i've talked to him about getting married for the past two years and he said no every time we have three kids together. I just feel like now he wants to but i don't
2006-11-02 09:03:53 · 9 answers · asked by Beauty 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe it is a sign that you really don't want to get married. OR maybe you're insecurity of commitment was hiding behind his. But I suspect you've been living together for a while and now you've been with him so long that you've already lost that spark that many married folk lose after two to three years anyway... not that it's bad, it's just a different point in the relationship.
Whatever the reason, 6 years is a long time, and if you aren't ready to get married, maybe it's time to move on. Talk to your parents. Talk to a pastor/counselor. Talk to a friend. Talk to your boyfriend... if you have good communication, talking about this won't cause a break-up; although, I could see how that would be uncomforatble. Think about life with him, life without him. Would someone else really be better? or just in different ways?
Good luck.
2006-11-02 09:22:15 · answer #1 · answered by volleyjacket 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have any choice. You have three kids together. He's not going anywhere and neither are you. What a lovely thing to do to the children - dad wants to make this operation legit as you have up until now. So the children lose as you move in the next boyfriend. What an awful thing to do. If the guy wants to marry you, marry him and make the best of it. You do this for the children and you don't think about your needs now after three children! Migod, neither one of you cares about these children or their wellbeing. He sounds like a flake and so do you. Grow up.
2006-11-02 11:15:54 · answer #2 · answered by ALWAYS GOTTA KNOW 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I believe that if you have spoken with him about it, and he rejected the idea in the past, that now you still have that at the back of your mind.
Maybe you are saying or thinking you should not because of his past reactions to you bringing up the possibility of marriage.
People do not always know what they want, but another thing is that sometimes people are scared at the idea. Maybe this was the case as well, and now he has realized it has come to be the time to marry you.
Hope this helps
2006-11-02 09:09:06 · answer #3 · answered by bryp1979 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you two really need to sit down and have a heart to heart talk and get ALL the feelings out on the table
2006-11-02 09:06:58 · answer #4 · answered by sTaRgAzEr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
then dont. there are some really good reasons to get married-but having kids with someone isnt one of them
2006-11-02 09:07:10 · answer #5 · answered by miss mackay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you are not sure....tell him...and wait. the only thing that will end up is divorce, if your not sure yet. just say lets see what happens in 2-3 months and then bring it up again, maybe then you will be ready.....or not
2006-11-02 09:07:42 · answer #6 · answered by ema 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then if he said no, why can't you?
Never do it, tell you want too. Sounds like it might be another 6 yers, before u 2 can agree. :-)
2006-11-02 09:06:43 · answer #7 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marry him for the sake of the children's security and future.
2006-11-02 09:08:17 · answer #8 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋