had a row with my bf. both of us did something wrong but not cheated or anything like that. just stupid stuff. thing is I'm still upset with him and i'm pushing it all down but seething inside. we've talked it through and now i have to let it go and move on. i'm driving friends and family mad with it. I want to get over it but how? Why am I holding on to this crap? I really lost my temper out of proportion to the 'crime' and made myself feel really ill. I'm still shocked about that too. I've not got like that with a fella since I was 20. I'm 40 now!
2006-11-02 07:14:50 · 14 answers · asked by minerva 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
men have that affect on us I'm 41 and sometimes my husband is sooooooooo hateful or is it just me maybe our patients isn't as good as 20 years ago.take a deep breath count to ten and let it go.good luck hun e mail me anytime you want to let of steam
2006-11-02 07:26:27 · answer #1 · answered by kitten6444 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simply this issue is not resolved and you need to deal with it before it eats away at your relationship.
It would have been easier if you'd been more specific, people discuss just about everything on here so there's nothing to be shy about.
If you get through the next few weeks it will come back the first time you have an argument, it will be the first weapon you will throw at each other.
You do need a little time apart to calm down so you can discuss this properly and be more focussed in dealing with it rather than the anger taking control of the discussion.
I also think you should repost and put us in the picture, anyone who makes fun is a moron and worth ignoring anyway.
You can't just let it go, emotions don't work like that and after being cheated on myself, i know this sort of thing (guessing similar )will not dissapear until it is fully dealt with.
2006-11-02 07:24:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel, I really do. I can't advise you on how to get over it, because I'm still carrying things around that happened years ago. Everyone tells me to deal with it and move on, or leave....but I can't seem to do either. I hold grudges for ages when it comes to men doing me wrong, and it doesn't matter how many times he can say sorry, it's my issue and for some reason I just can never get over these things.
I think time is a healer, but I could still have a blazing row over something that happened 5 years ago!
2006-11-02 07:20:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're 40? Well aren't you mature enough to let this go? Make yourself stop or you will push this man away. I'm only fifteen and even I don't act that childish. You say it's just stupid stuff? Then let it go and grow up! If you can't do that and it's bothering you that much then finish it with him. Holding on to past mistakes will get you and your realtionship nowhere.
2006-11-02 07:19:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
maybe you have other problems that are bothering you (not necessarily to your knowledge) that have made you blow up like this. try thinking down to the source of your emotions and working out the knots and tangles manually. i can tell you really want to let it go, and talking it through was a really good idea...sighing and letting it go isn't as easy as it's said to be, but with this kind of determination i know you'll do it. the trick is to loosen the knots at the base, instead of just pulling the string tighter trying to get them out. think deep and you'll find it, and then you'll be able to dig it out and it won't bother you anymore. good luck...i really hope it works out for you
2006-11-02 07:20:13 · answer #5 · answered by fireflower413 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you just talk about it calmly instead of getting and shouting out loud, ok
talk about it and just let go
and u suppose to already know what to do because you're 40
2006-11-02 07:29:11 · answer #6 · answered by sweetcherry4u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
either your a guilty person (you have a guilty conscience) or you still like/love the guy, either that or you werent ready to let go of what was there so maybe you 2 should get talking and see if you can work things out
2006-11-02 07:17:55 · answer #7 · answered by sacredlikefire 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are old enough to know that holding anger in will make you sick. If you are still mad, TELL HIM!!! If you don't you will only get more stressed out and start to feel resentment towards him.
2006-11-02 07:19:36 · answer #8 · answered by bttrfly0724 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Xanax
2006-11-02 07:37:02 · answer #9 · answered by misssomers 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you're angry because you're not taking ownership for the 'crime' - it's not him you're mad at but yourself.... you feel that you're old enough to know better but you did it anyway... first get a hold of yourself and think is it really him or me?!! good luck sounds like you need some soul searching....
2006-11-02 07:18:27 · answer #10 · answered by thenakats 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋