did he ever love me??

Question

I was with me ex boyfriend for a year and half...it was a mutual break up although i think i found it alot harder, (not over him totally yet) straight afer we broke up i asked if he wanted to try again and we both knew that it just wasnt going to work, so i left it as that. i found out shortly after that he went out with a girl who i hate 2 weeks afterwards and kissed her i confronted him and told him i knew, he said he felt guilty so i told him not to because we wasnt together anymore but i was hurt and he knew it, now they are together but he doesnt know i know it has only been 4-5 months since we broke up and i know they have been together for a month.....did he really love me or was it just anything to him?? dont know why i want to know, but i thought he did and this has just made me wonder about things although i know i shouldnt. answers appreciated thanks x

Answer 1

no

Answer 2

If he was abusive, then this answer will not apply, because the dynamics totally change, but it doesn't sound like he was.

Here's the simple fact of males. They have no clue about the healing process. They often do some very stupid things to go about trying to feel better (not that women are ever guilty of this either *s*).

I have trouble believing that he would have stayed with you for over a year and a half without having some kind of strong feelings for you. I do not know him, and so I can't definitively say that he loved you (that he's capable of love), or that he is not or did not.

Men are famous for that whole "transition" woman thing. That is where they date someone immediately after a breakup to soothe themselves. These relationships rarely last.

Now, something inside of you needs to wake up and realize that you are PERFECTLY OKAY without him. You are a strong individual that can stand to be alone. You are not needy. You are not dependent. You may still hurt and that's fine. You may still grieve and thats fine. But you need to know for a solid FACT, that this breakup does not mean that you are somehow wrong or incomplete.

As you heal, you will begin to realize that you have new inner-strength from this breakup. You have proven that you can not only survive, but thrive without a man. And that knowledge allows you to enter into new relationships with a much healthier outlook, and most likely those relationships will prove more satisfying.

Answer 3

Did you feel at some point in the relationship that he did love you??
He probably did. But he has moved on now, and unfortunately you've had a much harder run trying to move past these feelings.
I want to encourage you not to compare yourself to this girl. It did not work between you and your ex probably for good reason. I believe that you can truly measure your love for someone by being able to determine if you feel happy that they have moved on and are happy. My ex is going out with one of my friends and couldn't be happier. I know i loved her a great deal and somehow i feel content that at last she is happy, something that i did not give her very well. It does not bother me in the slightest that they are together. Maybe the situation is a little different but I think the same attutude could apply and we could all move on in this situation better if we tried to realise that this person is so much happier being with some one else.
Don't try and question your relationship (even though its quite normal) what happened has happened and analysing the past in this case may just make you miss the good times. Perhaps your suspicions are correct and he fell for this girl while he was with you, but i doubt that will change anything knowing this. If this is true and you are right he will still be with this girl and you will be sad that the relationship has ended.
He may have loved you but its possible he loves her more. this doesnt make you less worthy of love, but perhaps you should be less concerned with his love and begin to look forward to the next love of your life! Best wishes :)

Answer 4

There are so many reasons why he could be with another person so soon after and not all of them mean he didn't ever love or care for you.

He might have kissed this girl on the rebound but then later things developed between the two of them. You don't know how he came to the decision to get into another relationship, maybe he agonised over it for ages, maybe he didn't- so many possible explanations.

Things obviously weren't going great at the time the two of you decided to split ,his feelings may have simply died over time. Appreciate what you had when things were going good and leave it at that.

Hope that makes you feel a bit better x

Answer 5

Its hard to say if he ever loved you based upon the information given but his actions after the fact probably confirms that he is moving on with his life and letting go. Love can be confused with many things and probably what he felt for you wasnt it - who knows? What you should know is that you need to let go - doesnt mean you have to hate the man - but remain amicable friends if you can - who knows what may bring you both back together down the road if the feelings are still there.

Answer 6

He probably did love you, you were together a year and a half, males are fickle, they seem to get over things more easily than women, or he may be with that girl you hate, just to make you jealous, playing some sort of silly game, as men do. hey sweetie try to move on, get out there enjoy yourself and meet new people , you don't have to get into a relationship straight away, have some fun, sounds like you deserve it, life is for living and you sound really young, life's to short to waste, travel, if you can, have a ball...........go girl. good luck and god bless.

Answer 7

Yes , he loved you....i went out with a guy , broke up , and 4 months later went out with someone else , but realised i still hadn't got over the first guy....its probably just a rebound thing , now i'm not going out with either of them (my decision both times) but out of the two i'm finding it MUCH harder to get over the first guy...longer relationship , deeper feelings , etc.
So don't worry about it - just know that he loved you , even though you can't be together , and stay special ;-)

Answer 8

Hunny, you know as well as I know that the guy took you for a ride. He got what he wanted and now he heas gone, and is doing it to some other girl. That is life, it just isn't fair.

You know what you need to do? Move on. He wasn't good for you, why would you want to get back with such a bum who uses you and before it's over he ios ona other? is that love? Baby that guy is diven by lust...you can't have him, he was never yours.

I'm Sorry.

Answer 9

It doesn't sound like love to me although only he can answer a question like that. Love is hard to let go. You'll know when its love when he hangs up and calls right back or buys you flowers just because or something along that line.

Answer 10

i definitely would say he didn't love you and he doesn't love you now. i think you need to go out with an awesome, nicer, hotter looking guy and have a great time so you can forget about this and move on, which is best for you. : )
don't appreciate him for being polite, nice or still talking to you now, he is with some one else, he doesn't love you, you don't need his pity, maybe he sees you as vulnerable or a booty call. take your time but take care of yourself. you deserve much better with someone else and can do much better!! : )

Answer 11

Well you never told us how he treated you, so I don't know if he loved you, but I think he does because then he wouldn't be feeling bad about you seeing him kiss the girl. Sometimes love has to end, I bet there is someone better there waiting for you. trust me I know for experience.