I am inlove with a man who is way older than me. I'm 22 and i think he's 58... I don't know how to let him know that i'm interested in him romantically... He's a very open minded person but at the same time i dont know how to approach him because he recently got divorced..
2006-11-02 15:49:28 · 18 answers · asked by norma 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he's been legally separated for over 6 years and i've known him for about 4 years... we are friends now... i just dont want to ruin the friendship... i think he is interested in me, i just dont know how to continue to explore and stuff... he pretty much lives like a monk and is very respectful so this makes it even harder to try to approach him in a that sort of way... not only that but im not very experienced with that sort of stuff.
2006-11-02 16:06:00 · update #1
Ask him out :-)
2006-11-02 15:51:36 · answer #1 · answered by Heather 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
wow this is kinda touchy, first he recently got divorced, second the age gap may make him not take you seriously. if he has just gone through a divorce he is having some emotional effect. his self esteem would surly be boosted by your interest, but he may not think you are seriously interested in him. how well do you know him? does he confide in you? do you know his relationship with his ex? there are, many times, very strong ties with the ex for sometime, and most men will try to revisit the old nest just to be sure that it is truely over. maybe it would be wise to invite him for coffee or a drink to chat, so you can get some insite as to what his situation is. if you are serious about wanting a relationship with him you might give him an opened invitation to have lunch or dinner, like tell him, " i think getting out will do you some good, i'd like to take you out out for a drink or coffee? " what ever you think is appropriate. good luck!
2006-11-03 00:06:48 · answer #2 · answered by cvgm702 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You realize he"s old enough to be your grandfather? If he's just divorced, how have you gotten to know him well enough to know you are in love with him?
Take a good look at how you came to feel this way, and why...it seems unlikely that a romantic love could have blossomed in your heart for a guy who, until recently, has been married (and thus, one would assume, involved with his wife and not out philandering with other women).
It's not impossible that a 36 yr difference in ages can work, but it's unlikely...there's simply far too much difference in the people and their lives...your life experiences are different, he's thinking retirement and you're (likely) just deciding on your career...his adult life is past it's mid and yours is just beginning...you're likely to have little in common, be at different physical levels, and emotional/maturity levels...
Be really sure of your feelings before putting yourself out there...especially because some older guys wouldn't hesitate to take advantage of a "sweet young thing" like yourself...
2006-11-02 23:57:19 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go for it. i'm in the same situation right now, and I went after what I wanted, now I'm happier than I've ever been. Do your thing gurl, if you dont than you'll probably regret it. Get him b4 someone else does. Take it slow at first, then within giving him time to heal, move in for it. You dont wanna be his rebound
2006-11-02 23:57:26 · answer #4 · answered by 1hotmama 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if were me i wouldnt want to be with someone that much older than me. i am 24 and my dad will soon be 44 and my mum would be 45 if she were still alive so he is older than my parents.
if he hasn't told you if he likes you romantically then maybe you should just say something! if his birthday is coming up or even in his christmas card write it! if you cant think of what to say or are to nervous
2006-11-02 23:55:52 · answer #5 · answered by Krissy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Slow your roll! Let it come on naturally or it may not come along at all. Be his friend first and let everything else take it's coarse as it should. You don't want him feeling like it's to soon or your to young, or a million other things that can alter how he really feels.
2006-11-02 23:55:14 · answer #6 · answered by MedicineWoman 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would approach him in the same way that you would any man you were interested in...ask him out for lunch or something.
2006-11-02 23:51:55 · answer #7 · answered by Violante 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dating an older guy isnt always a bad thing, but he's probably your dads age! lol
2006-11-02 23:52:20 · answer #8 · answered by Wondering 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't,slap yourself,take a cold shower,wake up and have a cup of Java !
2006-11-02 23:56:31 · answer #9 · answered by don_steele54 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
talk to him ---- he should be able to pick up that you like him
it can work and being divorced should not make a major barrier
2006-11-02 23:53:19 · answer #10 · answered by trader1867 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
really? i think he'd be absolutely thrilled. but yeah he might not want to make the commitment if he doesnt really like you too.
2006-11-02 23:51:51 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋