I keep telling him "no!" and not in a joking way. I am serious, it makes me feel really uncomfortable.
I don't want to get him in trouble because he's my roommates boyfriend. My roommate is pretty old and has never had a boyfriend before and may not have one again so I don't want to ruin it for her.
But I just don't like the fact that he comes into MY apartment and touches me in inappropriate places so I have to leave the room. And he's done it to other girls too.
2006-10-31 05:26:26 · 26 answers · asked by Jennifer J 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
it's not a good situation...he sounds like a dog
2006-10-31 05:30:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure that you do not want to hurt your roommates feelings, but did you ever think about the fact that if you stay quiet it could hurt her? How would you feel if you found out that your first boyfriend was acting that way? You would be hurt right? Well, think about if he was doing that to your roommate/FRIEND- it would then probably make you angry- angry for him touching your friend like that, and angry b/c he doesn't respect you enough to be with only you- you need to at least sit her down (maybe with some of the other girls too) and let her know that she can do sooo much better- don't make it sound like she will never get someone ever again- just b/c he is her first, doesn't mean he will be her last...
Good luck and I hope it all works out soon.
2006-10-31 05:40:00 · answer #2 · answered by confused 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get serious and either tell your roommate or maybe even let him know if he touches you again you are going to call the police dont you realize how many situations get out of control quickly when somwone is doing something you are not comfortable with you need to take action and protect yourself and not to be rude but you should not be worried about your roommates relationship status when you could be just a few encounters away from being raped
2006-10-31 05:37:30 · answer #3 · answered by teresak713 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time, smack him really hard in the face. I mean SMACK HIM REALLY HARD and scream at the top of your lungs to keep his fuc*ing hands off you. If this doesn't work, you need to tell your roommate. The guy is a scumbag anyway, so if you appreciate your roommate, why would you want her to be the last one to find out what he's been doing behind her back? Just because she is old doesn't mean you have to put up with this harrassment. Or do you seriously think that letting this guy feel you up against your own will is doing HER a favor? If you let him get away with this, who knows what he will try next time...
2006-10-31 14:25:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have clearly told him no, and he persists, then it is sexual assault. It also means he is cheating on your roommate. He's a jerk and she deserves better, so don't feel bad about "ruining" it for her - better to be happy, safe, and single than in an abusive, unhealthy relationship.
Your roommate needs to be made aware of what he's doing, and that she doesn't have to put up with it. Talk to her about it. If he persists and she is too timid to do anything about it, you'll have to set your foot down. Tell him he is welcome in the apartment if he keeps his hands to himself (or his girlfriend with her permission) and treats everyone respectfully; but if he insists on molesting you, you will call the police and get a restraining order.
Honestly, if he won't stop touching you when you say no, he's probably a rapist and you'll be doing all women a favor by standing up to him.
2006-10-31 05:36:35 · answer #5 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand you not wanting to "ruin" it for your roomy.
But first thing's first.
Respect.
Being someones roommate means taking into action that "responsibility".
A balance must be met between the two parties involved.
(Example:Your roommate & you).
Which means you are fully held accountable for your own actions,-(& whatever,or whomever,friends,family,boyfriend,etc,-related to you).
Your roommate has to be made clear you are offended by the BF.
Proceed with a solution to this situation,ASAP.
(Here's a Hypothetical Q:"How would SHE like it if your BF @ present kept touching her inappropriately-despite her firmly telling him No!!".....????
The fact that he's even on the premisis would,in truth,-be YOUR fault.You know what I'm saying?)
That there space is rightfully yours.
Your roommate ought to respect you,& your space.
The BF,-that dirty pig there,who is audaciously dispeccable towards you has to be out of the scene,-if he CANNOT stop it immediately.
You,-do NOT deserve to be treated in such a manner.
No,-you are not gonna be "ruining" anything for your roommate.
She certainly does not know what sort of guy she's with.Or,-if she does,-shame on her.
First and foremost,-is respecting your roommate.
Meaning,-she BETTER take your needs into consideration.
She may be older than you,-but clearly,-she should grow-Up!!
2006-10-31 06:37:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you have a relationship with your roomate, I would tell her right away. She might feel more betrayed if you don't tell her what is going on. If you don't have a strong relationship, confront him first tell him I don't play that way and if you continue, you will no longer be allowed in the apartment. If it goes any further that that, he must be banned from the apartment and you will have to call the police and press charges. NO ONE has the right to touch you, if you don't want to be touched! The longer it goes on the harder it will be to stop.
2006-10-31 05:40:00 · answer #7 · answered by Mel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seriously, you need to put your foot down. If he does it again, a kick in the nuts would be appropriate. Then get out fast, go to a safe place, and call the police and report him for sexual battery. You can not allow this to continue. If he treats women like this in thier own home, how does he treat your roommate in private? She needs to get away from him, too. Do her the favor, get rid of this as shole.
2006-11-01 03:53:13 · answer #8 · answered by michaelsmaniacal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget all that "my roommates never had a boyfriend before" stuff. The first thing is to take care of yourself. Tell him loudly, "NO"! It's okay if she breaks up with him because he's no good anyway, and she is not desperate or doesn't have to be.
2006-10-31 05:37:45 · answer #9 · answered by starmoishe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look him in the eye, tell him it is innapropriate then tell him if he does it again you will tell the police. If that doesn't work hit him with a baseball bat.
What he is doing is sexual abuse to you and may even be against the law. When will you make a stand? When he rapes you?
Maybe you could get a bigger man than he is to explain it to him, or even get the police.
2006-10-31 06:22:21 · answer #10 · answered by johnno K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him if he keeps it up, you're going to tell your roommate. You should be warned, though, if you have to tell her, because she will defend him (not believe that he is doing this). Or maybe a good swift kick down there!!! Also, if you tell your roommate, she may ask you to move (unless she lives with you). Good luck.
2006-10-31 05:39:52 · answer #11 · answered by Kelly45 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋