I dated this guy for 2 years, but after he lied and stole money from me, I broke things off. It's been a year now and I have a new boyfriend, but my ex wants to go out for coffee. Is this a good idea? My current boyfriend isn't comfortable with it and gets really upset, but at the same time, he isn't in control of who I choose to be friends with. I don't know what I should do. Please help!
2006-11-02 08:02:26 · 14 answers · asked by lily 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
the real question you should ask yourself is why do you want to see this guy again. you say he lied and stole money from you? that sounds like a decietful person. second of all, no your bf doesnt have control over you, but can you see why this would make him uncomfortable? it makes me uncomfortable and i dont even know you. the thing is, hes your ex for a reason. a very good reason. why do you want to bring him back into your life? from my experience its never a good idea to bring someone back into your life that has done something wrong or hurtful to you. ever. and ive tried it a few times, foolishly. do you want to see him because your having problems with your bf? or just because he doesnt want you to? do you need closure? think about why you want to see him, what you want to get out of it, and be realistic with yourself. maybe youll find that the reason you want to see him really has nothing to do with him. and by the way, i wouldnt trust this guy.
2006-11-02 08:09:16 · answer #1 · answered by faiths13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you think there might be problems with meeting the ex, why not lay down some ground rules that limit what can happen at the coffee meeting. Or you could tell the ex that your current bf wants to be there too and meeting over coffee won't happen unless the current bf is there.
Either way, I think it would be a nice gesture for you to meet your ex for coffee. I don't think it would hurt anything or anyone if you did. My lady still meets with her ex husband, from time to time, and I don't let it bother me because I choose not to let it bother me. Also, I trust her to not meet him for anything other than just to talk.
It's been two years, I think you both have grown a good deal since then. Give it a chance.
2006-11-02 16:08:38 · answer #2 · answered by Red1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, I wouldn't remain friends with someone who stole from me and lied. I wouldn't do it! Don't go! But to give the benefit of the doubt, maybe your ex wants to apologize. But still, if your new beau is having issues about you going to have coffee with your ex, invite him to come along. Otherwise I think you should respect your BF's wishes to an extent, would you want him to go out with an ex chick?
2006-11-02 16:07:48 · answer #3 · answered by briansbutterflygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um, I would say learn from experience. He is your ex for a reason, right? Watch out what you do, you may lose your new boyfriend over this guy. Are you ready and willing to do that?
2006-11-02 16:05:06 · answer #4 · answered by nwest1999 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He stole from you and lied. There is a reason he is your ex! Stay away from him. Your boyfriend has a right to be angry. Just stay away from him.
2006-11-02 16:05:21 · answer #5 · answered by tinkerbell24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your ex wants a slim chance to bang you again
if this is what you are in need of then go for it
otherwise be happy with the guy you are with now
2006-11-02 16:07:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He lied. He stole money.
Stay away. Blinking red lights and caution tape all over this one.
2006-11-02 16:04:52 · answer #7 · answered by kiwi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think you should go
is having coffee with your ex worth throwing away your current relationship?
you current bf will have trust issues and second guess your feelings for him and the relationship will slowly spiral downward. i have seen it happen
2006-11-02 16:06:22 · answer #8 · answered by bob123456789 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you want to have coffee with someone who stole money from you?
2006-11-02 16:04:54 · answer #9 · answered by I'm Trying 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did he offer to buy the coffee? Think about that. Maybe he wants to pay you back...or maybe he wants another "loan"
2006-11-05 11:29:17 · answer #10 · answered by Foss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋