I gave a lapdance to a paper clip because the voices in my head told me to?

Question

Pick the month (number) you were born in:
1-----I fell in love with
2-----I ate
3-----I smacked
4-----I sang to
5-----I gave my number to
6-----I murdered
7-----I shot
8-----I gave a lap dance to
9-----I choked on
10----I bitched out
11----I had sex with
12----I humped


Pick the day (number) you were born on:

1--------A homeless guy
2--------your mom
3--------a banana
4--------a fork
5--------a Mexican
6--------a gangster
7--------a hooker
8--------an ipod
9--------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------a goat
11-------my dog
12-------a ninja
13-------the computer
14-------my neighbor
15-------a football player
16-------myself
17-------a Jones soda
18-------a llama
19-------a pickle
20-------a stuffed animal
21-------a permanent marker
22-------my dad
23-------a condom
24-------my psychiatrist
25-------a policeman
26-------my brother
27-------my sister
28-------a baseball bat
29-------a DVD player
30-------a paperclip
31-------my cell phone

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:

White-------Because I was high.
Black-------Because I was drunk.
Pink--------Because I'm NOT homosexual.
Red---------Because the voices told me to.
Blue--------Because I'm sexy and I do what I want
Green-------Because I hate myself.
Purple------Because I'm naked.
Gray--------Because that's how I roll.
Yellow------Because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange------Because I hate my family.
Other-------Because that's how I roll.


Now put that in the subject line and send to all of your friends to make
them laugh too!!!

Answer 1

I murdered my psychiatrist because I am sexy and I do what I want.

Answer 2

I shot my dog because that's how I roll. However, I was wearing a blue and white stripy shirt so you could say that I shot my dog because I was high and I'm sexy and do what I want.

Answer 3

I murdered a homeless guy because the voices told me too and my partner gave his number to a jones soda because the voives told him too. Like it.

Answer 4

I shot the computer because I hate myself. Lol, so hilarious.

How about applying the same to you? What would yours be?

Answer 5

I had sex with a condom because I'm sexy and I do what I want!

Answer 6

i gave a lap dancer a banana because thats how i roll.

shite if my wife sees this she will kill me.

she thinks a gave up smoking
hahahahahahaha

Answer 7

I bitched out my neighbour because i'm sexy and I do what I want...

Answer 8

hi, well Thank you! i quite enjoyed working that out!

by the way happy birthday for 30th August! and i love your red top! lol xxxx

Answer 9

I hope it was a money paper clip
btw
I shot my father because I was drunk

Answer 10

Oh dear God....


I choked on a condom because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars.

*rolls my eyes*

Just my luck I'd get a nasty one! :o)