should I ask certain relatives not to kiss my children on the lips? I know there are ones that I'd rather not be near my children at all, but what should I say? The children's grandparents always kiss on the lips. It's just a quick little peck, but I worry about viruses. How can I tell certain relatives it's ok and others it's not. I would rather all relatives kiss on the cheek, but how do I tell them without starting WWIII !!!! Am I being silly for even asking?
2006-11-01 15:03:32 · 17 answers · asked by Jennie 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
that is kinda creepy,, I love my son, and I've never done that, and I gave birth to him. If you're children are old enough, they themselves can set limits, to which completely eliminates WWIII, by as another poster suggests turning a cheek. I have 0 relatives, distant and close who do this to me or my family/children. Not only (as you pointed out) is it a hygenic issues, it's creepy. I guess if it came down to it, I'd defend my position as mom, and inform anyone that is can be misconstrued as inappropriate behavior, (though I'm not suggesting an idle quick peck, but it's still a social discomfort), and let them know that I'd prefer a loving peck more.
You're decision over these issues should not rest on making "others" comfortable, but about protecting and informing appropriate social behaviors with your own children. I'd perhaps make up, or bring up a subject, such and include them in your latest discovery, (it's all just to get them to see your viewpoint), but can be disguised as such... "oh (family), Little billy learned about germs today at preschool, and how we should give kisses on the cheek so we dont' catch colds, and viruses, and germs from one another.. .or if the child is young, you can casually bring this up for conversation,, or suggest that you've noticed your child being sick and wondering how to eliminate this problem, so you can opt for no more mouth kisses,, and spread the "word".. I know you are trying to play devil's advocate, and be a good parent, and not fluff feathers, so I hope this works. My best!
2006-11-01 15:18:21 · answer #1 · answered by Manatee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, thats not right, your family is your family, but kissing your children on the lips is a little to far, and its nomal to worry about illnesses from things like that.
I'm 15, I know, and I don't wan't kids, but I'm very good with them, and I get worried too with things like that(I'm the oldest of all the grandchildren and the yroungest and I are very close to one-and-other, where each-others' Turd, lol)
I think you could start just by asking the grandparents to "not" 'peck' them on the lips when they(or the children) are sick. And just slowly work off of that :)
Good Luck 0:)
2006-11-01 15:20:32 · answer #2 · answered by †Triptych† 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no you are not, when I was young my grandfather kissed me on the lips and later found out he was a child abuser just like my father was. So, it's really not about getting germs or viruses, it's about that. Tell you children to throw their cheek out when someone leans in. My last name is now Cheek, and I hate being attack by older in laws so I say since I am a Cheek now kiss me on my cheek. This will make your child feel insecure growing up. Tell the Grandparents that the child has mono..lol, jk, but just tell the child to turn the head away and throw the cheek out.
2006-11-01 15:27:03 · answer #3 · answered by fourcheeks4 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you are not I just asked this question the other day.They can either like it or not but there is too much going around and small children dont have a great enough immune system to fight off certain germs.Ask them to not do it politely.It should go for all until your children can understand.Or make a comment to that person you dont want.Like "Oh my gosh Susie kiss the baby in the mouth and I was so disgusted! Germs are bad I HATE! when people do it period."Hahah this works for me all the time.She will then get the hint that you dont like it and start kissing other places like the forehead.Say I dont mind places like that but the mouth oh no!She will get the hint.
2006-11-01 15:19:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
viruses yes!, you as parent have the right to tell each relative that you wish no more kissing on the lips.
Or you could tell them your child has a desease (just invent something)
Or you could teach and train your kids not to let anybody kiss their lips, only mummy and daddy.
Eventually, they'll get the point, and they shouldn't be kissing on the lips either, that's gross!
2006-11-01 16:31:36 · answer #5 · answered by Sabine 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand your concerns...and no, you are not being silly. However, my response would be to pick your battles carefully. Do you really want your children to be alienated by their family because of something that makes you uncomfortable?... that's what will happen. Thank goodness that your children have family members that love them enough to show affection and a genuine interest in them. Most importantly, does the kissing make your children uncomfortable? Answer that question and you will find your solution of whether to pursue this further. Finally, how should you go about asking them not to kiss if that's what you decide..."very carefully."
2006-11-01 15:22:17 · answer #6 · answered by s019451 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I have a 16 month old and I don't let anyone kiss her on the lips but my husband and me ( my hubby doesn't do it though). We set that as a rule from day 1. We just didn't feel comfortable with anyone else doing it. You're not silly.
2006-11-01 15:21:38 · answer #7 · answered by Melissa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The next time they visit just tell them that with flu season coming you are concerned for THEM as well as your kids. Ask them nicely if they could just kiss them on the cheek and give them a big hug.Making it seem as though you are concerned about everyone will make it easier. Tell them kids are exposed to so many germs and you want everyone to stay healthy this winter.
2006-11-01 15:18:37 · answer #8 · answered by thrill88 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them that the doctor said it would better not to let your child get kisses on the lips since flu season is coming up.
2006-11-01 15:47:01 · answer #9 · answered by Dana J 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no you are not being silly your being careful i have my family kiss my kids on the cheek because of the same reason so just tell everyone to kiss on the cheek so that way you don't hurt any ones feelings.
2006-11-01 17:56:56 · answer #10 · answered by littleangelof5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋