If a married couple is of two different religious faiths, what religion do you raise your children in?

Question

Do you raise them with beliefs of both faiths or do you pick one religion over the other?

Answer 1

let them choose when they grow up

Answer 2

Well I am a single mom and an atheist. I am raising my child with exposure to as many beliefs as possible, I answer her questions as best I can and trust that she'll reach her own decision when she is ready. It isn't easy and sometimes you have to tell them that you just don't know and nobody does that it all comes down to what you personally believe. I did not have her babtised-again she can decide for herself when she is ready. My mom is horrified but eventually she shut up about it. I'm comfortable with how I'm raising her and I see her turnign into a lovely little girl. I think that's all any of us can do-provide the tools and hope they can make it. As far as unevenly yoked...well it isn't like parents usually agree on everything anyway right? So why would different religions (or lack there of) be different? It's all about being a good parent-you don't put you child in the middle of anything unless you want a messed up kid. So I would imagine that the people who care that much that their child is the same as them would only marry the same religion in the first place. I think it is actually a non-issue.

Answer 3

My god, someone actually said Catholic and Christian are two different religions. Geez, I thought Catholics were christian. She must mean Catholic and Protestant.
Anyway, I'm 60, & what I've observed is that children not raised in either religion don't become religious. I have two sisters who married people of different faiths & all four stopped attending their own churches & their children were raised without one. Two of the children don't believe in God. 38% of Americans say they go to church weekly per a recent ABC poll. That's not very good & I suspect it will continue to decline.
If the parents continue to practice their own religion, I would suggest that the children attend one church one week & the other the next. Then the child can decide when old enough to make the decision.

Answer 4

My friends parents are Jewish and Christian. Each parent observed their own religion and they took turns taking the kids to their respective religious days. For the end of the year, they celebrated Christmakkauh and decorated the home with a tree, dreidels, a menorah, and cooked both Christmas cookies and traditional Jewish fare.

I always thought that this was really cool and open-minded of them. Both children from the family were never asked or pressured to make a religious choice and both of them came to separate conclusions. One of them married a man from a Catholic Hispanic family. Now in addition to having potato latkas and gingerbread men at their holiday table, they get to include enchiladas and tamales.

It's always best to inform the kids of all possibilities and let them know that the decision is theirs. That way they know that what they have chosen is what they truly believe.

Answer 5

There is no right formula for this. My husband and I were denominationally different and when we compared and contrasted he felt comfortable making a change to mine.

His parents chose to stay their own religions and raised him his mom's religion but he was brought up to follow both traditions in terms of holiday.

I have a great friend who is a pastor and he suggests if both are Christian to pick a new denomination that you both like if no one wants to make a change.

It's never easy because belief is so personal and important and you can't imagine not sharing it with your kids...but marriage is about comprimise.

Answer 6

It's totally up to the couple. There is no one right answer. It depends on the strength and importance of the faith of each parent and what the faith teaches about the upbringing of children.

I know it is a difficult situation, but it can be worked out...and if worked out successfully...will make the family unit stronger for it.

Answer 7

im not a parent so i cant say. this is exactly why individuals of different religions are not advised to marry. the Bible says "do not be unequally yoked" menaing dont pair yourself with someone who doesnt believe the same things you do. Opposites really do NOT attract, that rule only applys to magnets and football. i think the child should belive what he/she chooses, but dont raise your child according to what i say. i have two cousins who live in a split religion home (mother is protestant and father is catholic) and i can see them heading down the path to destruction.

Answer 8

Down to personal choice between the parents involved, but in the eyes of the law the woman's religion wins.

Answer 9

This is really difficult. We're trying to find a church that fits all our needs. It's not an easy task. I'm Nazarene, he's Catholic, right now we're going to a Baptist church, but haven't committed to anything yet. Even in the Christian religion, it can be really tough. We talk about each issue as it is, and go from there.

Answer 10

You raise them with the understanding that all faith is sacred and that one of you sincerely believes in one faith and the other parent believes equally strongly in another. Let them experience both, and when they reach adulthood they can make an informed decision.
God will love them equally, irrespective of which one they choose.

Answer 11

This is why interfaith marrages never work. Even if it is agreed upon before marrage it is not a good idea because things change. People are the least religious around the time of marrage but start to get more religious when they have children.

I think it is better to give kids one identy than to let them choose.