a man walks into the doctors wearing only clingfilm
the doctor says "i can clearly see your nuts"
2006-11-02 04:17:35 · 43 answers · asked by ploppy pants 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Computer Diagnosis
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
2006-11-02 04:23:33 · answer #1 · answered by JohnRingold 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Funny
2006-11-02 04:46:09 · answer #2 · answered by tati 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's probably the timing...
A man walks into the doctors office, wearing nothing but cling film.
He just stands there.
The doctor thoughtfully looks at him for a moment, and then says,
"I can clearly see you're nuts"
2006-11-02 04:23:16 · answer #3 · answered by SpeakingTruthinLove 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny... but might be more effective to say the man walks into a psychiatrist's office.
2006-11-02 04:19:39 · answer #4 · answered by MissJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps if it was the first time reading/ hearing the joke. But it's not that good to begin with, and only gets less funny the more you hear it.
2006-11-02 04:20:56 · answer #5 · answered by ildjb@sbcglobal.net 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cute
2006-11-02 04:19:12 · answer #6 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never heard that before.....was pretty good.
Hey JohnRingo......yours was pretty good. I have one similar about 2 guys at a bus depot and a fortune telling machine. I will tell that in a bit.
2006-11-02 04:32:08 · answer #7 · answered by kiako 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
on a scale from 1 to 10 I give it a 6.3840983 - I'm very accurate
2006-11-02 04:18:43 · answer #8 · answered by blackratsnake 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes funny nice short easy to remeber
2006-11-02 04:20:04 · answer #9 · answered by FINN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Made me smile. So yeah funny.
2006-11-02 04:19:01 · answer #10 · answered by Kamunyak 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋