it's not uncommon for people to want to "hide" from the issue, especially if it's dealing with someone they love. When my grandfather was told he only had a few months to live once his cancer spread to his bones, I had a very difficult time going to visit him or even calling him. I loved him immensely, but the little girl in me always thought he'd be immortal. Realizing that he was going to die really shattered that innocence in me and it was very difficult to come to terms with the fact that one day he wasn't going to be there anymore. I finally did start calling him and visiting him and I'm so thankful I did because he died only 3 months after being told that he'd die in a few months (he had a 13 year battle with cancer, so it wasn't like he just "gave up"...he knew when it was time to go). It's been nearly 3 years since his death and it's still very hard on me. But I am grateful for the time I had with him.
I can't speak for exactly where your brothers are at. But I will say that just the thought of losing someone you love so much can make a person just hide away from reality. You think that person will always be there, so it takes time to adjust to the fact that they won't be.
You and your family will be in my thoughts.
2006-11-02 16:37:20 · answer #3 · answered by Mary K 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My father died of lung cancer without ever seeing his daughter and my 1/2 sister. We tried to call her and tell her so many times, but she never made it and didn't call. Finally when he was literally on his death bed and hospice was there she decides to call! She asks me what was going on!! I told her and we put the phone near my father but is was too late for them to even speak. II don't know what kept her from calling and coming. I think it's partly that she didn't realize the gravity of the situation because it's a difficult thing to learn someone you love is dying. I think it's also that she wasn't here and she didn't see what was happening to him. I also think she was just stubborn and confused. After he died she sent us a card about how she loved him and wished she had been here. I was mad when she didn't call but now I'm just sorry for her. It was her lost, and she can never have that time back with my dad. She will have to live with that. My point? That this is a situation I've experienced and that I don't think there is a straight answer. Enjoy your time with your father, because once he is gone you can never have him or those moments back. It's the hardest thing I've ever experienced, but I got through it and so will you. My love.
2006-11-02 16:34:36 · answer #4 · answered by Rayslittlegurl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow - thats awful - Im sorry to hear about that.
Some folks really dont know how to behave. Others carry resentments. Others feel threaten about being around terminally ill people. Perhaps a call from your dad to your brothers may help.
2006-11-02 16:31:43 · answer #5 · answered by rokdude5 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sometimes people are stubborn and depending on the grudge they carry they may not feel that an illness is a reason to forgive someone or it can be sheer laziness you need to be stronger and not make the same mistake in your life just learn from this experience if this is not how you want people to treat someone then learn from this. I like this thought :Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;Courage to change the things I can;And wisdom to know the difference. it has helped me through many obstacles in life.
2006-11-02 16:31:54 · answer #6 · answered by simplehoneylove 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hi, I even have felt such as you previously and have faith me as quickly as I permit you know i know ways you experience. first lost my little brother then the different brother some years later by capacity of the time i replaced into 40 yrs previous I had lost my finished kinfolk which incorporate my grandparents and aunts and Uncles. once you do no longer communicate with the Lord or pray you experience offended ill at heart. the place are you going to get help? you should be solid and save the religion with out God you haven't any longer something he's the only one that could make it easier to.Get down on your knees and pray and save on praying. 2 years I had an quite undesirable stroke on a similar time as i replaced into drowsing. my eye replaced into swollen close my lip replaced into swollen it touched my nostril. Tongue replaced into numb I gave the impression of a freak my boyfriend placed me interior the truck and informed me we've been going to the emergency room I agreed yet informed him i had to circulate to the church to choose he pronounced he might supply me 15 min and that replaced into it . as quickly as I have been given to the church I have been given down on my knees and that i prayed I felt some thing come over me and that i knew i replaced into going to be ok as i've got been given up and walked in direction of the truck my boyfriend gasp I pronounced i know we could circulate abode . It replaced into long gone all I felt replaced into susceptible in my legs. save the religion and save solid . you have been chosen. God Bless
2016-10-21 04:35:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak to your Dad's doctor and ask him if there is any kind of support group in your area that you could go to...They will help you understand what is going on and they may also have a way of convincing your siblings to contact your Dad....
2006-11-03 00:50:20 · answer #8 · answered by lorac 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe they don't want to face the issue? Or except whats happening.
2006-11-02 16:23:43 · answer #9 · answered by magnolia_76 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
they are probably having a hard time dealing with it.
2006-11-02 16:24:01 · answer #10 · answered by purple 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋