He has lied, been caught, been remorseful. He was coming off of a really bad break up with an ex that he loved when we met. She cheated and moved on. He has moved on but was hurt pretty badly. It took him awhile to commit to a relationship with me and while "getting there" was seeing someone else briefly. I found out. He was adament that he want me and didn't want to lose me just wasn't ready for a committed relationship. He has since committed to a future with me and I know he cares/loves me. He has put up with a lot of crap from me (invading his privacy in search of the truth, weekly fights about my suspicions, and a whole lot of sarcastic accusations). Not that he doesn't deserve it. I have said I want to work on it and get past it. I am trying and he is being patient. Did I mention he is still friends with the one he was seeing which sends me. She has confirmed that they are just friends and is fact seeing someone else. Is there hope or am I just hopeful?
2006-11-01 06:55:30 · 11 answers · asked by Hopey 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There's hope. He was hurt and I believe he probably wasn't ready to love or trust again. You should get over it, give him a second chance. He was betrayed and hurt very badly by his ex, and he just probably wasn't thinking straight. If he does it again, end it... but from what you say it sounds to me like he deserves a second chance.
2006-11-01 07:00:20 · answer #1 · answered by * 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible if you remeber that you have to forgive him and let it go. Forgiveness is a choice not a feeling. My husband I have been married nine years. We have 4 children and 1 on the way. He cheated on me and left me for another woman for 3 of these pregnancies. We reconciled and are living happily. It's not always easy because now that I'm pregnant again, I get parranoid that he's going to leave again. But I have found that through Jesus we can make this work. I trust Jesus not my husband. But I have forgiven him and I don't dwell on the past. That will kill your relationship. If those thoughts come up then you need to remind yourself that he's with you. He chose you. What happened before can not be changed, so concentrate on the here and now and the future. If you can't see yourself ever getting past it and truly forgiving him so that you're not invading his privacy and always seeking the truth, then you should consider moving on. It will just hurt you more and him too. Hope I've helped.
2006-11-01 07:10:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not going to work...ever. Let me tell you why. You are setting yourself up for a lifetime of heartache because as long as she is in the picture you will forever have doubts (as would any woman). Why is she still in the picture? How can his heart ever heal (so he can devote it to you) if she is still around being a constant reminder of what they had? And lets be real, if he is still allowing her ti linger around after she cheated on him then obviously he still has feelings for her. And how long do you think its going to actually take before she and the guy she is seeing suddendly start having problems and she runs to you b.f for comfort. Then one thing will lead to another and then there you are wondering how did this happen. Don't do this to yourself, please. Tell him that as long as she is there, you can't be. He needs to make a choice. If he does that then you will see where his heart truly lies (with you or her). Good luck, sweetie.
2006-11-01 07:07:35 · answer #3 · answered by shellese2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to work on you. You have trust issues. do you know how to work on yourself? If you do not, then you need help. Since you know their is a problem, do what ever you have to do to get your life straighten out! Why don't the two of you, sit down and, talk, find out what you want out of this relationship? Figure out how the two of you are going to work on making it better. Now if you want this to work, you are the ones who has to work to make this relationship wholesome, and strong! be honest with each other. If this is what you want, you have to make it work.
2006-11-01 07:17:13 · answer #4 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think you are just hopeful. Pain and deceit is hard to get past. If you really love him and really trust him, then it wouldn't be a problem. But, somehow I don't see that in what you wrote.
2006-11-01 06:59:04 · answer #5 · answered by GirlinNB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think there is hope but there is still room just to be hopeful. Because woman hope that there significant other is being true and honest.
2006-11-01 07:02:39 · answer #6 · answered by Ty 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
treat others as you would like to be treaten, is he has given you reason not to trust him, then dont! men take advantage of women who show signs of weakness, keep him on his toes! if you know he is cheating, then move on. You can find another man who will adore you, and not cheat on you!
2006-11-01 07:03:06 · answer #7 · answered by angie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he truly loves you, he wouldnt do anything to hurt you. His only aim would be to make you happy and help you succeed in life. Maybe it's imitation love...is that what you truly want?
2006-11-01 06:58:14 · answer #8 · answered by ***MAF*** 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there. i've got not conquer it completely, yet I did controlled to get lower back on the right music with my life. one element that helped replaced into the reality that i do no longer see them popular (being away to college in yet another city) :D yet another element that helped me plenty replaced into examining self-enhance books and listening to different seminars in this topic. i've got additionally gotten in touch in an multilevel marketing corporation and that i've got been going to their seminars, taalking to my sponsor... stuff like that.. you need to discover effective people and collect them around you... attempt wathing the action picture "the secret", or "what the bleep do all of us know", or some motivational video clips, like "the bob group"... you need to discover out for your self, that what others say concerns provided that it relatively is actual... is it actual what they think of and say approximately you? regardless of if it relatively is no longer, than you need to permit their words pass you by skill of, like the river flows decrease than a bridge... it is not hassle-free before everything, in spite of the undeniable fact that it gets much less complicated in time... ocupy some time with stuff and persons you delight in. do effective issues. volunteer - helping somebody in % is a great convenience for you... sturdy success! you're able to do it! undergo in concepts consistently that: "regardless of your concepts can conceive, you could gain", and "regardless of in case you think of you're able to do it, or you think of you could no longer, the two way you're good"
2016-11-26 22:15:36 · answer #9 · answered by jarvie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will recover....the relationship most likely won't.
2006-11-01 07:00:13 · answer #10 · answered by heaven o 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋