What do you do when your toddler throws a temper tantrum in public?

Answer 1

Walk away...not far enough to lose sight of him/her...but just enough to make them think.

Answer 2

Well first and foremost try to keep your cool. I know this is tough, especially in public when there is on lookers. We tend to feel as though everyone is judging you. There are some (usually people with no children) who will judge you, but who cares about them! I am not saying to be rude or have no regard for others, but there are some things you just can't help. Your child and the interaction between the two of you is more important. I think you will find that most can sympathize, and have been in the same situation. If it makes you feel better, isolate your self, leave the public situation (car, bathroom, Fitting room, parking area, etc.) Take a deep breath and stay calm. Remember that each time you handle a tantrum, you are reinforcing the way you will react to the next tantrum (through your feedback or the lack of feedback). I am the mother of two and one of my children is a toddler. I find that if she doesn't get the rise out of me that she is after, her tantrum quickly subsides. I very calmly tell her in terms that she understands, "I will talk to you when you are nice", or "you can have that When...you ask nicely, or when we get home, or after dinner etc." Then I leave her alone. I think generally a toddlers tantrum is because they are frustrated, tired, or have a need they can't express with their limited verbal skills. Try to avoid these situations, always carry snacks, special travel toys, stickers., etc. Forego outings until after naps. When all else fails stop, count to ten, and maintain your composure, and remember this too shall pass. Good Luck to you.

Answer 3

Our first born's way of tantruming was to throw himself on the ground in silence. This was pretty easy to ignore, while at the same time not bothering anyone else! One time in a restuarant, tho, when he threw himself in silence on the floor under our table, this other customer kept giving us dirty looks. I really couldn't understand that, but now I think maybe she thought it was dirty and gross....ugh....

Our second born was more vocal. I wanted to ignore tantrums as a general principle that punishment is attention which can produce more of something one wants to make go away. However, when he would scream in public, I felt it was wrong to disrupt other people.

Therefore, I would pick him up and remove him from the store. This probably worked because the tantrums probably happened when he was at the end of his rope for coping with stimulation or frustration. There are also often issues of a child being hungry, tired, or thirsty and still having to go go go. A tantrum might be a signal that a child has to be tended to for some basic physical needs - or it might be an inappropriate attempt to deal with frustration or to manipulate.

So, when I would pick him up to remove him from a public place, I would say, "We have to go outside because people are trying to think in here, you can't be disturbing people like that." And we'd go outside, walk around a little bit, and sometimes even went home.

We really had few issues with this. Because we ignored tantrums when it was safe, because we encouraged them to 'use their words' to talk about frustration, because we talked with them about our expectations for public behavior before we entered a public place, there were few tantrums overall.

Answer 4

LOL I am there with you!!

Toddler are tantrum throwers--that is what they do! Don't think it is b/c anything you are or aren't doing. He/she is just tryign to learn the boundaries.

When they throw a fit, set the boundaries. You have to find your own way to do that but here is what I do....

I pick them up, squat down at their level, get them to look at me, and tell them NO. This is not okay. Stop it Now. If they don't stop you take them in the bathroom or to the car and sit them down in a time out. After 2-3 minutes, ask them if they are ready to go back in the store and act nice. If they do act nice the rest of the time I reward them with postive attention and occasionally a treat from the store.

It is an absolute pain in the rear to stop my day and do this but it works and let them know where the boundaries are.

Good Luck!!

Answer 5

Hi , well at that age its difficult for them to understand talking to them ,,,that when they don't get there way cant have a temper tantrum , and at times when you are trying to make them stop , it gets worse , so ,,, you need to start working with that at home,,, well when they don't get there way and they start having one of there tantrum well then you need to let them know that it is not OK,, for that kind behavior and start by taking away something that they really like ,, make a space in your house that you would make that the timeout place,,and little by little they will know that if they have a tantrum that it wouldn't be nice for them, at the same time talk to them and let know ,,
good luck
Leena

Answer 6

My toddler is 32 yrs old but when I was raising him (he was pretty good) but any fit in public was an immediate trip to the car and taken home, got a babysitter and went back to the store without him. He was told that I would not accept his behavior and he was not going to be allowed to come along as long as he was acting like that. Even a 2 year old can understand that Mommies is going to the store and I am not going too. It took a few times but if he even started to be in the mood for a fit I would just lean down and say "would you like to go home to the sitter and Mommie will come back without you?" and he would just shake his little pointed head no.
You have to be the boss from the start.
Good luck I hope this helps. He is a good man today.

Answer 7

First things you need to do is:
1. Know your child. You know your child's temperment and if you know they can't handle themselves in a certain place then you need to PREPLAN the event (so it goes smoothly and you don't go insane!). That may mean, bringing certain snacks, that may mean giving the child to a family member to babysit while you go alone, that may mean going to a grocery store that has a "sitter service" while you shop. It could mean telling yourself that you know he/she gets fussy after 20 minutes and give yourself a time limit. (Also, did your child get a nap in? Are you expecting unrealistic expectations on a young child who's overtired, etc.?).
2. If your child is old enough to understand, talk to them beforehand. If you do not cry or ask me for things the whole time, and I will try to make it short....then I will take you to the park later on tonight (or I will read a story to you when we get home that you pick out, etc.)
3. While it's happening, I suggest to one: ignore it, get out to the car or out of the situation as soon as you can, then when you get to the car FIRMLY (but not yelling) tell your child THAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR. Tell them that you will not speak to them until they can talk more nice. You may even talk to them about what is really bothering them. Is it because they didn't get enough sleep the night before, or they just can't handle these trips. Talk it thru, communicate, communicate! And take time out for yourself, too.
4. Good luck! Parenting is hard and takes a lot of work to get it to work right.

Answer 8

I just try to get my child out of the situation as fast as possible. If I am at the grocery store or some other retail place, I try to keep a straight face and ignore the child's behavior as I finish up my business. If my child won't cooperate and walk out, I carry her like a sack of potatoes - either over my shoulder or under my arm sideways. I don't want to be arguing or pleading with my child in public.

Answer 9

You tell the child your final decision and then ignore them to the point where they see nothing is being accomplished, but don't just ignore the child and have people wondering who they belong to. If a child sees that their behavior is getting them nowhere, they will correct it themselves. You may try deterring the child from whatever they are having a tantrum about and show them something else.

Answer 10

I tell my son that he is acting like a monster and I don't talk to monsters and he'll usually stop. Nowadays he is too big for that, (almost 4 years old) he doesn't throw tantrums...at least not in public anyway :)

Answer 11

I make sure that she is physically safe (ie. won't hit her head on anything) and basically ignore her until she's finished. Or, if I'm in a hurry I pick her up and take her to the car and let her scream it out there.

Do not spank your child! It only shows them that physical abuse is a solution for their problems. Spanking demonstrates a basic disrespect for your child as a person... would you spank a work colleague who was making you angry?