I hear of brides moaning about what they have to do for other people on their wedding day. Why bother? A marriage is essentially a ceremony that tells other people in your community that you intend to live together as man and wife from now on. A simple service with anyone who wants to attend will be sufficient to get your wedded life off to a good start. Why all the other palaver?
2006-10-31 09:04:47 · 15 answers · asked by Delora Gloria 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
That's a common misconception, that as the bride it's "Your Day". That's not accurate, weddings are about bringing two families together to celebrate the marriage of two individuals. There is a difference between a wedding and a marriage and most people don't remember that. The bride and groom should make most of the decisions but there are other people involved especially if the bride and groom are spending someone else's money.
2006-10-31 10:21:01 · answer #1 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think, different people do it for different reasons. In some families, it would be unthinkable for the daughter to not have a big wedding with all the relatives in attendance. Others simply like to follow traditions, and like the traditional ceremony and everything that goes with it (guests, bridesmaids, nice dress, etc). From the practical standpoint, you really don't need much of anything beyond showing up in front of the justice of peace with two witnesses, and signing the papers. The extent to which people are prepared to go to celebrate depends on their mindset and on what they consider important.
I had a small informal wedding, and I was stressed out because my MIL disapproved at first, wanting us to have a more traditional set-up. But we stuck with our plans, and everyone ended up having fun. I think, there's a certain amount of pressure on the bride and groom to have a "real" wedding - it's like a small wedding is not "special" enough; we had even been told we would "regret" not having a big one. But c'mon; we're both in our 30s, we kinda knew what we wanted; the big fancy wedding wasn't it. However, I can see how some folks simply go with the majority opinion, not wanting to "rock the boat".
2006-10-31 18:54:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why indeed, like many other special occasions wedding days seem to have been turned into a race to see how much money you can spend, how much food you can eat, how many bottles of champagne can be drunk not to mention the fancy cars, elaborate flowers videos etc, the list could go on and on and don't forget the hen/stag night which used to be a last night out with friends before settling down and can now stretch to a week in Ibiza! When people had the simpler ceremony and reception didn't they stay together longer?
2006-10-31 17:14:04 · answer #3 · answered by Rahab 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Brides get caught up in the fantasy and forget that the important part is the marriage, not the ceremony. Plus there may be a lot of pressure for the couple to do what the family wants or expects of them.
2006-10-31 17:06:43 · answer #4 · answered by Brainiac 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A wedding isn't just "your day". I think one should do want they want but respect other people's wishes if possible. For example, I wanted a simple, small, casual ceremony in front of the "justice of the peace". I am my parents' only daughter and my mother wanted me to have a "proper" wedding. So we had a small, 60 people wedding in a small chapel, I wore a dress, not a gown, and we had a catered dinner in a small room in a small hall. The whole thing was done in 5 hours and it was simple, relaxed, casual and beautiful. I had the best time and people said it was the best wedding they'd been to.
2006-10-31 17:19:02 · answer #5 · answered by Nicole 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think a wedding day should be arranged to the taste of the couple getting married. It is their day - not their day only, but i do think everything that they like only should be arranged and not things specially arranged for others. Exceptions being to include a bit of music to keep the older ones happy, so they can enjoy it too. Essentially though it should be about what the couple want.
2006-10-31 18:43:08 · answer #6 · answered by cherub 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't whine at all about what I had to do for the wedding, though I did freak the night before and told my fiance to come home asap because I wasn't going to be able to sleep without him. But I thought of my wedding day as the day my love and I told each other in front of our world that we plan on spending the rest of our lives together in love. I thought of the decorations as a way to represent myself, not as a way to impress guests that won't remember past 10 after they left.
2006-10-31 18:08:47 · answer #7 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's mainly the couples day - but also a family day too.
It's a great way of getting family and friends together to celebrate.
There is some pressure to have a big do. I was tempted to go off to a remote island with husband man - but so many people protested that I thought I'd better not!
2006-10-31 17:40:47 · answer #8 · answered by Nicola L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree absolutely. I got married this year in May. We kept it small, in fact less than 20 people and we thought that was too much! The special days are the ones ahead too! Save a lot of money too... keeps the pressure down. The most important thing is doing something special between two people... commitment and loving one another. I think people are crazy to spend thousands!
2006-10-31 19:25:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because it is not just "your day." The day belongs to everyone who cares about you as well. Besides a wedding ceremony takes 1 hour, if you are inviting people to come to a ceremony, --you must feed them. With food comes drinks. You must entertain them, that means dinner & dancing & favors.
Of course this is an important day in you life--so you need photogs.
2006-10-31 17:54:16 · answer #10 · answered by ee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋