What is the difference?Girls advise please....?

Question

What's the difference between dating a girl and just going out as friends?

I keep going out with my close female friend, we go to dinner, lunch together and for drinks in the evening. We also take roadtrips together to the coast and to the country for walks, usually followed by dinner and its just the 2 of us.This happens at least every 2 weeks, if not on a weekly basis. While we're out we flirt, tell each other everything, feel very comfortable with each other, sort of act as a couple....

I've noticed that she does not like it when I mention other girls that have caught my eye, she changes the subject ASAP. When I mention if she's interested in anyone, the answer is always no,she hasn't pulled anyone when out,etc...we kissed once after 1 night out(a few months bck) but nothing since,just keep meeting up,in constant touch etc

Would this be dating? What does my friend see this as? Is this a relationship,what type?

If this is a platonic bond, why can't I mention other girls?

Recently she thought that I started dating a girl and she practicaly ignored me for a week--was this jealousy or just a coincidence? My behaviour did not change towards her and I'm not actually dating anyone.

Also when I mention the topic of commitment and feelings she changes the topic and won't speak about it, even though I'm not referring to 'us'.Why? Also when I joked she had a new boyfriend she shouted down the phone "what f**king boyfriend!there's no one, I wish I had one,f**king hell". Why'd she get so angry?

We're meeting this wkn, should I say something, as I don't think this 'relationship' is normal or is it?

Advice appreciated

p.s after the kiss she said we should stay as we are, but I think the way we're carrying on is not good for us both-when I do try to mention about it going further possibly she refuses to speak about it.How can I mention it?

How can I say to her that we should go on a date, if we're always going out?

Answer 1

You two go out alot, it doezn't mean ur dating, but u kissed her awhile back & she kissed u back, why iz that ? why did u kiss her?? ask urself this question, also, when a gurl hatez it when a guy talkz about gurlz, it meanz she'z jelouse, n'friendz don't do that ... She doezn't think u two are "dating", if that'z what ur asking, but she'z tryin' to grab ur eye somehow by spending alot of time with u, maybe u'll like her more than a friend & ask her out on a real date,, this gurl wantz 2get 2know u better & she also wantz u 2want her back.. she knowz u two arn't a couple,, but from what u said, it seemz that she likez u more than a friend.
The relationship between u 2 iz only friendship, but itz obviouse she wantz something more. So, If u don't feel the same for her, try not to spend soo much time with her, coz that'll hurt her even more. there'z no use in a "friendship" when one side wantz more. therefore, she doezn't want u az a friend, but a boyfriend..
& No, itz not dating, if she keepz changing the subj & when u ask her if she likez anyone she tellz u no, that meanz itz definitly not dating. n'this gurl seez this "quality time" az tryin' to get to know each other, she wantz u2 know her well & really like her az a person, rather than just ask u out. & the relationship between u2 iz friendship, with one part "interested"!! & the reazon why u can't mention other gurlz iz becoz she wantz u 2focus on HER while ur spending time with her. that'z why she getz bothered & changez the subj, coz that makez her feel like she doezn't exist in ur "like" list .

All the best to the both of u..

Hey, I just read the other stuff u just submitted, About mentioning it 2her, well, if u LIKE her, just tell her how u feel, tell her u feel u2 understand each other very well & u think it would be nice to take this friendship to a new level... If not, don't say anything., u'll hurt her that way, coz she obviously likez u, when she yellz on the phone the fact that she doeznt have a bf, it meanz she'z "AVAILABLE " if ur interested. so, if u don't feel the same, just hook up with someone else & try not to spend alota' ur time with her.

Answer 2

First, do you like her? I'm sure you do so why not ask her out because its obvious that she's really down with you and waiting for you to pop the question and not have to talk about other girls when she's right in your face.

However, if you want her as only a friend, nothing more, then you have to reduce the time you spend with her. Call her once in a week, then once in two weeks, don't take roadtrips and the rest except once in a blue moon and cut close contacts so she would get the message. It sounds harsh but that's the way you would be able to put her in her place as a friend, that is, if you only want to be just friends.

Answer 3

Erm, sounds like you are dating to me. Maybe you should ask this girl where she sees the two of you going.

No one but the two of you know what you are doing, so asking us lot in here is not gonna really be much help.

From an outsiders point of view with only your side to go on though, it does sound like a bit more than friendship. Although I have many friends that are male and some of whom I am very close to, we can do all sorts of stuff together but there is no crossing of friendship lines and we both know where we stand. Because there was kissing involved in one of your evenings, I would say she would like something to happen between you!

Think on your next, erm date/meeting (whatever it is you are doing) you bring up the subject and watch her reaction. If she looks appalled by your comments, then I don't think she wants anything more. If she gets a lil' old twinkle in her eye, you know its on!!!

Answer 4

Um dude are you listening to yourself??? You're definately not dating but if things are as you say they are she definately wants you! Don't expect her to come clean with her feelings first - if she's anything like me she likes the guy to take charge. Be a man, let her know how you feel about her - if you have feelings for her that is? Show you're attracted to her. You've been friends for a while, being too comfortable with each other can make you forget that you still do need to impress her and sweep her off her feet. Make her feel wanted and use your closeness to discuss where you want your relationship to go from here. It's scary to change friendship into a relationship because if it doesn't work, chances are it will never be the same again. Now's where you ask yourself, 'Is she worth the risk?'.
Good luck.....xxx

Answer 5

Okay, this girl obviously likes you and feels comfortable with you but does not have a need to pursue it further.

It seems to me that she wants you to herself and would be upset if you did find another girl whom you formed a relationship with.

However, there is no progress between the two of you. Perhaps it is because you fulfill all her needs, like companionship, confidante, and so on, but there is not enough spark for her to move into something more serious with you at this time.

Of course, she will behave 'jealously' if you mention other girls because she knows that your attention will move elsewhere and you will not have as much time for her if you do have a girlfriend.

You can always ask her out properly, then you will get a definitive answer.

Answer 6

Ah, I know what you mean. Lately I've been struggling with keeping on my own "mask", so to speak. Yes, I do know that fear of losing control. Do you spend a lot of time alone? Because it's an important factor to consider. I always feel more unstable after prolonged periods of social isolation. Being alone with my own dark thoughts makes the matter worse, to the point where I can no longer tell what is normal or acceptable and what is not. Maybe get yourself some friends that don't really grate on your nerves too much and hang out with them whenever you feel you need a reality check. Also, it's very important that you keep your violent impulses under control. You said it yourself, you're not a violent guy under regular circumstances, so don't let one slip ruin it all for you. Prison is a nasty place, and people often come out of it worse than they were before. Don't kill unless in self defense, if the laws of your country/state allow for it. Ordinary morons? Gotta deal with them. Perhaps a bit of escapism would help with this; try to move/keep your violent impulses in the realm of fantasy. You know, violent games, action movies or horror literature... they're perfectly legal outlets for bloodlust.

Answer 7

It may seem like just a friendship to you, but i have the feeling your friend sees it as something more. As hard as it may seem, you will need to talk to her about it or she is going to become more attached. If you don't want to be in a relationship with her let her know that you appreciate her friendship but don't want anything more. Perhaps mention to her that it would be great for you to stay such good friends even when you've met someone. This might ease the blow a bit.

Answer 8

speaking from the female point of view of course,
i was in a simaliar situation when i was in my late teens, we came from the country and climed loads hills/fields .always met up in the evening (just like yourself).
For a few months i was uneasy, as i didnt know what all this meant, i tought if i say someyhing to try and bring us closer i might ruin what good friendship we had.
at the same time i didnt want to see anyone else just in case he really did like me.
Finally we spoke about it and decided to remain goods friends, we carried on with our walks and everything else.
i am married now ,but my friend is always there for me and we never allowed it to turn into anything more.

Answer 9

I think she may like you, it explains the fact that she's not interested in other guys and does not like your talking about other girls. Maybe she's just waiting for you to make a move!?!

There's no actual difference between dating and going out as friends. I guess it's just the fact of knowing what you mean/are to each other!

Answer 10

she like you a lot. the difference between dating and going out as Friends is that you do not sleep together. i think she wants to be more than friends. why not ask her how she feels about you. i think you give it a go friends make the best boy friends and girl friends because you know each other already