My sister in law thinks she is better?

Question

She thinks she has a better relationship with our mother in law, and talks to her like they are the best of friends. My mother in law told me she can't stand her. I can tell my sister in law in trying to get underneath my skin. She even asked me what do I do at home, since I stay at home. I have two children and she said that sarcastically. I went over her house for the first time and she said her bed was bigger than mines...What I said and in my head I was thinking do I really care? My bed is the biggest one out there, and she is telling me about my bed...OKAY....She said her house was dirty, when it was clean as a whip. She stays at my inlaws big house when they go out of town and she takes care of the dog. They drove my inlaws nice cars around and make themselves feel at home, and invitied us to come over like it was their house. I love my house, I wouldn't want to stay at someone else's house. They have a nice apartment also. How to I respond to her negative ways?

who fights over a freaking bed?

I have a nice home and a nice car, I'm not jealous

I have a great life, but when I see my brother and sister in law they act like they are better than everyone

Answer 1

I know that she annoys you but its best just to ignore her. If she thinks shes better whats the harm in letting her continue to think it? After all, her own mother in law cant stand her why should you?
Just ignore nod your head and smile when she talks, let her live in her own world and you stay in yours :)

Answer 2

Feel sorry for her. She has this tremendous need to be better than anyone else. If you are secure, why not let her "win" the argument? If she says she's got a bigger bed, you can say that's nice and ask her if she ever has problems finding sheets.

Try and find some common ground somewhere -- things you can talk about without getting on each others' nerves. And if she says something hurtful, you might try confronting her gently: Why would you say something like that? And listen.

It's really hard when someone is trying so hard to be impressive. I hope you find a way to relate with her that doesn't drive you crazy. At least you don't have to live with her, like your brother does.

Answer 3

99% of the time when it sounds like people are tying to prove they are better then you, they are actually trying to prove to them selves they are better. Every family has some one like that. You need to just learn to ignore it. If you say something, you will only do damage to your relationship with your brother. Rise above her rudeness, she's only doing it to make herself feel better.
P.S. We ALL do the "Sorry my house is such a mess" thing, even though we secretly cleaned it for over an hour! And don't let any one make you feel bad for staying home and not working, maybe she is just making these comments to make herself feel better because she HAS to work, and she is jealous you don't.

Answer 4

So, don't deal with her unless you have to - like at major family events (weddings, funerals). There's no rule that says you have to be friends with her. Now, maybe you had hoped that you would have one nice big 'everybody gets along' families - but that didn't work out. My brother-in-law and his wife live about an hour from us - they got married about 1 and 1/2 years ago. My husband and I have been married 10 years. I had always hoped that when my BIL got married that we could develop a closer relationship (he was always partying with his single friends before) - but that hasn't worked out. I like my SIL - and thank goodness she's not treating me the way yours is treating you - but I had to let go of the idea that we would be close friends. We're friendly and here for each other in a crisis, but there are no family vacations in our future.

Try not to take her bait and eventually (maybe) she'll quit tossing it out. Best of luck!

Answer 5

just ignore her. that's the best way. just think about your life and your problems, not at what she's doing or what she's telling. people like her have nothing better to do than to look at what others are doing. but you must be happy with what you have (family, home...).
even the fact that you mother in law told you she can't stand her should make you feel better...

Answer 6

Maybe she's just trying to hard to be liked? And perhaps has a bit of a problem in communication skills!
Just try to overlook any and all that she says, let it go in one ear and out the other.
Some people tend to say stupid things when they get nervous, trying to fit in! I know this from experience, cause I've been the one to say something really stupid when I've been nervous around someone and really don't know what else to say.
Am I making any sense?

Answer 7

seems such as you teach satisfaction interior the reality she would have the ability to be overwhelmed. She is your sister - in regulation needless to say you tell her. you are able to desire to have walked up and slapped the guy. distinctive strokes for various persons, yet a loving sister is a treasure you the two look to no longer rejoice with. i wish you 2 can advance up adequate to help her by way of this. She needs you notwithstanding if she thinks she is a extra helpful spouse, and by capacity of ways SHE could be. It should not remember that YOUR HUSBAND is a extra helpful HUSBAND than hers. you are the fortunate one. quit attempting to out do one yet another and in basic terms be the terrific sister - in regulation you are able to. existence is so short.

Answer 8

IGNORE HER!!! I've got 4 of them (sisters-in-law). Don't play the game or you'll be playing it forever. Just be happy with you've got (sounds like you already are). Be grateful for a good husband, place to live, your kids, etc....

People who behave that way want and are in desperate need for attention. I know it's difficult, let it go.

Answer 9

Ignore them. If that is all they want to talk about, change the subject or just flat out tell them, who cares who's bed is bigger, as long as it makes us happy!?

Answer 10

I think you should ask yourself why you care. Do you really want to instigate an argument between you mother in law and her? If not, why are you talking about their relationship? I know you are not going to like my response, but I think you should consider it.