my two girls refuse to clean their room,I try to reward them but they still refuse,I get mad or punish, NADA!?

Question

They just refuse to clean their room,I need some help....

Answer 1

When I was little my mom told my sister and me that if we didn't clean it she would. Well we didn't and she did. She came in with a big trash bag and everything that was touching our floor went. She told us that in order for us to own stuff we had to respect how lucky we was to have it and take care of it. After that we took mom more serious. I have also heard of taking everything out of the room but the bed, pillow and blanket and then the child has to earn back their stuff. But some times taking a toy an hour until it is done dose the trick. Watch on giving to many rewards. Reward only after they have been doing it on their own for awhile with no fight. Because they need to understand that when they are grown and on their own that no one is going to give them a treat every time they do dishes, pay bills and take care of their selves. You being proud of them might be enough reward, so make sure you tell them. They will put up a fight but stick to what ever you decide to do. They will learn that you deserve their respect. My mom stuck to her word every time and I fought, but I learned to respect her and she showed me respect. She even stuck in there when I was a teen. Thank god because I got the point . Now she is not just my mom , she is my best friend. We are on the phone every night. So hang in there. Good luck.

Answer 2

Listen, trust me, i'm 12 and the same thing happens to me! My mom will do anything to get me to clean but i just won't listen so latley she has been coming into my room without a word with a clean garbage bag and picking up my toys, cloths, books and all.... i was surprised its not till 4 weeks later i got everything back because i started behaving now my mom never has problems with me and my sis trust me..... even i have to give my mom a little credit for that!

when my mom is done she says its garbage and hides it.... even though i had almost no cloths to wear becasue my mom had them all then i worked and i learned my lesson!

Answer 3

they are kids how do they refuse? i have a child who will clean her room but its always a real crappy job so i have to go in there every day and point out all the little messes and piles she left on the floor and under the bed...the first question is how important is it to you that they clean their room and how important is it to you that they listen to you when you tell um to do something? if you dont feel this topic is worth the fight then leave it alone...but if its important then you need to find some things that will motivate them to pick up instead of trying to reward when they do pick up because like you said they flat out refuse...my mom use to bag up anything left out of place and put it in her closet...usually i never missed it but when i did notice it was gone i would have to earn it back by doing a chore she needed done...myself i just dont let my child out of the room till the job is done right so its her choice to sit in her room till bed time or get it done nicely and quickly...depending on the mood she is in there are good days and bad days

Answer 4

Go to your local Walmart or Target and purchase a large laundry basket. Explain to your children that once a week you will be coming into their room to "shop" for what ever they have left on the floor. Go in with the laundry basket and pick up everything that they have left out. Once you have done that set the basket in a place where they can see it and it is not in your way. In order for them to "purchase" their stuff back, they will have to make sure their room is ready for their new "purchases". Go back and "shop" once a week. Watch your basket get emptier and emptier each week. Stay strong. Do not let them have their stuff back until they have earned enough to purchase it. (clean room)

Answer 5

Sounds like its time for consequences. If they don' clean up the room...you have to be tough and start taking the toys away. In order for them to get the toys back...they have to keep the room clean.

Answer 6

First off how old are the girls? Second why would you reward them if it is something they are suppose to do? Depending on how old they are I would go in there rooms when they are at school and trash them. Then lets see how they react when they get home. Just a thought. Good luck

Answer 7

You know what....I would leave them to it. Otherwise you're gonna spend hours and hours nagging and nagging until they leave home. Not good for you and not good for them.

I never nagged mine to tidy their rooms, because I was really nagged at home ( and it was a waste of time), but what I find is that they get the room into a mess, then they can't stand it anymore and tidy it without being asked.

Just close their bedroom door so you don't have to look at it and tell them you're not going to remind them to clean their room anymore.

Tons more peace in the house, tons less stress for everyone, a little more mess but then they learn to be responsible.

Answer 8

depending on their age.... apparently they thinkthey are beyond the rules of the house.... it's the "it's MY room" - sure it is kid - when you start paying rent! literally make them then pay rent and as long as it's nothing that can grow (mild fungus) they can leave the room however they like! save the money for new capreting adn walls when they are old enough adn move out - you'll need to fumigate.

the other is the option that worked on me.... my biggest think were things not being put in order. my mom threatened two things.... she was going to start picking up what what lying around and i wouldn't get it back AND then, she was going to clean it for me - top to bottom - drawers closets - EVERYTHING - sure didn't want her going through my notes from the boys and other stuff.....

good luck with the girls!!!

Answer 9

You don't reward kids for something they are supposed to do. Well, it sounds like you waited too late to ask this question. If no kinds of punishment seems to work for you, you're in trouble. Maybe the belt will help this situation.

Answer 10

Please tell me why are trying to reward them for something they are suppose to do. They don't work or pay bills the least they could do is go to school get good grades and clean their room. Put them sisters on punishment. Confine them to their messy room taking away anything that entertains them such as tv, radio, video game, phone etc. Let them know Until they do want they are suppose to do, they can't do what they want. All else fails pull out the BELT!