What is going on? Only Christians please...I need your help.?

Question

I hate being a Christian sometimes. My parents are pastors..and they expect me to sit at home with them instead of being with my friends. I can't listen to normal music (sorry guys, but some christian music sucks) I can't watch what most of the other kids watch even though it is not bad. I can't do anything! And they just say they love me...well, i feel like I am being suffocated! My brother is not a Christian but he gets away with much more stuff..Sometimes I get so depressed and wish I could die. I hate being a Christian because it sets me in a cage. But I love God...What am I supposed to do?

Answer 1

I don't think you are experiencing the effects of christianity but rather the effects of your parents being too over-protective. Real christianity is about liberty and freedom.

Your parents love you and are probably a bit too unwilling to let you grow up too quickly. Take it easy and don't be too hard on them.

Don't allow this to affect your faith. I think its a separate issue altogether. Pray about this and and maybe approach your parents and have a discussion that is honest and open about how your really feel and about needing trust from them as well. If you are behaving responsibly and they have no reason to mistrust you then they may see that they are being a bit restrictive.

Answer 2

You say you love GOD. That's the key. Please don't ever loose that. I might suggest that you keep your personal relationship with GOD and the relationship with your parents separate. Here is why. You say "I hate being a Christian sometimes." Really? Or do you hate being required to have more restrictions then other kids because your parents are more strict? See? You are free in Jesus. Your parents are responsible for you and your brother and are doing what they think is best. You are acting 100% normal and I would be very lucky to have an unhappy daughter like you :) really. There will come a time when you are calling all the shots. And maybe a day when you will have children of your own. Think of how you will teach them about life. Hang in there. Its not fun.
May GOD richly bless you.

Answer 3

yeah not all christian music is good, actually it is pretty hard to find good music. but it is not the music which is the problem it is the lyrics, have to be very careful what you listen to, some songs have such an evil effect. And go with your friends but be very careful who you hang around with, they can help you or they can hurt you. Your brother is not a Christan, then he accepts the consequences, be very careful. He may seem happy with such little boundaries but what he watches and does can and does have consequences, you see the good because he is free but you do not see the bad. music is an instrument of Satan to influence weak minds and t.v is an even more powerful weapon. What is said and put on TV is just so foolish, watch and you will see that what is put on will lead poor helpless souls to hell. Gain your freedom by leaving your parents rules but find yourself coming back, hurt and torn, the world and its entertainment has nothing to offer. there are some good songs though, even if they are considered worldly just because they do not have the christian title, but use discretion. just because it say Christan does not make the song automatically good, pray for your parents. if you move against them they will move against you, take it to god and tell him how you feel. What is unfair he will remove, remember he controls you and your parents, so he is the ultimate authority.

Answer 4

Maybe you should suggest a child development class for them. In my child development class, we learned that teens need a lot of space to explore their identities. If a parent does not respect that need, the result is the relationship between the teen and the parent is shredded by the rebellion of the teen (said rebellion being totally expected in this case).

I would suggest you tell them that you feel like you, your wants, and your needs are not being respected and you have a well of frustration building up inside you and you are afraid of an explosion. They may listen, they may not.

I do want to warn you though, that whatever decisions you make are YOUR decisions. Don't blame them on your parent's lack of parenting skills. Even if you do, you will still have to live with the consequences. If your parents refuse to listen, rather than acting out, I suggest you find a safe adult who will listen to your frustration, help you think through your decisions (to make sure they are not made in anger), and who will encourage you to hold strong until you are old enough to leave your parent's house and have somewhere to go.

Good luck.

Answer 5

well this depends on your age. are you old enough to take responsibility for your actions? sometimes even parents can be right because mabe not so much music im christian and i listen to everything but tv in where you can actually watch so much viloince that you become desentized and it does not affect you so therefore sometimes people think its ok. loving God though isnt always about going to church or praying although He does want that but the ability to have choices placed in front of you and make the right ones. after years of going to church this is what ive come to the conclusion of. have a talk with your parents and explain how you feel . hope that helps.

Answer 6

well, one point I'd like to make is that boys are often given more freedoms than girls, and it has nothing to do with religion.
We all have to find our way in the world. I love my parents' religion because I love them. I also love it for its own value. But there was a time when I was full of resentment toward it, and I finally recognized the rebelliousness of myself (it took a few years) and asked my guardian angel to show me the value of religion. I thought it couldn't hurt, and no, he didn't answer right away. But he eventually did answer my question, which, quite frankly, I'd forgotten I'd asked.
So, be patient. Keep your daily prayers.
Do your best to respect your parents while you are in their house.
Take care of yourself. Being depressed is natural if your hormones are wacko. You are still too young to be on your own, but you yearn for independence. We all go through that. My parents embarassed me all the time when I was 14-15. I couldn't stand shopping with my mother at all. I read a lot of books and played cards. Fortunately for me, I had older brothers and sisters that paved the way, so I didn't have to worry about music and stuff. Good luck, and don't stress out.

Answer 7

I have known other preacher's kids, and they felt much the same. It is as though P.K.s have to set an example, because they were raised in the church. Many of the ones I have known went about and did their own thing -- they knew that their parents worried about what people thought, and some of them rebelled entirely because they were so sick of being restricted. But hey, it's your life. Express yourself. If they love you, then they should TRUST you. You're not 3 years old. Trust your own judgment -- you sound like a sensible person. Good luck.

Answer 8

I don't know how old you are but it sounds to me like your parents do love you, they just don't trust the Lord enough to let you have a little more freedom. When you say that you can't be with your friends, do you mean Christian friends? As to listening to Christian music you ought to check out some of the links on the Free Stuff page of my site @ http://web.express56.com/~bromar/

You can get all types of Christian music from Rock to Rap to Contemporary for free! If you like Rock music check out Apologetix. They play secular songs with Christian lyrics and they sound a lot like the bands they get their songs from.

Anyhow, I'm sorry to hear that your parents are seemingly over protective. I'm sure they do love you and they don't want you to get led into the sinful ways of this world. Maybe you could find some Christian friends from your church whom your parents would let you go out with or something like that.

Answer 9

You sat you love God. God says that the proof of love for Him is in keeping His commandments. Remember one of them is to Honor your Father and your Mother. Now you must choose. 1. Is Gods commandment true? 2 Did God make a mistake giving you them as parents? 3 Is God not in control of all these events (Providence). 4 Is your heart not discontented with God and His ways because you want your own way? 5 How best can you take up your cross and follow Him
Oh they may indeed be overly cautious but God never makes mistakes. Do you trust Him? Prove to your parents that you are trustworthy.

Answer 10

Being a parent, I can tell you that it is a really really hard job and it's really hard to know what is right and wrong. I know that when my kids were teens, I wanted so much to just hang onto them and keep them home and safe. I guess it's the thought of them in pain that gets to me.
With that said, I imagine your parents are more conservative than even I was and more protective than I was with my kids. I think it would be helpful for them to hear you tell them that you are growing up and they did a good job in teaching you from right and wrong. Tell them they have been good parents and now it's time for you to prove what you have learned from them. Explain to them that it's important for you to socialize with your friends and that you are trustworthy and careful and will not do anything that you know is wrong.
If you do this in a non-judgemental way and a way that they can see that you are mature, it might help. Good luck to you!