Me & my ex split 3 mths ago, I finshed things. He was heartbroken & as much as I hated seeing him go through pain I thought it would be better to be cruel to be kind so he could move on by nt txting him & being assertive. I now want to get bk & as u can imagine he doesn't, i dont blame him to be fair he was heartbroken & i really hurt him so i do understand y, even though it hurts soo much coz im in-love with him. As I was asking to get bk he became very angry with me when we spk he told me that i was f***ing up his head, he said he still loves me but doesnt know if he is in-love with me coz there is so much hurt still there & he has a defence mechanism that stops him from getting clsoe & had alot of anger. My mum fell ill with cancer in jan and has gotten bad again at 1st he told me he couldnt be there but now says he will as he does still loves me. He has been dating a girl for 2mths, she was his rebound girl but he says he does like her.
2006-11-02 07:43:57 · 15 answers · asked by M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My friends think he is still in-love with me but he has just tried to block me out and it has worked and me now wanting to get bk together after him successfully blocking his feelings out, the anger he has it due to feels coming back and he maybe doesnt want to feel that for me as he is hurt and angry by how i handled things. What do u guys think?? I dont want to hold onto something thats nvr going to happen?? xx
2006-11-02 07:45:35 · update #1
I HONESTLY dont want him because someone else has him, i love him too much to do that and i wouldnt do that to myself... im in-love with him, i really really am x
2006-11-02 07:51:49 · update #2
I split up with him as i fell preganant and we had an abortion and it messed up my head and i took my hurt and anger out on him, it was never that i didnt love him.. an abortion is a emotional and hard thing and i blamed him for it, even though i shouldnt have it wasnt him fault....
2006-11-02 07:54:15 · update #3
You messed up here. Let him live his life. Don't contact him anymore.
2006-11-02 07:47:36 · answer #1 · answered by Conscious-X 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off, I'm a very sorry to hear that your mother is ill. Cancer or any other medical problem is never easy. For your pain, you have my condolences and my best wishes. Secondly, and more to the point of your question, the feelings of anger are not because he has feelings for you. He is angry because dumping him and then coming back to get together with him is a really bitchy thing to do and he should be pissed. Third, if he is with another girl what right do you have trying to get with him. Who cares if she is a rebound girl, if he is with someone you wait until they split before you move in. You may be a nice person but you really don't seem like it from what you are doing to this guy. If you are in love with this guy why did you dump him and why would you put your own longings above his happiness by putting his current happy relationship in jeopardy? My advice, though it comes late, is that you should be a friend to him and see if you can't earn a little bit of the trust back that you two have obviously lost. If there comes a time when you are both single and you have a good friendship, then by all means make a move on it. But right now, be a friend.
2006-11-02 08:00:09 · answer #2 · answered by Blue Abyss 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry to tell you this, but you need to live and let live on this one. You made a choice no matter what you were going through and you were cruel on top of it. If you really love him, you'll love him enough to let him heal and leave him alone. Love is not selfish and does not put your desires above the well-being of the other. If he comes to you on his own, then cheers, go for it, but unless or until that happens, leave him be.
Also, I'm sorry to hear your mother is ill and that you've been through such a difficult time. Do yourself a favor and spend some time on your own praying or going to a counselor or talking with a good girlfriend about these things to help you cope. God bless.
2006-11-02 08:00:42 · answer #3 · answered by Kelly S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How can you still be in love with him if you were so cruel to him three months ago. I do not blame him for not going back with you because when you get fed up you will do it all over again. You liked the power of him being so upset and when he found someone else you did not like it. Think why you packed him up in he first place that will not have changed. Let him be.
2006-11-02 07:52:42 · answer #4 · answered by Kirks Folley 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW. heavy stuff. u are a VERY confused girl. why did u break up with him in the first place if u LOVE HIM sooo much? that was dumb. and now after 3 month's have passed you've found out that being single isn't workin for u so u wanna just pick up where u left off with him? i think u should leave him the hell alone and figure out what u REALLY want. focus on takin care of your mom and stop lookin for him to be a crutch. were u there for him to lean on when u dumped him and stopped takin his calls and texts? why don't u back off from him and let him decide whether your worth another shot.
2006-11-02 07:50:50 · answer #5 · answered by feetal2003 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
leave him alone and stop using him. you are also hurting the other girl and she doesn't deserve it. yes of course he still loves you but it's out of pity and you need help more professional than him. you are in need of serious help and this isn't how to make yourself strong and well again. let him get on with his life or you'll damage him forever. get your own support network and put this behind you. yes you've been through some awful stuff and he understands and knows you best but it will get worse and you'll turn into the psycho ex. don't be a bunny boiler and respect yourself. life is just so tough but you won't grow by clinging to someone who is drowning. love him enough to let him go and love yourself enough to grow. good luck..i really do sympathise but I'm also with a man who's ex is doing this to him and it's so horrible to have to comfort him when she hurts him again.
2006-11-02 08:02:18 · answer #6 · answered by minerva 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You broke up with him and now you want him back?
If I were him I run and RUN FAST AND FAR. Look the reasons you broke up with him are still there. Move on to someone else and let the poor guy get on with his new life without you.
He's got a new girl and you want to break them UP, what would you do it she decided to make a play for him. If you really want him back wait for him to break up the the new girl first, then ask nicely if you two can date. Other then that move on.
2006-11-02 07:51:25 · answer #7 · answered by Richard 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is such a typical problem but thank goodness my boyfriend agreed to get back with me, it took a lot of persuasion and trust building because i had knocked him so far as i got with another lad and as much as he wanted to get back with me his main fear was that i would change my mind again and dump him again. But I realised that he was the only one that i wanted and that i had made a huge mistake so i convinced him of the same and now we are more solid than ever. Make sure that you really do want him back and its not just because hes with someone else. and if you really do want him back then convince him of that. Best of luck.
2006-11-02 07:52:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
You need to let the guy go! You only want him because someone else has him, when you have him again you won't want him anymore! Leave him alone and let him heal with his rebound girl.
2006-11-02 07:47:04 · answer #9 · answered by Flower Girl 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you need to move on with your life. You made a decision in the first place to not have him as your boyfriend and so he moved on with this life. My biggest suggestion would be to let it go. If it is meant to be he will come back to you.
2006-11-02 07:48:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
so......what's ur Q? U can't MAKE ur ex come back. If he still loves u and wants u just tell and show him that u need him there. If he cmes cos u need him then he will. If he doesn't he's moved on. Give him time. GOOD LUCK!
2006-11-02 07:46:45 · answer #11 · answered by v.ballerr <3 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋