I've recently been offered an incredible opportunity with my company to start a division in a beautiful part of the country. The quality of life and opportunities for my children are so much better there. We aren't sure of when we'll move, but we've let everyone know, in case we get short notice. The money is also excellent, and it's something I'll enjoy. My wife's family is appauled that we would even consider it. The major reason they cite is that it would mean they wouldn't see our family as much. They pass by our house every day, and go months and months without seeing us anyway. They have quit talking to us and are being completely rude. No support, congrats...nothing but anger. It don't think they are so concerned about not seeing us. Does anyone know why they would act like this? I got nothing.
2006-10-31 02:40:24 · 15 answers · asked by Brad 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Wife and kids very excited - all for it.
2006-10-31 02:47:18 · update #1
It's not cross country, just 4 hrs away! Can't talk to them, they ignore us. Just confusing.
2006-10-31 03:00:19 · update #2
I believe it is a convenience for them right now to have you and your family accessible and if you move away that means you won't be just down the road. You have to do what is best for your family and they need to realize that. Please do not let them sway your decision. They will come to their senses and if not it is their loss.
2006-10-31 02:48:01 · answer #1 · answered by txmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Immaturity for one. If you all don't spend time together any way it could be also they may feel when the time comes and they 'just want to drop in', that opportunity would no longer be there for them.
Change is one of the hardest things for people to do and accept.
Family ties/bonds should be good ones, try to put the pride aside and make amends before this change happens, if it does. Show your wife and the family you are a man and want this issue resolved.
Communicate. (with them)
Best of Luck
2006-10-31 10:55:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because they are self-centered and selfish. Don't let them emotionally balckmail you. Do what is best for YOUR FAMILY.
What is your wife telling them? Does she want to move? Are the kids excited about it? If your wife and kids are telling them they don't want to go, then it makes you look like a monster for taking them away. So talk to your family, adn if they support the move and your career, then tell your wife to put her family in their place.
Or just forget about it. they sound like small minded people - and they are upset because they know if they can't even pop by for a visit when you are local, they KNOW they will never put in the effort to visit you far away. They probably don't realize that they are ACTUALLY upset because what has been pointed out is how poorly behaved they have been in the past.
2006-10-31 10:45:28 · answer #3 · answered by KB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They will be inconvenienced but they will just have to deal with it. If they have a telephone or the internet they can still keep in contact with the children. You have to do what is best for you and yours. Four hours away, hell we do those kinds of trips to get groceries. They could come stay long weekends or holidays.
PS some dads really don't like to have their baby girls taken away by some man - they can't help the feeling - they are dad's.
2006-11-01 00:06:01 · answer #4 · answered by obenypopstar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If offered the opportunity to improve your life style , for you and your Family .
Go for it !
It's your life not theirs .
Your Family is being selfish .
They should be happy for you , and help you , by showing support .
They should understand that it is not easy for you either , but you have to think about the future of your Family .
I know exactly how you feel , I went through the same thing .
Focus on your Family .
2006-10-31 10:55:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They probably perceive it as your way of getting away from them. They're hurt that you would consider moving away from them, and they think it's because you don't like them.
Give them time to get used to the idea, and talk to them. Explain why you're doing it and emphasise the fact it's not to get away from them, but rather to improve your own lives. Also mention that you'll still see them regularly. Its a conversation that both you and your wife should have with them.
2006-10-31 12:27:14 · answer #6 · answered by Strange1am 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The heart of the matter is, everyone must make the decision about what is going to be best for their family. When her parents/family got married, they made decisions about where to raise their families, now it is your turn. We were faced with this same decision last year. We made the move and people are adjusting to it. Do what is best for YOUR family...
2006-10-31 10:44:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's called parental control...you have the support of your spouse and that's all that matters. You are doing what is best for your family, and if the in-laws are p****d off, oh well. They will get over it, and if they don't, it doesn't sound like you have suffered any loss, but they will---and that is on them and their behavior. Go for it!!! And Good Luck.
2006-10-31 11:07:17 · answer #8 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what is best for your family. They may be feeling hurt that you are moving but they need to look at the big picture. Just do what is best and it will work out.
2006-10-31 11:24:15 · answer #9 · answered by mnwomen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you're there. Even though they go for months without seeing you your still there. There's something nice about that. There's the option of stopping by. Moving away removes that option.
2006-10-31 10:46:22 · answer #10 · answered by JB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋