Hi, I've noticed a pattern I have of having relationships with men who are elaborate liars. None have gone so far as to cheat and I'm sure of this, but they will not be honest about small things, like if they were working or at the bookstore, etc., and this happens over and over. If anyone has experience with something similar and has an idea why this occurs, I'd appreciate your advice!
2006-10-30 23:31:17 · 7 answers · asked by lulu 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Joe, I refuse to be doomed, lol! That's why I'm asking, I want to change this.
2006-10-30 23:36:02 · update #1
Well, I can say I'm almost 100% sure they haven't cheated. I'm onto that type of thing,I think things stopped at flirting. I honestly think I'm pretty aware.
It's more about strange little meaningless lies, it's more the disrespect of them lying to me I'm concerned with rather than what they are actually lying about. It's very painful for me to be treated like this, and I just want to do eveything I can to understand and stop this pattern.
2006-10-31 00:03:02 · update #2
Hopey - thanks so much for the response! Lying is the worst thing you can do to me, I take it very seriously. I feel like small lies are a sign of disrespect for my feelings and if my partner disrespects me,where will that lead in the future? I don't have anything to hide and I don't have a reason to lie, why should my partner?
2006-10-31 00:06:07 · update #3
All I can tell you is my own experience. Actually I posted a question yesterday about this. My guy was seeing another girl and now they are "just friends" which she confirms. I whole heartedly believe if they lie about the small stuff they will lie about the big stuff as well.
Lying is big with me and I call him on it every time. Now don't get me wrong I have done some things I am not proud of to catch him (looking at his bank statement, cell phone, cell phone bill that sort of thing) which is clearly an invasion of his privacy. Not that I justify it but I feel I owe it to myself to seek the truth.
You don't deserve being lied to especially if it is innocent. If he is lying about his whereabouts then where is he that he can't be honest? You have to go with your gut.
Even though my guy has lied I know that he does care about me, but he shouldn't be lying and ultimately you can't build a relationship on lies. The trust won't be there.
2006-10-31 00:02:28 · answer #1 · answered by Hopey 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why this occurs? perhaps, the need to be loved, nurtured, understood, etc. Don't allow your emotions to control you. It may be difficult, but pray about it and God will help you. All of us have been given a built in lie detector from God. Call it intuition, sixth sense, something just didn't seem right, etc. When you feel a certain way about a particular thing, your bells are going off because you have proned in on something. You might not be able to put your finger on it, but if it's there, it's there for a reason. If these people are lying about the small things, trust me, in the long run, it will be so easy to lie about major things: that million dollar investment that he didn't ask your permission to use your money, that child he has that lives out of state while away on a business trip, an expensive drug habit that you had no clue about, etc. I'm not being a man basher, I've just experienced it first hand. Don't take it lightly. Just avoid it at all costs, no matter how charming they appear to be.
2006-10-31 07:45:12 · answer #2 · answered by cutesensiblechic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These men surely have something to hide. Something bigger than whatever the small little trivial things they are usually lying about...
They lie because they want to test how gullible and stupid you can get, and if you even believe in all the small things they lie about, they know they are ready to drop the big bomb on you...and even then you won't notice.
One thing for sure, go with your instincts. Once you feel that a guy is not honest with you, confront him or leave him.
2006-10-31 07:36:59 · answer #3 · answered by vintageprincess72 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
many girls unknowginly seek out someone who resembles their father. If your father was a liar or didn't keep his word then your doomed to a life of looking for a man who acts the same way.
2006-10-31 07:34:56 · answer #4 · answered by joeknockz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard to say why your a magnet for people like this. It must be something you subconsciously seek out in a man.>
2006-10-31 07:39:31 · answer #5 · answered by Captain Comment 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well ask him your lucky thats all i just found out well im pretty shore my EX was cheating on me! so dont wait to long!
2006-10-31 07:33:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just wondering, how are u SURE that NONE of them have cheated on u? ? ?
2006-10-31 07:56:46 · answer #7 · answered by Nick A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋