A woman walked into a tattoo parlour and asked the tattooist if he would put a picture of a turkey on her left buttock and a picture of Father Christmas and a raindeer on her right buttock.
Now the tattooist was used to the strangest requests but this was so unusual he had to ask why.
"Well," replied the woman, "My husband's always complaining that there's never anything to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas."
----------------
While his wife was still alive, the husband bought her a headstone engraved with the words "Here lies Doris, cold as usual."
The wife was so angry she immediately went out and got a headstone for him, with the words, "In memory of Fred, stiff at last."
---------------------
The local radio staion was doing a feature about life on isolated farms. They interviewed one such farmer and asked him whether it was true that people like him sha*g*d cattle, sheep, goats and chickens.
"WHAT!" roared the outraged farmer, "chickens!?!?"
2006-11-02 07:00:48 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LOL
2006-11-02 07:02:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hilarious Ones
1.Wife with a wild idea of satiating his hubbys unending hunger !!!
2. Wife showing her husband that she too can embarass him more than he could !
3.Farmer doing justice to every creature on the Farm
Ha Ha Ha......I like all of them..second being the favorite !!!
2006-11-02 07:12:04 · answer #2 · answered by Tickler 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please remember that you are not born with religion. Religion is a learned activity. However, sexual attractions are innate. You do not have to agree with your child's lifestyle, but as a parent, you should respect your child. If your son had been born with a mental disorder or with extreme intelligence that you did not understand, would you love him any less? If you believe that homosexuality is a choice that someone makes, then ask yourself to remember the EXACT date that you decided that you were attracted to the opposite sex. The God that I have learned about believes that all of His creations are "fearfully and wonderfully made"; BUT to pass judgment on one of God's creations is no more or less of a sin than any sin that you have decided that another is making.
2016-05-23 19:02:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I particularly liked the headstone one.
2006-11-03 08:37:32 · answer #4 · answered by bo nidle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like them fidgety!
An old lady was proud of being a virgin.Before she passed away,she gave strict instructions to the funeral director,regarding her headstone.She said"I want it to read:"Born as a virgin,lived as a virgin,died as a virgin."
When she died.the funeral director relayed the instructions to the men inscribing her headstone.But they were lazy,and instead of carving out the full inscription,they just wrote:"Returned unopened."
2006-11-02 21:56:18 · answer #5 · answered by the gunners 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hahahaha! That made for the best laugh I've had all day!!! Those were really funny. Thanx!
2006-11-02 07:17:42 · answer #6 · answered by dixie011406 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh right errr a he he he (nervously)i'm gonna go over here for a bit but ,wait and see my mate james will take care of you for the time being ,,,,,what hospital are you at,we'll come get tcha
2006-11-02 07:05:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought that was really funny and enjoyed that joke.
2006-11-03 23:56:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol those are all hilarious i liked the second one the best lmfao
2006-11-02 07:05:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
HA! Funny stuff!
2006-11-02 07:03:08 · answer #10 · answered by Tony M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the second one was funny
2006-11-02 07:03:27 · answer #11 · answered by rose_merrick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋