really need help. i need to forget this person i love so much for 8 years. whenever i get to know someone new or try to go into the dating scene and try to move on. why i cant seem to do it?
instead i would be thinking about him all day/night cried myself to sleep. i can't let him go despite knowing he does not love me back. sometimes i feel like a walking emotional baggage..
somehow it has an effect on how i treat other potential suitors (either i totally ignore them or i will tend to compared the suitors to the guy i love)..despite trying to cut contacts with him .. i still end up trying to find him back .. what can i do ? i really need closure of him..
we talked before once and all i asked him to simply say it out right in my face that he doesnt love me at all so that i can move on . but he did not and cannot not say it . so i am pretty sure that he does not love me at all.. so everything is left out hanging unresolved...
2006-10-31 17:48:28 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Seek professional help . . . I did. It didn't help too much, but it might help you.
Good luck . . .
2006-10-31 17:51:44 · answer #1 · answered by Payne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are pathetic, then millions of people out there are too. Don't be silly. Buck-up! You did nothing wrong, and are going thru the normal "grieving" period after a breakup. Went thru the same thing. Hubby left for another woman, telling me he didn't love me anymore. Ouch! But ya know what, it does get easier. Go see a Therapist to help you thru this, as you don't seem able to do it on your own. I work for therapists, so I had constant support here. Stop looking for someone new, until you have sorted out your baggage. It's not fair on you, or a potential partner. Don't give him the satisfaction of letting this affect your whole life Sweetie. Get help, get over him (he doesn't appreciate you anyhow), and get on with a wonderful life!
2006-11-01 01:57:12 · answer #2 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
:( been there done that! it sucks. love sucks sometimes. true love sucks. this is definately true love for you. man i thought me waiting 3 yrs for someone was long, 8 that is awesome. OKay not for you but man if men only knew how much we really put into stuff.
this guy doesn't deserve the cries at night for him, nor the "awaits" for him. i needed also closure in a relationship and well every man that has ever hurt me never gave it to me. i know what it feels like and i would never want to go back to feel that way. you need to tell your self he is not worth waiting for, saving your self from getting intimate with another guy; nothing is gonna make him come back as much as it hurts. men suck! move on seriously. find that special someone else, it might take you a long time and change your thinking and perspectives in alot of things now but you need a life of your own. this guy doesnt know how pure you are.
its hard but time will heal if you let it
2006-11-01 03:00:44 · answer #3 · answered by j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand exactly how you feel. I once loved someone so much that I continued to think about him and miss him for at least 20 yrs (not something you wanted to hear is it?)
Then you know what happened? We met for dinner when he was in town & all I kept thinking was "I loved this man?" It seemed that I had grown up but he didn't. It didn't help that we had the greatest sex I've ever had in my whole life. Plus he was gorgeous and had money. But he was a womanizer & I finally, after 4 years, I wised up and left him. Even though I missed him for such a long time, I always knew that I was better off without him.
I met a guy shortly after our break-up who I believe would have made a good husband but I compared him (and all men) to my former lover & they always seemed to come up short. I never became involved with a womanizer again. Eventually you will come to accept each man you meet as being unique in his own way.
So try to move on. I know it's a hard thing to do but have yourself a good time, meet lots of friends, date & even tho you may long for him, you'll find that as time goes by, you won't think of him often.
2006-11-01 02:03:59 · answer #4 · answered by Judith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
poor baby, i know what you mean. Love sucks doesnt it, you dont have to answer it i know it does. Man if you love someone you love someone its nothing you can do youll always love him as i will always love my ex i want to tell her this but i know she wont understand how exactly i feel she would like hear it i know, but some people dont understand the efect love has on some people so maybe you can try talking to him again and see what happens and remember as long as he doesnt have anyone new there is a reason for that, if you want to talk feel free to take my IM. BYE,
2006-11-01 01:56:28 · answer #5 · answered by Adrian N. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl, ur in desperate need of a break fr all these emotional torture ur doin 2 urself..
u need 2 accept d sad truth that its over b/w u & him & that u need 2 move on.
whenever u miss him, look in d mirror & tell urself "wake up girl! there r so many fishes in d sea.. if u continue this, u'd end up losing Mr. Right who might just be right around d corner"..
in tym u'l heal.. hope it happens soon..
go out w/frends & family.. enjoy life. losing him doesnt mean its d end of d world.
life is 2 short so look @ all d gud things in ur life & throw away d bad hurtful memories
2006-11-01 02:17:40 · answer #6 · answered by 2D1iLuV 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its hard to say im sorry i cant offer ant help other than to say to you every person is different and therefor needs to handle these things in there own way i really hope you are able to get past this pain ya feeling and move on with youre life
2006-11-01 01:51:38 · answer #7 · answered by mustang_rws 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough it out soilder. When you lose your love its like a storm of emotions. Weather it out and let time help you forget. Focus on something else. Excercise or something if your tired you won't think about him.
2006-11-01 01:52:12 · answer #8 · answered by KSJTam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not pathetic. It's just very sad.
I would talk to a therapist before this controls your whole life.
God bless.
2006-11-01 01:53:20 · answer #9 · answered by Jenna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is pathetic and get over it.
2006-11-01 01:52:21 · answer #10 · answered by ??? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋