For my father in laws b-day, he handed my husband a piece of paper with an appointment on it for my son to go to speach theropy, My son is a normal active 4 yr. old, and I don't think he has any speech problems. My father in law never took and interest in my daughter and her speech, so why my son? Then yesterday he stated that he wanted to go to the appointment with me. My kids are happy, spoiled, and totally loved children, why is he butting in? If I thought for an instant my son was having difficuley with talking, believe me, I would be the first to have it checked out. Thanks for you opinions.
2006-11-02 15:08:31 · 20 answers · asked by Windy 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
in laws are tricky people, they tend to butt in when they really shouldnt and adding grandparent to that title makes it 10 times worse. they think they know whats best for the child since they have more "experience" under their belt. I'm not trying to defend him in any way but im sure his intentions were for good and not as an insult to you. He should of consulted you and expressed his feelings before making an appointment for YOUR child. As a parent you can decide to cancel the appointment and let it be, OR you can go to it and see what the professional has to say in reguards to your child's speech progress. in the end its YOUR choice, not his. best of luck
2006-11-02 16:52:41 · answer #1 · answered by clubsandra 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would talk to my husband about it and tell him how I felt then ask him to speak with his father since in all reality your father-in-law gave the paper with the appointment to his son. I wouldn't take it personal about him showing more interest in your son's speech as opposed to your daughter's. He probably just felt that your son may be learning a little slower than your daughter. Although your father-in-law may be concerned, the decision to take your son to a doctor is between you and your husband and if you don't feel there is a need then don't go.
2006-11-02 15:25:13 · answer #2 · answered by MJ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah That is a little creepy,,,But you also have to think you are around your son all the time it may feel like he is butting in but maybe he just hear something that you think is normal and it may not be so give him the benifit of the doubt go to the appointment if they say your son is ok then hopefully he will leave thematter alone and if not then you may have a problem but untill then maybe he sees something you dont that is possible you know you might wantto be greatful maybe your son does have a speech problem you just dont hear it so as far as that I hope everything works out for the best good luck and god bless you i will keep him in my prayers
2006-11-02 15:14:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your father-in-law adores his grandson so much that he wants the kid to be perfect in every way, and so if grandpa detects, in his mind, a speech impediment, he feels compelled to let you know.
Tell grandpa you appreciate his love and concern for his grandson, and you notice that your son does talk a little differently too, but he talks normally for a four year old, and if he has a problem when he starts kindergarten, you'll let grandpa know and let grandpa come to any appointments.
Just humor him a little bit and be kind. Don't be offended or take it personally either. By the time your son starts kindergarten, grandpa will have forgotten all about it anyway.
I'm so glad your kids are so loved!
2006-11-02 15:42:25 · answer #4 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It dosen't sound like a big deal to me, but I can understand why you question it. Here my opinion you wanted. While strange, be happy that you children have grandparents who care so much and have the money to help back it up. Take the grandfather with you it will either confirm his suspected diagnosis, or put all worry to rest for him. Have you ever thought that maybe other see/hear things that you don't? Grandpa HAS been a parent longer than you ya know? Often times we as parents think we are our childs only source of paretning they need, but grandparents neeed to be given some time too! Take him with you and let him deal with the kids while you take a minute to relax. I would love to have a concerned grandparent like that! Did you forget the saying "It takes a village to raise a child".
2006-11-02 15:30:15 · answer #5 · answered by nene 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your in-law is butting in cause as most father's and grandfather age they see the heir to the family as the last chance to get thing's right.As to your inlaw doing this I think you need to tell him to step back and let you and your husband raise him and that if and only if a doctor tells you he has a problem you will deal with it and his offer willl be gratiously accepted but not before that time.How does your husband feel about his dad's actions is another thing that factur into this equation though he may feel the same way if so you need to talk to him but if he feels as you do then let him know what you expect from him as well as his dad.
2006-11-02 15:39:17 · answer #6 · answered by rsbalent 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father in law is butting in because obviously he cares. Take your son to the appointment, and let your father in law go along. What harm can it do? Either you son will be diagnosed with a problem and be scheduled for therapy or he won't. No major issue unless YOU make it one.
2006-11-02 15:14:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes as mothers, we may overlook something such as a speech problem because we get used to the way our children talk. What could it hurt to have your child see a doctor and then you and your father in law will both be satisfied. If there is a problem that you are unaware of, you need to know.
2006-11-02 15:18:38 · answer #8 · answered by just guessing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best friend has a 5 year oldson that she speaks extremlly well, in actuality I can not understand much of what he says. I would never tell her that, but most people have no clue what he is saying, we may get one word and give a vague answer. Many parents do not see speech probs with their children, you understand him, ou are with him alot! Consider this a loving gesture by your father in law & let him come w/ you. If there is no problem like you believe he will hear it for himself
2006-11-02 15:14:13 · answer #9 · answered by notAminiVANmama 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father in law is hoping that you will take him seriously and get your son some therapy. I think he did it in a strange way rather than to talk to you directly about it, or has he in the past and you have rejected his comments?
Take your son to the therapist and have him analyzed, then it will settle all of it and you'll stay friends with your father in law.
You marry more than a husband, you also marry his family (unfortunate sometimes). Good Luck!
2006-11-02 15:13:20 · answer #10 · answered by Barbara 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋