My depression is starting to ruin my life.?

Question

I have been depressed for a very long time. In my early 20's I went down to party in Rosarito, Baja. A few of my so called friends raped me & beat me. It happened when we got back to the hotel room. I found myself helpless & not able to control any part of my body. I yelled and was trying to get up but I could not. I had about 5 beers that night nothing to make me pass out or black out. I am almost positve they put something in one of my beers. They proceded to beat me and soaghtamize me. Yelling and telling me I didn't deserve to have a girlfriend like I did. That guys like them that work hard and go to college deserve women like her. To this day I think of suicide, just about everyday. Last July I finally went fricken nuts, and broke down and had to go to the hospital. They gave me Prozac and it seemed to change my chemical inbalance. Lately it seem as if I'm starting to get depressed again. How can I stop being depressed?

Answer 1

It sounds like you are depressed because you are taking on some of the responsibilty for the attack. You were a victim and you have unresolved anger, frustration, embarrassment and shame going through your mind. My sincere advice is, you need to call a therapist at a rape center right away so you can talk about the horrible and terrifying rape, beating and obvious drugging. You couldnt move your legs or arms, so you did get drugged. Beer cant do that to you. You should report it to the police, even though it is your word against theirs and there is no physical proof, they will be arrested and it will be on their record. I just hope they dont do this to others, but they probably have done it to others before you, so to help yourself recover, report them, seek out a rape counsler, and begin to forgive your self, you did nothing wrong. What they said is BS rationalization for what terrible things they were doing, rapists are criminals and belong in prison. The reason you broke down is because you cant solve or resolve this on your own. Dont let them drug you off with prozac, you have to get to the place where you are pro-active in your recovery and drugs just postpone it. Please call the rape center, they know how to help you, and they will know what you need. Please? Do it for all of the other people that have been raped and be sure to report the bastards, you may be needed to help put them away. Dont let another week go by, call tonight, get going in the right direction. it wont heal itself and you cant ignore it away. You need help and support for being the victim of a violent crime. You need some kind, understanding and some feelings of safety and help begining the healing process. Remember that there are people all over this world that have been beaten and raped, you like them must find the healing so you can move forward, then you may be able to help someone down the road go through the healing process.

Answer 2

First of all I apologize for what you went through. I have had severe depression for about 10 years now. I've attempted suicide many times and have been hospitilized on several occasions. You need to see a therapist and talk to someone to help you through this. If your doctor put you on any meds please stay on them because if you don't the depression will come back every time.

Answer 3

I am a master's level social worker. It sounds like you probably have PTSD which is post traumatic stress disorder. You really need to start seeing a therapist to work through what has happened to you. Not dealing with things like this cause depression and other mental problems as well. Good luck.

Answer 4

You need to continue seeing a doctor, as well as a crisis counselor. If the Prozac isn't helping, there are different meds. You are limping through this horrifying ordeal without the proper help. You have to take care of yourself, and maybe someday you'll be able to help others who are suffering what you went through. I only hope and pray that what goes around, comes around, those "friends" of yours should be rotting in jail. Please continue to reach out for help.

Answer 5

please try not to live in the past, and put this bad experience behind you or it will make you depressed. I am sorry you are so unhappy. Try and take an interest in a hobby or something creative, it will really help you. Draw a line under it and start again. Think positive don't let those negative feelings in again. You can do it. Good luck to you! Big hugs to you.
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Answer 6

Let me start off by saying that i'm very sorry for what happened to you. The people that did this to you should be in jail. Talk to a therapist and work thru this. Please don't let these people win by taking your life. Your a survivor. I can't tell you how not to be depressed but talking about it is the first step. I will pray for you and you will get thru this.

Answer 7

Dude, go to your doctor and tell him how your depressed. Give him all the symptoms you are having. He will be able to diagnose and treat you or send you to someone who can. That's my best bet. I am very sorry for what happened to you. I am gay, but that should not happen to anyone. I hope you can find the help you need and the love you deserve. Good luck!

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Terry
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Answer 8

What the ****?! Your "freinds" need to die... All rapists need to die... You should go rape them.. Your freinds are *******.. They don't deserve any type of woman, and no woman deserves them... You deserve your girlfriend... I think. That **** would make me want to kill myself too... You're a strong individual, keep staying strong... I would probably never be myself again.. I would probably just sit in a corner for the rest of my life with my thumb in my mouth, wimpering like a baby, with a thousand mile stare.

Answer 9

i wish i new the answer to that. i don't know though. stay strong and never give up. i am so sorry for what happened to you. being raped is one of the worst thing ever, i don't think ill ever get over what happened to me either, but you have to think about all the positive things you have in your life. *hug*

Answer 10

I understand how you feel and the only advice I will give you is to get angry. If you don't get angry there is something wrong with you, seek revenge. Plan your revenge as this will give you comfort. If they are not incarcerated that is a good thing that makes them sitting ducks. One by one you should destroy their lives as they have destroyed yours. Taunt them, humiliate them and hurt them. They deserve it and you will feel better. Trust me it works a charm.