my girl, for some strange reason, doesnt like skin to skin contact anymore when we get close. like, i'll try to put my hand down up her skirt and she'll keep moving it away from her crotch to a completely different area. it never used to be like this. i'll suggest sex, and it's pretty clear we both want it but she never goes through with it. she likes to dry hump instead. and then when she's all satisfied, she just leaves me hard, sometimes telling me i hafta go cuz her parents will be home soon.
i love to please her, but she's not letting me. i dont want to ask cuz i think id ruin any type of sex that we could possibly have for a while. we havent had sex in months. any ideas on why shes acting like this? am i the problem somehow?
2006-11-01 08:03:08 · 16 answers · asked by sh8dybrady120 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe she's interested in the emotional and mental connection instead of the physical/sexual one. Not saying she's not interested in sex. But when's the last time you've bought her flowers for no apparent reason, or you bought her a candy bar that she had just casually mentioned being her favorite once just because you were missing her? Rented or borrowed or just plain watched her favorite chick flick without gagging just because she wanted to watch it? Called her just because you missed her like crazy and just wanted to talk about absolutely nothing? Asked how her day was?
It should never be about sex. Now I'm not saying that that's all you want from her, nor am I saying that's all that's on your mind. But if you love her, the most important thing to you should be making her happy.
Relationships have different stages. The first stage is infatuation. You want sexual contact, and you want it bad. You're also trying to get to know each other. In the second stage, you're still wanting to get to know each other, but sexual contact is taking second place to this. Not saying the sexual contact desire is dying, but it's not as important as getting familiar and comfortable with each other. In the third stage, you are getting comfortable around each other, and starting to learn most of everything you need to know about each other. You'll never fully learn everything - but you gotta look for the stuff to learn.
But try cuddling with her once in a while. No sex as a reward type cuddling. Just enjoy each others company. Make her feel loved.
And most importantly: don't be afraid to ask her. Just don't go at asking her in an accusatory way. That just puts her on the defensive. And be loving and nice when you ask.
2006-11-01 08:24:39 · answer #1 · answered by poochieis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no of course ur not the problem(well, if except u are). what if u'd ruin any type of sex that u could possibly have? doesn't matter. maybe she's upset about something, or she has a lot in her mind. don't be scared to ask, becoz telling the truth means knowing the truth, and when u know the truth, u know wat could happen? absolutely anything. the truth takes u anywhere u want 2, even the bathroom for god's sake. if it doesn't work out, check this out, there's only one of u and a million of other girls that are free, ur type, ur age, and likes u. don't waste ur tym on something u don't like or care about bcoz it would hurt the other person 2 know ur love was all fake
that would be unfair, wouldn't it be?
i did not know what i just typed so good luck
2006-11-01 16:13:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, part of a relationship in which sex is appropriate involves the ability to communicate. If you don't have that, then I wouldn't worry about it. You have to start from a mature standpoint for things to work.
Second, pregnancy and STD issues are of utmost importance. Any fears she has may be making her change the routine.
What would you tell her parents if she had your kid or caught your undiscovered STD?
Good reason to hold off, no?
I hope my 12-yr-old son thinks that way...
2006-11-01 16:06:57 · answer #3 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe something happen to her and she didn't tell you. Sometimes its just nice to talk to her for a while. Write a poem or song about her and remind her how you feel about her. Don't be all just there for some action. Do some very sweet stuff. Talking to her won't ruin anything. She'll find it very sweet that your there to listen and talk. Kiss her on the forehead. Good luck!
2006-11-01 16:08:53 · answer #4 · answered by Katie M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is worried about her parents coming home maybe you two are too young to be having sex. That could be what she is thinking, you need to talk to her though and respect her decision if she decides she isnt ready for anything more than what you are doing now.
2006-11-01 16:08:38 · answer #5 · answered by melly1023 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not to freak you out, but...
It sounds like maybe she feels like she's been violated- probably not by you, but maybe someone else in her life? Ask her calmly if you've ever done anything to make her uncomfortable with you touching her. If she says no, then ask her if someone else has hurt her. If she says no again, back off and give her her space. I'm sure the truth will come out eventually.
2006-11-01 16:08:06 · answer #6 · answered by Jennifer F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both sound young and it also sounds as if she is just not ready yet. She also sounds like she likes her cake and the cherry on top. Just talk to her about it and find out what she is thinking. That is how you will get to the bottom of it.
2006-11-01 16:09:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you are the problem sorry to say but she sounds nuts or she is cheating on ou or something I don't know that is a first I have never heard of that in my life but I can assure you it is her not you
2006-11-01 16:10:38 · answer #8 · answered by Jen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think maybe she is just thinking seriously about becoming pure she doesn't want to ruin anythang maybe she doing those true love waits thing are something.
2006-11-01 16:07:51 · answer #9 · answered by ambular 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not trying to scare you, but is it possible she has an std and too scared to tell you?
If she is dry humping you, then you know shes attracted to you. Its def. not you!
2006-11-01 16:10:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋