Why is motherhood so easy for some and not others?

Question

I have a friend with a 3 year old and a 6 month old and she can just wake up in the morning and say to herself,"I think I'll go get my nails done, stop by and see a friend then hit the grociery store on the way home."
And she just seems to breeze her way through the day without any set backs!
Me on the other hand I have to plan eveything around medications, naps and try to get help. Granted I have 3 under 2, but leaving the house is just so darn hard for me! I dread doctor visits and going to the bank with my kids because something always happeneds;
poop or throw up, insane fits, injuries, ect. Why is this? Do you feel the same way?

Answer 1

First of all cut yourself some slack. You are a good mother!! The fact that you have three children under the age of 2 is a lot for anyone. Three kids any age, while trying to run errands and feel like you have had a productive day is a challange even on the best days. Don't stress about the stuff that happens. Anyone who has kids understands exactly what you are going through. Do the best you can and if possible space the trips out and use drive thru when ever possible. Have faith it will get easier eventually.

Answer 2

Probably because your friend sounds so carefree and her children are probably the same way.. You have a schedule which right there makes it SUPER hard because 90% of the time that schedule won't work... You need to get on a routine even your kids need to be on a routine and take it from there its way easier.

I have 4 kids under 8yr and since I had each one they get thrown into our routine and everyone adjusts just fine. Pooping diapers you can't help that take a mintue change it and move one..

If possiable set one day a week where your husband can watch the kids and you go out by yourself and do the grocery shopping. Plan a doctor vist after the kids naps or early in the morning. Go through the drive through at your bank if possiable, Things can go smooth for anyone you just have to make it happen and take it one step at a time..
It sounds like your just overstressed and overwhelmed.. BREATHE they are kids..

Our simple routine is:

7:15am eat breakfast
7:20am Homeschool
11:30am Lunch
12-1:00pm errands if needed
1:00pm nap time (mommy break time)
3:00pm play time or any other errands
4:00pm sport practice, ballet,gymnastics
6:00pm dinner
7:00pm quiet time
7:30pm bed time
7:30pm-10:00pm mom and dad time

You just need to find a routine and stick with it dont change anything and have the kids stick to it... You can do it..

Answer 3

I absolutely agree. I think some people make it look so easy when really its not at all. I think the problem with us is that we are worried about everything going Ok and smooth while other people just go with the flow. Its hard letting go of the idea that things are not perfect and no matter how hard you try you have no control over the universe. So try to lighten up a little and just roll with the punches. I think it gets easier after your third or fourth kid because by this time youve seen everything.

Hope it gets easier for you soon.

Take care~

Answer 4

Wow, three kids under the age of two. I have a 2 year old and a 6 month old, and sometimes I dread having to take them both with me to run errands. I think that some women are just lucky to have two cooperative kids to take along with them, as well as a laid back personality that doesn't let life's little setbacks get to them too much. Some kids are definitely more needy of their mom than others, so going out can be a nightmare. I'd say, just go with the flow, and as your kids get older, they'll be easier to handle out in public. Take care!

Answer 5

I think that you are stressing yourself out worrrying about what will happen. I have a 3 year old, and sometiimes things happen. I was in a department store one time when he pooped in pants and it wasn't fun, but I don't expect those things every time. He has also thrown up all over my car, etc. The thing is that if you aren't so stressed, the kids won't pick up on that anxiety. I think it also has to do with your mother and how you felt when you were that age going places with her. Just relax, and don't try to think about what could happen. If it does happen, still relax....it's not the end of the world.

Answer 6

Don't beat yourself up.....some days are harder than others.
I have a 3 and 2 year old.
Trust me, things get easier after they are 2 years old. I'm just now able to get out and do things...but there are still days that can be rough.
Perhaps you can ask your friend for some pointers, too, on how to make going out with little ones easier. Sometimes a few new ideas can make a big difference!

Answer 7

Every one is different,I have good days and bad days.Some days I get up and I'm on the ball{ these are usually the days when my kids,dogs,husband,and general life co-operate} others well I'm lucky if I remember to brush my teeth. The way I see it is Puke happens. As long as your kids are loved,healthy,fed and mostly clean{ I know when they are as young as yours it does not matter how many times you wash those little hands they still come back sticky 2 minutes later} Don't sweat the small stuff. Basically that's just life with kids.It does get better as they get older. As for your friend well I bet she has those days too she just doesn't let you know. Good luck to you and know that there are other mothers out there who understand.

Answer 8

Partially maturity, partially whether they took care of children when they were growing up, partially whether they're the oldest in the family.

I'm the oldest and helped take care of my younger sister and brothers, settling arguments, making sure they didn't get hurt. You get used to keeping an eye out and having 'authority'.

Organization is a big key. If you find yourself running short of time, try a daily planner with some sort of schedule. You won't stick to it perfectly, but it will give you some control over your life.

Answer 9

Nobody has it easy, no matter what you think....but

I will have a four and a half year old and an infant this winter and that will be it. Yep, my life will be easier than yours, but you have three children under 2?????????

That's part of your struggle...her kids are older and that makes all the difference...check out a year from now, and she has one less child than you.

3 kids under 2...I don't know how you function at all.

Answer 10

Motherhood is like everything else in life. While life itself isn't easy for anyone, there are some who cope well with it and take it all in stride, no matter how bad it gets, some simply fall apart at the slightest sign of adversity.

Motherhood is very hard in fact. It isn't about you* anymore, it is about the little person you carried for nine months and are primarily responsible for his/her wellbeing.

It is ESSENTIAL that you* grow up and resolve your own life issues BEFORE you ever decide to bring a baby into this world. No woman below the age of 25 has any business becoming a mother, unless she's totally and utterly mature beyond her years, and is truly capable of putting her baby before herself.