Ok so me and my boyfriend was talking about strippers and he said he was gonna have one at his bachelor party i dont know i just dont feel confortable with a stripper dancing for my boyfriend his brother and bestfriend and my brother is gonna be their but to me it just feels wrong am i wrong for thinking this way, i know he wont cheat on me and i dont wanna sound jelous or not trusing of him. Do all guys have a stripper b4 they get married?? Please help
2006-11-01 09:57:14 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He said his mom is gonna get me a stipper lol he does act like its a tradition he said its his last night as a free man.
2006-11-01 10:02:39 · update #1
He feels that he's supposed to have a stripper not out of disrespect to me but just to have a bachelor party
2006-11-01 10:43:18 · update #2
Lots of people will tell you that having a stripper is "no big deal." If this is the case, then there's no need to have one.
This is how I explain why strippers are unacceptable:
Men and women are aroused by different things to different degrees. Women are not aroused by seeing males strip and dance in the same way that men are aroused by seeing women do the same. For women, that kind of arousal comes from more intimate interaction, touching, making out. Ask your boyfriend how he would feel about you making out with someone? About you being very aroused by a complete stranger in this way? Wouldn't he be uncomfortable with the thought? I would even venture to say that he'd consider it cheating. And maybe thinking about the situation in this way would help him understand why it makes you so uncomfortable.
Honestly, if he's willing to sacrifice your comfort and go against your wishes (no matter how unconventional or uncool they are), I think you may want to question his maturity level or readiness for the level of commitment that marriage requires. He should show you more respect.
2006-11-01 12:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by absnyc 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It may be a "tradition" in certain circles. I have never known anyone personally who had a bachelor party with a stripper. If he's in a relationship with you, he isn't a "free man". If I heard that my husband-to-be was going to need a stripper before he got married - I would kick him to the curb right then and there. I'm simply not interested in marrying a guy with a pre-adolescent mentality.
2006-11-01 12:00:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Personally, I've never had a private party with a stripper...but I've been to strip clubs as part of a bachelor party.
Two points for your boyfriend for telling you.
Suggest to him that you would prefer that the party be 1) held at a local club and 2) everyone in his party have a limo service to drive them to/from the party so they can get loaded without getting busted for drunk driving.
Also, be sure to tell him that you and your girlfriends will also be having a party where a male stripper will be performing various and sundry acts, just for the girls!
2006-11-01 10:01:24 · answer #3 · answered by docscholl 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Strippers have really gone out of fashion, thank goodness. It's way old school. Tell your boyfriend you are not happy with the idea, and if he respects you he will not do so. There are plenty of guys who get together for their bachelor parties and just hang out and be "boys".
Just make sure your bachelorette party is clean, too!
2006-11-01 13:49:32 · answer #4 · answered by Lydia 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I totally know what you mean about feeling uncomfortable with it... I am not a jealous woman, but as another poster stated... my man looking at another nearly-naked woman?? Duh!... of course I would be uncomfortable!
To ease this though, get the "other side of the story".... remember that the stripper is just doing a job like any other... she is likely not going to let any of the men "have their way with her" and she is the entertainment... period. It may be hard to say that this form of entertainment is acceptable (Lets face it if any woman not EMPLOYED as a stripper stripped for your man you'd be downright livid!... I know *I* would be!), and if someone were to get a male stripper for my bachelorette I KNOW I would walk out.... but the bottom line is, if you trust your man, dont worry about the stripper thing.... its more or less the best man's idea of what "should" be at a bachelor party and he doesnt want to disappoint.
2006-11-01 11:08:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
in my view, i think of it incredibly is a bad thought. you should think of on the subject of the atmosphere that she is in, and how she makes her funds-- no longer that she is a bad individual, yet she hasn't made very smart selections, and stripping isn't conducive to relationships interior the long-term-- in some unspecified time interior the destiny one spouse or the different needs the stripper to "quit" stripping, and then the stripper feels as though the guy is attempting to regulate them-- and then it is going to become a administration situation, and a believe situation, and in case you do locate out you rather like this individual, you know you do no longer want the guy you like showing their bare physique to different adult men/women persons each time, much less for a "job"-- there are different counsel on a thank you to make funds, and that's a self admire and self-worth situation-- interestingly she likes the attention and funds-- in spite of the indisputable fact that it should not be sturdy for sher existence later-- sh ewill alays carry the stigma of being a "stripper" even while and if she stops. do you opt to handle that?
2016-10-21 02:49:25 · answer #6 · answered by lorentz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but it kinda is a tradition to get a stripper.
Personally if my moth-in-law , or any one else got me a stripper I would just leave. Let them pay the money for something they wanted . I think it is gross, taking advantage of the stripper.
2006-11-01 10:46:37 · answer #7 · answered by ee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i know what u mean. my bf goes to strip clubs on occasion. but i'll be honest with you it's not that bad. true...it makes me uncomfortable a lil too. i mean it's a naked woman in front of ur man right?! i know what u mean. but have u ever been in a strip club. i have n it's really not so bad. i have spoke to a lot of the girls in the one i went to and they r all really nice but half of them don't even like men. some r gay, bi, or some just think men r plain stupid. most of them are far from interested in average guys anyway. the one's i know go for guys with MONEY. n lots of it. thats the whole point it's all a tease. there is usually not any feeling involved. i understand how u feel about being jealous cuz i would be too. n when my bf has a bachelor party one day i will feel odd too. but go out with the girls and have ur party! let ur bf enjoy his party. u should be able to trust him n if not maybe marriage is the wrong idea. i am sure he just wants to have a fun get together with all the guys b4 his wedding n just enjoy one last night a free man. (not meaning he can do hanky panky with whoever). tell him u r nervous about it but u trust him. and i have a feeling it won't be so bad! good luck!
2006-11-01 10:09:43 · answer #8 · answered by playboyprincess6904 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I can't believe how many of the girls who responded are totally cool with it!!! I thought for sure more would be opposed to it.
To be honest, I don't agree with the whole stripper thing; especially the little verse about "last night being a free man." C'mon, the last night I hope he was a free man was the night before he started going out with you!!! I didn't want my husband to have one either and him AND his friends completely honored and respected that. It is not right that your fiance has to go look at other naked girls when he should be excited about seeing you!
2006-11-01 10:26:57 · answer #9 · answered by CC88 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
NO WAY, NO HOW! thats how I feel about my man getting a stripper for his bachelor party! I told him if he does the wedding will be off! My argument? Simple. Women in the US are still second class citizens. Equality in America is looming, but we arent quite there. Why not? well in part because there are women out there like these strippers who permit men to continue to treat women as though they are flesh for the sexual gratification of men. I think this objectification of women is disgusting!
2006-11-01 10:30:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 2⤋