she,s giving me a hard time,I want to dump her because its getting too serious for her,talking about marriage and what our child will be called etc.it was doing my head in,I thought the best thing would be to let her go now so I can move on and she can too,but she won,t go quietly,i never at any time said that i loved her as love is so complicated for me just now,as I just came out of a long relationship.what do i do to make things easier for her and me.
2006-11-02 12:56:23 · 21 answers · asked by david h 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
looks to me like it's time to be a complete b'stard. Either a) get drunk and make a pass at her best friend or b) make love to her and moan her best friends name at the appropriate time. or c) go out with the lads and send a filthy text to her mobile but make sure another girls name is in the text.
either of these will get you dumped and no clinging - make sure you tell your mates the plan before you put it into action. This will big you up and it is also a second line of defence if she finds out you planned it you will definetley get dumped
2006-11-02 13:12:34 · answer #1 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK, there are pros and cons of what I'm about to say (and this is from a woman's point of view and I know what turns women into a bunny boiler, hahaha. or the kinds of bullcrap I've heard/used in my time, lol).
1) Tell you have gotten back with your ex. Or tell her that you still have feelings for your ex that you thought had gone away but hadn't (make up a chance meeting if you have to). Tell her that it wouldn't be fair on her if you carried it on whilst still maintaining feelings for the ex because you would be cheating her. THEN TURN YOUR PHONE OFF FOR A MONTH.
2) Tell her the truth. Tell her you need a break. Chances are she'll still mither you, but it's the most honest (and softly-softly) approach.
3) Tell her you're gay/thinking of going into the priesthood/joined the foreign legion. A blatant lie but a good one.
4) Tell her you have an STI and that you're so ashamed that you can't see her anymore. Tell her to get to the clinic. The relief of finding out that she's in the clear will take her mind off the fact that you have legged it/gone into hiding.
5) Turning your phone off/screening calls/generally being unavailable is SO FRUSTRATING to a woman, but they get to sweat it out on their own which hurts but there's a lot less shouting. Be prepared for a long-winded, emotional letter/e-mail.
Hope this helps :-)
2006-11-02 13:06:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know some things in life cannot be made easy. Just break up with her clean and final. Do not do the standard, "It's not you it's me."
Be honest and say you are not in love and want to date others. Be kind, but leave no room for doubt. Don't say you'll think about it, or maybe later or whatever. Do it quick, clean and certain.
She's going to hurt, but she'll get over it. Then once done, do not allow yourself to get drawn into anything again. If she calls, check your caller ID, if she lies about you, don't call her on it, ignore her.- your true friends will know the truth.
No - bunnyboiling is a reference to the movie Fatal Attraction, with Mike Douglas and Glenn Close - when he dumped her, she boiled the daughters pet rabbit.
2006-11-02 13:00:02 · answer #3 · answered by chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just follow the following rules:
1. Do it in person and alone, not via any other medium.
2. Don't EVER say, "It's not you........"
3. Be as honest as possible in how you feel.
4. Be sensitive when discussing the things that bother you about her.
5. Don't slag off her friends or family. That will just add fuel to the fire.
6. Don't tell her you want to be friends. It rarely works out that way.
2006-11-02 13:13:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like a clinger, and the longer you wait, the harder it is going to be to get rid of her. Best thing is to just call her right now and tell her its over, and why. If you have to, refer her to the question you just asked so she can read other's opinions.
She also may be one of those girls who has had a hard homelife, and lives in a soap opera fantasy world. Getting married and having a baby, in her mind, offers security and comfort to a world that has been shaky and upsetting to her up to this point in her life. If this is true, it is not your fault, and don't let her lay a guilt trip on you about it.
No magic words for you my friend. But, I will tell you to take care of it ASAP, or she will cling all the tighter. She also sounds like somewhat of a control freak, and, for me personally, that screams red light!
2006-11-02 13:02:11 · answer #5 · answered by rhino 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell her that this ain't something you want right now
that a relationship this heavy and intense is not your cup of tea so they say. Express you just ended a long term thing and do not wish to get into anything at this time she needs to move on a find a guy who will do this with her cut the cord.
2006-11-02 13:01:12 · answer #6 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her that you just came out of a long relationship and are not ready for the serious commitment. Tell her that you really need some time for yourself to gather thoughts and get yourself together. Inform her that you're sorry but you had to end it now before she became to attached to you, as you're just not ready.
2006-11-02 13:02:23 · answer #7 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, here is what you do-- you grow a backbone and you tell the girl where you are coming from and that you don't see a future with her right now. You be clear, firm and as kind as possible without sending mixed signals.
Girls "boil the bunny" when men do weasle things like just disappear without saying anything.
2006-11-02 12:59:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I bet your enjoying all the attention cause this is feeding your ego, and your loving it.
I bet you have told all your mates about this girl and how much she wants you, and now you have come on here to tell us all about how much she wants you.
Just tell her your sorry but it's over you never meant to hurt her. and if she gives you any abuse just say I'm sorry you feel that way can you please get on with your life so I can get on with mine.
Anyway hope she doesn't get to the boiling bunny stage, take care.
2006-11-02 14:41:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree that you should let her go now as your feelings are so different. You may lie and say you have met someone else or that you need time by yourself, but this girl, being what she is woun't let go easily
2006-11-02 17:45:11 · answer #10 · answered by EC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋