i recently asked a guy out, via a note i left on his windscreen, he just text me to say he wasnt very good at dating/relationships and that it wasnt me, but that he was stuck in his ways and that he was a grumpy git....
so should i persue and try to convince him that its worth a go? just for a meal or a drink? i like him, although i dont know him very well and i am more experienced than him in the dating game....
any advice from guys or gals would be gratefully received....
PS: his dad thinks it would be a good idea to go on a date with me, not that that helps me at all, but its always nice to have the in-laws on side!
2006-10-30 21:46:26 · 9 answers · asked by kt_sub2000 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
maybe you should try being friends with him first respect the fact that he was up front with you about not being good at relationships and just go with the flow and maybe something will develop after you guys connect on a friend level
2006-10-30 21:51:17 · answer #1 · answered by insane illusions 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea what's wrong with a mael or drink. Well don't let him feel like he's under presure, Let him Know you are a friend and he just might have fun. Don't be overpowering about it eather thats allways a turn off , maybe present it to him that at least hell be out and able to look around if he's not interested that may be the way to go I was a very shy guy and now wish that i wouldn't have been but id get scared of others and didnt want to be there. Maybe he's gay and afraid if thats the case and you still want the friend then maybe somthing alone together might work Does he think he's ugly if that then tell him that thats a treable thing he's thinking everyone is beutifull he may not see that maybe he fills inferer about himself weather loks body or size were all good and your more than comfortable to be seen with him so get his a out of that kind of thinking whatever it is be pationt , dont push to much a littl can go a long way hey however he is he must be somthing your into him or a very good friend maybe alot of talking openly with him is it he may not no how to comunicat like he wants and that will pin a person up for a long time I don't know him but bet hed be worth nowing everyone has somuch more than they even think know or see inthemselfs if its his body well thats can be worked with as far as stuck in his ways well his limeted himself to no new experencese in life and thats sad It is very hard for shy guy's unless you no whats the real problem hes having If by chance he's gay then again he's missing so much pleasure of good friends and you never han have enough friends at the moment i casnt think of somthing to say to him but you must be a friend you do care or youd be saying f you a . there somthing in him try to find it ooppen him up life goes so fast and when he realizes the time hes wasting that will only be more discoureging to him do what you can but if he's not showing you any respect on your thopughts bring that to his attention and if he is your friend then the respect has be be mutual if not dont wast your time I do hope you try dont give up to fast sometimes it just takes awile and i really hope it's not him thinking his to small or his bodys ugly whis i could have a chat whith him about that hes lucky your still talking and careing hope he see's thAT IN YOU I DO i DONT KNOW HE NEEDS TO SNAP OUT OF IT BEFORE IT BECOMES REALLY BAD LET HIM AND YOU BE WHO YOU ARE THATS THE JOY OF PEOPLE BEING DIFFERENT hope somthing works for you and for him being that down can lead to things I domt even whant to thinl about .
2006-10-31 06:32:19 · answer #2 · answered by mcoldplay310 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahahaha...You already are looking as his Dad as an in-law and not just a Dad that wants to see his son go out and have some fun...Cute.
Since he returned your message why not just text him and tell him the option is still open should he ever want to get together and leave it at that!
If you hear from him fine, who knows he might just be a grumpy stuck in the mud sort of fellow and why would you want to waste your time on that?
Clearly in his message I hear he is backing out though by saying it isn't you, so this is something to pay attention to. If this is just a ploy to get you to really put yourself out there you need to think over if this is something you want to do...Remember you are setting the stage for a friendship and have extended your hand. What most folks want is someone to reciprocate, not someone you have to lead all the time.
If it is because he does not feel that great about himself and doesn't know how to handle being asked you might try adding in your text that you asked him out because you thought he was interesting or something in that order. Remember you are wanting to have fun, not be a therapist for someone...that is unless that is what you want.
It doesn't sound like you are going to get much out of it, but hey, it's worth a try. One try, don't overdo it you may get your feelings hurt.
Let us know how it goes.
2006-10-31 05:56:22 · answer #3 · answered by Coco 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all it sounds like he's not shy he just wants to be left alone. You could at least ask him out to his face instead of leaving him a note. A note is so thrid grade-esque. Secondly, if his parents are telling him to go on a date with you of course he won't. Anyone who is young enough to get dating advice from their parents things they are old enough to not need it. Meal and a drink dates are over rated. Same with movies. Invite him to do soemthing interesting with you. The worst thing you could do to a shy person is take them on a date where they have to sit across from you and eat. Many shy people are very self-conscious about eating. I think you blew it though with the note.
2006-10-31 05:57:35 · answer #4 · answered by AJ F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think you want to date this guy let his dad put the pressure on. You need to back off. There are to many fish in the sea for you to worry about one, unless he is that special. Let his dad know how you feel and ask for his help. But remember this guy may be right about himself, so dont get your hopes up, even if he says yes to a date. Good Luck
2006-10-31 06:20:25 · answer #5 · answered by MeToo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because the guy is very shy it would be best for you to take the first steps. YOU ask him out on a date. Maybe somewhere open at first, like a coffee shop or a cafe during the day. If wll goes well then maybe you could go out to dinner or a movie. Good luck, my son is very quiet and he needs a girl to ask him out.
2006-10-31 05:51:55 · answer #6 · answered by jojammum48 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if hes a shy guy dont wait on him asking you out or bringing that subject up again... you will need to ask him yourself. you will be direct in a nice way of course and ask him out....if he likes you he will ofcourse agree and eventually open up...but if he gives you some sorry a** excuse again then that should make it clear for you...
2006-10-31 05:51:45 · answer #7 · answered by MR.E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeh...maybe he has a bit of inferiority complex in him..^_^
Well, all I can say is that you must make him feel confident. Keep asking him out and tell him that you like him, that'll make him confident......atleast a bit...^_6
2006-10-31 07:22:38 · answer #8 · answered by Romeo (The Original) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone (he is useless) and come to me baby
2006-10-31 06:01:32 · answer #9 · answered by Dog 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋