I am so confused. I started dating my boyfriend in September. At first it was all him as far as paying for stuff. He never swayed from that. Then, after we established we were boyfriend and girlfriend, it started to change.
See, now he's more open with me and will tell me if he's broke or not. One weekend we had made plans to go see a movie, but we ended up changing those plans and staying at his place. He told me that his parents were out of town and he was having to pay for his dinner that week, etc. I told him we could go see the movie the next week.
Then, that Friday he said we could watch TWO movies. I guess he felt bad for having to cancel.
Then one Sunday, I drove over to his house for the first time and we used my gas that day. I also drove there a few more times.
Anyway, obviously the question is money related. He asked me if I wanted to go to the movies tomorrow or just go to his place and watch one. I don't want to seem like I'm expensive. What is the girl's role?
2006-11-02 09:49:37 · 11 answers · asked by New mommy 2010! 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Basically, he's giving me two options: We can do something that costs him money, or we can do something that doesn't. I enjoy going to the movies, yes, and I enjoy cuddling up on the couch with him. If we go to the movies, I don't think he would allow me to pay for it. I feel guilty even feeling this way. I feel like crying.
2006-11-02 10:02:18 · update #1
He obviously likes you enough to do things that you like to do. Isn't there something else you two can do that doesn't cost alot? Maybe go bowling, go to the park, etc.
2006-11-02 09:53:58 · answer #1 · answered by Stacy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To tell you the truth money is a HUGE thing in every relationship wheather it is dating, marriage or friendships. You need to explain to him that you are not rich either and that you dont mind paying but would like if he could at some point too. The whole the guy pays everytime thing that was in the past as faded. The romance from the past has too. You need to realize that with future things change even the good things. Talk to him about it. Communication is the key to a relationship. You could always say "I payed for the movie last week why dont you pay this week." Plus there are PLENTY of things to do that dont cost money. Maybe watch a movie at his house that you have seen before or go on a walk. I am sure you can think of things to do that dont cost money. Good luck. Hope that helped
2006-11-02 09:56:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suppose the real question is what kind of girl are you? If you are unconfiortable, obviously it is not for you. If you are a girl who likes to be "kept" then of course he should pay. If you are an independent woman, you pay your own way. If you are not sure take a good look at how you are reacting to this situation and figure it out, it may help you set the limits you need to for yourself.
2006-11-02 09:53:21 · answer #3 · answered by Lisa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no role.
If he doesn't have the money, then you have 3 choices:
1. Sit at home all by yourself
2. Sit a home with him
3. Pay to take him out
This isn't a contest with a bill at the end to pay. It's a give and take relationship. Sometimes you give, sometimes you take.
2006-11-02 09:54:02 · answer #4 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The both of you should have jobs, then maybe you could feel a bit more empowered, instead of being down on your luck without money. It will help whenever you want to do something, other than watching the t.v.
2006-11-02 09:54:44 · answer #5 · answered by drkstr1973 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For me when i was dating we would take turns. But if guys know that you are easy when it comes to money than you better just go on and hang it up because you will be paying for ever thing.
2006-11-02 09:56:12 · answer #6 · answered by stephanie_kanode 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nowadays, sharing the financial responsibility is exceptable. When I was dating my husband and I wanted to do something, I would offer to pay or we would take turns. You don't need to keep track of who is paying for what.
2006-11-02 09:54:03 · answer #7 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy should always pay. ALWAYS. Now, if you want to treat here and there thats your deal. But generally, it should be the guys responsiblity to pay for everything as he is the MALE of the relationship. good luck with this kid
2006-11-02 09:54:01 · answer #8 · answered by Mia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
rigidity makes you injury out extra, believe me i'm having the comparable problem using fact college is coming up! Wash your face with zits face wash, it's going to help quit lots of the breakouts.
2016-10-21 04:10:02 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he could be the type that would spend money to get you. then, after he gets you, you start paying. if you feel like he's this kind of guy, break up with him. if not, maybe he's got his problem. still i think he's the type of guy that spend money to get you and you start to pay.
2006-11-02 09:53:39 · answer #10 · answered by mi2z_myst3ry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋