I asked a question the other day b/c I found out my b/f was lying to me. He went to a funeral, his best friends mom died. I verified the funeral was real & it was. He told me his friend was going to go with him & when I ask if he wanted me to go he said he didn't think it would be a good idea to go b/c his friends wife was not going to go. So I found out his friend didn't go with him. It was like 2 or 3 hundred miles away & I talked to him most of the time & he was constantly telling me he loved me & couldn't wait to get back to see me. So I pretty much knew he didn't take another women wth him but I couldn't understand why he lied to me & didn't want me to go. I thought perhaps he was going to meet someone there or something like that. So I confronted him about it. I said who went with you to the funeral & be honest? He said nobody, I am sorry I lied to you but I didn't know who to tell you the truth. I wasn't sure how his family would accept our interracial relationship.
2006-11-01 00:27:54 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am white, he is black. I told him if he can be with me here, he should be able to be with me anywhere and if that was the real reason, all he had to do was tell me the truth. My question is, do you guys buy this or you think he is still lying and why would he care what other people thought? We have been together 7 months and we live together. Thanks.
2006-11-01 00:29:16 · update #1
Oh and he called me when he first got there & throughout the time he was there. The funeral was at 2 p.m. He called me at 3:30 saying he was on his way back & I talked to him most of the way back...if this helps your opinion.
2006-11-01 00:31:35 · update #2
I got some answers, Thanks!! But I need to clarify some things. We go out in public together all the time and I have also met his daughter.
2006-11-01 02:18:06 · update #3
Whether he's lying or not, y'all need to settle this issue now or throw in the towel...being of different races isn't something either of you can change (like an annoying habit) so let him know that you feel y'all either are a couple (in every way and every place) or perhaps you had better part ways so he's not ashamed or embarassed that you aren't the same color he is...
2006-11-01 00:31:54 · answer #1 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I can imagine that if this is an old family friend that there were lots of people there. It is unfortunate that some people are still racist and are against interracial dating.
You have not been together that long, and that was probably not the best venue to introduce a new GF.
I would just chalk it up as him being stupid and let it go. Next time he might think about it and tell you the truth.
2006-11-01 09:11:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There may have been a young lady that he has had dealings with before that he knew would be there and didn't want any controversy but I do believe more so the interracial excuse he gave you. That excuse is not uncommon for a black male to use, since he feels its alright to sleep with a woman of another race on what I like to call the "down low" and then when it is time for family gatherings and such, you are suddenly not good enough to be around his strong minded and opinionated black family who may not understand. It is a lot of grief that he cowardly doesn't want to handle. I agree with you, if you are appetizing and good enough under the sheets then he should be able to take you out in the daytime and around family.
2006-11-01 09:09:10 · answer #3 · answered by Charisma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Marybeth
I as going to say that he probably is telling you the truth. Family's that are black and also white hate the thought of there sons or daughter going out with the opposite colour. It sound to me since in the end he told you the truth that it makes seance and his family will not accept you. To me he was saving you some embarrassment and now you know the truth you both can work this out with his family. Good luck
2006-11-01 08:36:37 · answer #4 · answered by chass_lee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've entered the twilight zone...the man you're dating isn't the man you thought you met! Try matching the puzzle pieces a little more carefully, I think you'll find you've made several misjudgements as far as this guy is concerned and the only way to rectify them is to watch him, not ask him. He's going to give you excuses as to why he does this and that, because he wants you to stick around(for whatever reason!). How many of his friends and your friends(previous to the dating) do you hang around? Do they all seem to fall under the same heading and what do they all act like around the two of you? You have some work toy do that should have been done long before you started calling him your "boyfriend"...
2006-11-01 08:35:21 · answer #5 · answered by wetdreamdiver 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Believe it or not some people still live in the past. They actually think there is a difference between people of different colors. I would believe him, but tell him that you can't have a good relationship with him if he isn't honest with you.
2006-11-01 08:32:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well it was wrong for him to lie, but with it being a funeral no one needed anymore to deal with. I myself do not judge by the color of skin. If you love someone you love them and that is it. Keep in mind that not everyone is open minded about life. If it really bothers you then talk to him about it.
Best of Luck!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-11-01 08:32:23 · answer #7 · answered by hummingbird 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
he should see if they would be fine with you but if they're not then that's between ya'll.
2006-11-01 08:38:52 · answer #8 · answered by Babez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yucky!
2006-11-01 08:29:29 · answer #9 · answered by Cherry 2000 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋