My 1 year old daughter refuses to eat and does not sleep during the day, plus she keeps waking up at night.?

Question

I am a very stressed out mother. My daughter has been a hand full since she was born and up till now she is 1 years old she is still the same. She refuses her food, times when she does eat I have to entertain her with different items that she finds facinating ie. plastic container with a lid that you can take off. She get's bored easily which means when she's bored with the item she refuses to eat again and then I will have to find something else to entertain her with. She does not like to try out different foods or won't even try. She will not eat any lumpy foods so therefore she is still eating purees. She does not sleep during the day, she can have a 30 minutes nap and then last till the end of the night but having said that she constantly wakes up at night times and most of the time she wants to be picked up. I am so stressed, this is my first child and believe me it has put me off forever with having another child. I need advice and I need help pls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 1

You can get help - you may feel too exhausted to ask for it, but keep trying. It turned out my son had food allergies that meant he associated eating with feeling unwell (he had reflux and it probably felt a bit like indigestion), so he didn't want to eat. We were helped by the Feeding Team at our local hospital who slowly introduced textures (not necessarily for eating, just to play with, get sticky and messy and then the grown ups would play with it too, get it on their hands and lots of pantomime 'yum yum!' stuff. Things like crackers with squeesy ketchup with hundreds and thousands and make messy patterns) Its important that the food is seen as fun and not threatening or to be used as a weapon ('if I don't eat I get lots of attention'). Its possible the sleep thing is due to hunger. Or she may be over tired and waking because of that , you could try more structured naps, maybe an hour in the morning and then from 1.30 - 2.30 pm, every day, don't forget it takes four days of trying to establish a new pattern, try to keep her wakeful after 4.00 pm or she may not sleep . Many of the children under the feeding team had problems with textures, not just of food, but walking on sand or grass or clothing discomfort. Some had 'tactile defensiveness'. There could be lots of reasons, no point in guessing, try your doctor or health visitor, get a referral, someone out there can help, you need sleep, you need to be able to remember that life is fun and that you will have fun again! Good luck

Answer 2

I took care of a little one from 2 months on who was exactly the way your describing and her mother was exactly the way you sound. I watched the little girl extra so she could look into having her tubes tied and this was her first. I kow this sounds like an impossible thing but try to relax your stress is probbaly the main reason for her behavior. Don't get me wrong it's not your fault your just being a good mom and worrying about your child but your daughter probably has a high strung nature which will serve her well in life and make her a go getter for now you need to concentrate on being a calming influence in her life. No child will starve themselves to death so don't stress the food. The sleeping may be a tough love thing she needs to understand you willl not go to her when she wakes. Calm down the enviroment nad take away the reward for getting up and she will soon learn to sleep although it may always be less than another child. Good luck!

Answer 3

Firstly it will get better!

With the eating puree don't worry about it just try foods that you can serve lumpy but can be mashed easily with a spoon and try it at different consultancies. e.g. Banana, Vegetable soup etc.

With the sleeping I have had trouble with my little girl with her daytime nap since she was born near enough she's just too nosey. Try a few different ways I can't guarantee anything but I've had some success with the baby whisperer's technique. I've also found that if my little girl sleeps during the day she doesn't tend to wake up at night.

Good luck, I know what you are going through, this is my only child too, and I've already been sterilised I'm NOT having another one!

Also, talk to your health visitor they are supposed to be there to help with you and your child.

Answer 4

I went through the same thing with my son. He would hardly ever eat anything! All he ever wanted was "boobs" and cheerios....He's five now and thriving! He is just now trying new foods and to this day I'm not making a big deal out of what he eats. I just offer healthy balanced meals and he either eats or he doesn't! Don't feel guilty! Millions of parents are going through the same thing and I'm sure you are a terrific mother! One thing I would recommend for the sleeping issue is more exercise, I have tested that theory many times and you just gotta run em' hard and they'll sleep!! : ) I waited four years between my boys and it gets easier as they get older....Don't give up on having more just yet! Hang in there!

Answer 5

Stop worrying. My son was the same. He never slept, not during the day and only for 2 hour bursts at night. He started to calm down when he went to school!!! If she doesn't eat, she's obviously not hungry, my son ate little and often. I just made sure I gave him good food when he was hungry (pureed fruit was easiest to get down him). He now eats the most unusual foods for a nine year old (stilton cheese, squid, anything in garlic). As long as she's not wasting away, try not to worry. Also, if you're stressed she WILL pick up on it and react. Spend your time together having fun and learning. It'll be ok in the end. Honest.

Answer 6

hi, i am glad that i have seen this question, and don;t worry this is normal. i went through the same with my first although whether first, 2nd or 3rd they can all be the same so rest assured that this is definatley NOT your fault. first off with regards to eating, so what if she will only eat puree food, thats fine and if you need to keep feeding her from jars then so be it, anything for an easy life, she is only 1 and also i used to put a high chair in the livingroom on a mat and give my daughter all different fingers foods, a good thing for soft food is couscous, just plain and you can put tuna or ham, peas, anything in it and it is like a puree.

Daytime nap: my daughter would only go for a nap if i would so i would lay down for 2 hours everyday with her, sometimes just till she went to sleep and people who say you shouldn;t be doing that as it is getting them into a bad habit don;t have kids!! my daughter is now 5 and goes to bed herself in her own room so seize the moment i say, if she doesn;t nap then don;t ben too worried, if you drive go on a drive for about 20 mins with heater on!!

During the night, I must admit i didn;t have a problem with during the night, how often does she wake as maybe picking her up and putting her in your bed, i had to do this for 6 months, but anything for a peaceful night, whats the harm, your not on your own beleive me i have been through this and i know what i am taking about.
good luck

Answer 7

I have a one year old boy and your daughter sounds exactly the same as my son except I have to entertain him watching telly and I have to put him in his old car seat just to be fed. He still wakes at night and cries I used to wake up every time he does that.Eventually my husband told me I'm spoiling him too much because my other son whose 10 year old was not like that at all. so my husband told me I'm growing up the baby in a wrong way by keep on going to him whenever he cries. These past two weeks whenever he has been crying I don't go to him he sleeps on his own. I have been less stressed, I work during the day. So you'll see you not being cruel at all by not going to her every time she cries, she will eventually get used to it just like my baby and sleep on her own. I hope this helps you and good luck.

Answer 8

First of all it will get better And try some stress busting techniques that can include your daughter like a walk.Fresh air gets everybody hungry and it can get kids get a bit worn out.Get your daughter involved in play groups.Most times when kids see other kids doing stuff they follow which also includes eating.
When it is bed time make your home environment conducive to sleep and you can try things like porridge that induces comfort like feelings to get her off.Hope this helps

Answer 9

If you want to put your baby to sleep in 20 seconds you must get the "Instant Baby Sleep" MP3 sound track. Here is their official web-site: http://www.instantbabysleep.net

The sound track gently produces energy over the full human hearing spectrum with an embedded pulse that gently eases the brain to the Alpha state well known for drowsiness and sleep induction.

Answer 10

Its normal so don't worry. But to get her to sleep at night give her alot of surgar yes she will be really hiper for about thirty minutes but then she will get a sugar high and fall right asleep. As for the other things you might want to get her a spoon that is really intresting like one that glows or changes color that way she will want to put it in her mouth you just have to put food on it.