one guy just told me that i am the one he is looking for and i love him sooo much but for the three months we were broken up i found another guy who completely loves me and he tells me that if it weren't for the other guy i would be the love of his life. i feel like i love them both equally but in different ways. how can i decide?
2006-10-31 19:25:23 · 15 answers · asked by anonymous 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
very complicated.. but i'll try my level best.
take some time, before you take any decsion. Stay in touch with both of them, but don't hang out. Tel them, you need some time to think, so that they will understand why you are not coming out with them.
Time is good medicine for your case. Some one might turn colour, or you might get more interest with some one.
Worst case is , you might get interested with the guy who turned color..
god saves you.
2006-10-31 19:36:04 · answer #1 · answered by Ramses-the son of light 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The human heart has an infinite capacity for love. Affection can manifest itself in many different ways. Unfortunately logistically having more than one person in your life in that sort of romantic capacity can be very confusing for all parties. Even if you were to become comfortable with the idea that you can love more than one person in a romantic sense (Polyamory) it certainly sounds like the men in your life would not. If you are with a person dating more than one person it can be hard for you to believe that their adoration of another doesn't take away from their feelings for you. Calmly explain to both men that you need to take some time to sort your feelings out. Explain that you care deeply for both of them and equally and if they cannot accept that they will need to be patient in letting you choose. Then sit yourself down and take some time to think about each man and the sort of relationship you want. If you have to choose it will end up being for practical reasons. Which man can give you the things you need? Which shares more of your core beliefs about what a relationship should be. One of the biggest mistakes people make is assuming that relationships should be based on mutual values about life. Disagreeing beliefs about life, religion, politics and the world can be worked through, it's much more important that you share beliefs on what a relationship should be. Make sure that whoever you choose is willing to work at the relationship and understands that just because you made the sacrifice and decision to be with him doesn't mean your feelings for the other man magically disappear. Also if you want to keep the other man in your life make sure they both understand in what capacity he will be with you. There are so many wonderful people in the world it would be difficult to love just one, yes it's rare to find someone who you're compatible with on that many levels. Feel truly blessed you've found two such people. Good Luck.
2006-10-31 20:39:31 · answer #2 · answered by ConstantCupcake 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, congratulations. It's not everyday you find the one you love. That said, the key is the one YOU love. It is nice to be loved, and even obsessed over, by a really good man, let's be brutally honest here, but which of these guys makes your heart beat faster? Which one makes your blood tingle and which one do you want to talk to AS SOON as something new happens? Regardless of how they feel, which one is the love of YOUR life?
Infatuation can disguise itself as many things, but love stands true through thick and thin, is patient, is kind, is passionate, is tolerant, is helful and so much more. So, like a fortunate visitor to a very good wine cellar, you must now pick the bouquet of YOUR choice. Good Luck
2006-10-31 21:26:18 · answer #3 · answered by Sugar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Basically, yes.
You can find more than two. I don't think it's a good idea, but it is possible. They would be different, but you can love each of them.
My first wife had several loves of her life. I was only one of them and I divorced her because you can't have a marriage that operates like that.
My advice to you would be to stop dating both of them for a while.
Love is very complicated. I think you may be confusing attraction with love. I am very attracted to a lot of women, but I don't do much about that because my wife won't let me. And I think it would be a bad idea anyway.
Love involves commitment. What would these guys be willing to give up to have you spend the rest of your life with them? What would you be willing to give up to do the same? Would you sacrifice your life to save the man you love? Would you follow him to the North Pole if he wanted to go?
Love is a lot more than most of us think it is. You probably don't really understand as much about it as you think you do or as you should to commit to someone in this way. If you did you wouldn't have this issue.
That's not a scolding, sweetie. It is fatherly advice from someone who would very much like you to make the best choice to have a happy life.
God bless.
2006-10-31 19:40:48 · answer #4 · answered by Warren D 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I saw a "movie" like that once. It was sooo hot!
Errr sorry, I got distracted.
Seriously. Three months! You are not in love yet. You are only experiencing infatuation. Give it time. Love may come. If it does, it will not be to two guys at the same time.
2006-10-31 19:32:49 · answer #5 · answered by hersh006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love isn't all that simple. 40 years from now you might realize you didn't really know what love was.
If you can't decide then you need to pull away from both of them because you aren't being fair to either of them.
2006-10-31 19:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take your time way the pros and cons see where you would be with each later in life see who matches you discover why you broke up and see if having him back is worth not having the other guy and yes it is possible to love more than one person the same amount
2006-10-31 19:29:37 · answer #7 · answered by Juanita Tsangning 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See you said it right there at the end.... Seems you don't love either one not all the way.. where you love one of them.. you love the other in the other guys faults so as a whole person you don't love either one... thats my opinion though...
2006-10-31 19:31:57 · answer #8 · answered by sweetchic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to tell your doctor this so he can get you on hormone theropy when you had them tied you messed with mother nature, but allso is your husband still sexually attracked to you [basicaly is he still allways trying to make love to you] if not get him interested in you again you have to keep it spicey in todays socity life is in the fast lane an there is no time need to slow down an make time
2016-03-19 02:24:13 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
Guys are like stars - so many to pick from but only one can make all your dreams come true!
2006-10-31 19:29:05 · answer #10 · answered by CK 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋