My co-worker was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease) at 45. ALS is a terrible disease that slowly disables a person's body while leaving the brain intact - trapped in a body-shaped prison. Death usually occurs within 4 years of diagnosis when the brain is unable to control the muscles necessary for respiration. My co-worker has a 13 year old daughter and was recently told he'll have to start using a wheel chair and get a feeding tube (throat muscles aren't working reliably any more). I feel terribly sad and "I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it. What words of encouragement can I give him to help him enjoy the last bit of time he has left (we're all atheists here, so please focus on life, not the possibility of an after-life). Thanks.
2006-11-02 07:39:46 · 11 answers · asked by Wonderland 3 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Other - Diseases
Any time a friend is going thru an extremely difficult time and you really don't understand what they are going thru because you have never been in their shoes, THERE ARE NO RIGHT WORDS!! If you have nothing to say - don't say it !! The best thing you can do is to let them know you care!! Be there when they need a shoulder to cry on - help in whatever way you can. Just to know your friend cares even if they don't understand means SO much!!
2006-11-02 07:49:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were atheist and it that situation...I would feel pretty hopeless. I'm not particularly religious, I guess just more spiritual. This may be a good time for him to discover some spirituality. Because, to be honest...if he doesn't believe there is anything after this and has ALS, there really aren't any word of encouragement. Any words that focus on life, are simply going to be depressing. My uncle died of ALS, there's nothing pretty about it. It's really a horrifying disease. I understand that you aren't looking for religious/spiritual comments, but my beliefs are such that this is this man's lesson in this life. If he is able to have complete acceptance for it, then he will be successful in this lifetime, and with this lesson. It will be something he will not have to repeat. Sorry if this wasn't what you are looking for, but it's all I've got.
2006-11-02 07:48:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be there for the person. If you always act nice, they aren't going to want to be around you because then you are being fake. All they really want is a friend, someone that will make them be happy and feel comfortable. For the family, ask every once in awhile if you can do anything for them.
2006-11-02 07:45:39 · answer #3 · answered by Lindsay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All that you can do is be there for him. Help him with his daughter, pick up his laundry, cook him dinner when you can...you would be amazed at how much the little things can mean to someone. Actions speak louder than words, so if you truly want to convey how you feel just lend a hand.
2006-11-02 07:42:52 · answer #4 · answered by The Nag 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just say "hey I am here for support" and leave it at that. Chances are everyone is going to be treating this person differently and wanting him to talk about it all the time. It will be nice for him to have at least one person who is treating him the same.
2006-11-02 07:50:32 · answer #5 · answered by Elle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a Christian I believe this body is a seed and it has to die in order to become the better and final form. Whatever it is that we become in heaven, it is better than this. I would talk to that person about their final destination and make sure that they have their affairs in order and confirm their beliefs.
God Bless you in the name of Christ!
2006-11-02 07:49:27 · answer #6 · answered by goodflgirl2k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you talk to them the way you normally would they appreciate that the most when they need help you offer it. I know from experience with alot of people that they just want to have a decent conversation not one that focuses on their illness. you can contact groups to help you understand more if you want. they should be in the front of your phone book. or listed in the newspaper. my prayers are with you and your friend and her family.
2006-11-02 07:44:17 · answer #7 · answered by christy 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry is about all you can say. There is nothing wrong with being sorry when someone is suffering (physically or mentally).
And I'm sorry you are atheists. You are going to be so surprised.
2006-11-02 07:50:53 · answer #8 · answered by Mache 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just carry on being friends and talk about things he wants to talk about. Try and be normal. Don't shy away or be embarrassed to be around him
2006-11-02 07:42:36 · answer #9 · answered by The Mad cyclist 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
http://www.evenbetternow.com/als.html
2006-11-02 07:49:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋