Are there any returned vets who can give me advice. The situation is difficult because the relationship between my brother and I has been frought with much conflict for as many years as I can remember.
He's different since he has come back. The last time I saw him he was so haggard looking. I know for a fact that asking him all kinds of questions about Iraq is not what he needs, and that if he wants to talk about it let him, but don't force him.
But I guess I'm trying to ask if there is any advice on how I can best be there for him. What did you (returned vets) want from your family when you returned?
I can't see treating him like I used to, and I don't think that would be fair. He is a different person. He has visibly changed, and to deny that would be wrong, imo.
I'm not making much sense I realize, but am I making enough?
2006-11-01 16:39:20 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Military
Call the Veterans Administration and find out what programs they have available for helping vets who are struggling and write that information down.
Tell your brother that you love and are concerned about him. Give him the information that you have obtained from the VA. Encourage him to contact them for help. Tell him that you will do whatever you can for him, if he needs help.
You can put it in writing if you have difficulty talking to him. Meet with him and give him your note and ask him to let you know if he wants to talk.
2006-11-01 17:26:06 · answer #1 · answered by KIT J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to show him your unconditional love and support. That is what he needs now. Now is the time to be healing old wounds and coming closer together. I wouldn't be asking him much about what went on over there. However, if he brings it up or seems eager to talk about it, be a caring and understanding ear and let him vent. Be not only a sister, but a friend. Hug him, tell him how proud you are that he is your brother. Good luck and God bless, and thank your brother for his service to our country.
2006-11-01 16:52:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to cut the old way of hate and conflict by having a heart to heart talk with him. Let him know that you want to let by-gones be by-gones. Then as a sister start developing trust with him. You cannot support him if he doesn't trust you. Show him you love him without being overbearing and judgmental.
2006-11-01 16:49:12 · answer #3 · answered by tofu 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Good luck helping your brother!
You can only do so much and the rest is up to him.
I'm sorry he seems so different now.
Hopefully time will heal his wounds and your relationship.
2006-11-01 16:42:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋