he told me he never wanted to see me or talk to me again. that was when i was 7 and i am now 18 but i want to get to know my dad. please help me
2006-10-31 03:44:53 · 20 answers · asked by Jackie j 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Write him a letter. Tell him how you feel and get your thoughts on paper. It will give you a chance to organize it all into one coherent thought! Make sure it doesn't sound threatening, just tell him how you feel.
If nothing happens, you are better off without a father anyway! And at least you got your feelings out there! Trust me, I would have rather had no father than the one I did have! I am 24! I haven't spoken to my father since I moved out of the house when I was 18! Called and threatened to kill me about 2 weeks before my wedding because he wasn't invited! Trust me honey, some fathers are better off absent!
2006-10-31 03:51:23 · answer #1 · answered by April M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are an awesome person for being willing to put that horrible hurt behind you and try again.
Eleven years is long time. He may regret his outburst. He may be so ashamed he just cannot bring himself to contact you.
I suggest that you make the first move. Write him a letter or send him a card. Tell him just what you wrote here -- that you want to get to know him. Suggest a meeting time and place. See what happens.
Be hopeful, but be prepared to be disappointed.
Good luck to you.
2006-10-31 12:40:54 · answer #2 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well....he probably had some situation or circumstances when you was 7 now you are 18...after 11 years any man would change and your dad is no different. He probably misses you too and probably finding ways to spend time with you so why dont you take the first step and go to his favorite sports game with him or something....hope it works out with you.
2006-10-31 11:51:57 · answer #3 · answered by Ashi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't push your luck girl, my dad doesn't want to have anything to do with me either... And I have stopped hoping...I'm 37 and as my grandfather (dad's father) told me to let go it's his lost not yours. He has missed a wonderful daughter any father would wish to have and let time be the judge...Just wait for the time when he's matured enough to accept you but i promise you dear he will never rest until he made amends...Smile you're not alone!
2006-10-31 11:50:46 · answer #4 · answered by Rochelle5969 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad sounds like a horrible person. He should be lucky to have a child like you even after what he said to you as a kid you still want to know him. Have you tried to contact him recently? Maybe what he said back then he didn't really mean. You will never know if you don't try.
2006-10-31 12:04:55 · answer #5 · answered by rach 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As much as you may naturally want to know you father, it may not be a good idea. Any parent that would tell a child that they never wanted to see or talk to them is sick. He abandoned you and that's not fair nor is it right. I think it's admirable that you want to know him, but just remember what he did to you and finding him again may hurt you. Good Luck!
2006-10-31 11:53:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you should take the first step and call him. tell him its your daughter and tell him that you are ok and that you love him. even if he doesnt want to talk to you at least you know that you went out of your way and did your part. My father and I werent speaking either. (i asked him if he loved me and he wouldnt answer) but then my aunt told me that its no good holding hate in your heart. just say something to him anything. and even if he doesnt want to hear it, he is going to remeber it. and you never know. he might be different this time arround
2006-10-31 11:59:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dad has some serious issues... He probably upset at the time, maybe not with you, but with his situation. He was not supposed to say that to you, but if he did so what. Find out about him, for he did create you and probably doe not feel that way anymore.
2006-10-31 11:51:44 · answer #8 · answered by Jayde 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that is really how he feels there is not much you can do about it. Has there been any contact at all between you and your father since you were 7? If not, it is unlikely he will have changed but you can always try. I wish you luck!
2006-10-31 11:50:06 · answer #9 · answered by mnwomen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be careful of what you wish for.
Do you know how to contact him ? Have you spoken to him at all since you were 7 years old ?
2006-10-31 13:01:24 · answer #10 · answered by jarhed 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋