I'm 21 and recently moved 600 miles from my mom. she suffers with manic depression and 3 weeks ago quit taking her lithium cold turkey. She knows what this does to her but she said that she just couldnt take being on meds anymore and quit. She said that her dr prescribed her an anit-physicotic drug instead but she doesnt want to take it either. Shes been on lithium for 10 years and i know how she was before she was finally diagnosed. She was depressed, slept alot, had really bad mood swings, would black out and attack people who made her mad and just little things that most of us take for granete she couldnt accomplish alone. I'm so worried about her and wonder if my moving away pushed her to this. I'm her youngest child and the only one of her 3 kids that she raised. Shes been under alot of stress lately with that and starting to build her new house. I just need to know what to do. thanks for anyone that answers with real answers.
2006-10-30 14:30:35 · 10 answers · asked by crystalyn129 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
thanks to everyone whos responed so far. I realize that i cant help her unless she wants to help herself. But being I was the one who has been with her since day 1 and seen everything that she has endured over the years I feel so guilty. I put her though alot of stuff growing up and my dad was no where to be found when she really could have used his help with me. I guess now that im older I see the things that my behavior caused. I just cant help but to feel like this. I never thought she would just quit. I knew shes never took it how its suppossed to be taken (shes always took 1/2 of what she was suppossed to) but now im just so worried that she will try to hurt herself. I know that my step dad looks after her but I guess that I feel like no one knows my mom like i do. I've always taken care of her and now that i can i feel completely helpless.
2006-10-30 16:27:31 · update #1
It is not unusual for a mental patient who is bi-polar to stop meds. They think they are ok and that they don't need them. They think everyone else is like them. One sure thing is that a bi-polar person (manic/depressive) has no empathy for anyone elses problems, including yours. The world centers around them. They are hard to treat because of this and ofen antisocial. And yes, they get depressed but they're not going to take that med either. It's a control thing. It's the illness. If you can keep her in therapy that's your best chance. But other than that, she's going to do what she wants. Bi-polars create alot of their own stress and then make sure it spills over into every aspect of their lives. You should learn as much as you can about the disease. You didn't cause it or have anything to do with it. Get yourself some therapy to learn to cope. Godloveya.
2006-10-30 16:43:19 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. That sucks. Sorry for your mom. However, your moving away may appear to cause her problems, but those problems have always been there. I do not think that moving back would help.
I can see her not wanting the drugs. Lots of doctors prescribe drugs because it is an easy fix. If their is a chemical imbalance in her brain, I would recommend that she begin taking the drugs, again. If it is a psychological problem, she needs to find the cause and deal with that.
I know what manic depression is like, but I don't know how to cure it. She can relieve the problems through proper diet, exercise, and eliminating the use of drugs and alcohol. Getting rid of her stress factors will also be of great benefit. I found that writing also helps.
I learned a writing exercise that helped me analyze and discover the things that were contributing to the depression.
I would write questions down on paper using my right hand, and write the answers with my left. Just starting off with simple questions that you might ask someone the first time you met them. Do this for about an hour every day.
I hope she finds something that will help her.
2006-10-30 22:53:57 · answer #2 · answered by GORDO BLAKHART 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, she's the mom, not you. There is nothing you can do other than lovingly remind her why she got on the meds in the first place. This is VERY common in manics. They feel great, think they don't need the meds and quit, read up on bi-polar, the Internet is a great place for info. google bi-polar disorder. Don't take responsibility for your mom's decisions. She is an adult, she knows the consequences, she is just in denial right now. Be there to love her, from a distance, but DO NOT let her drag you into her "insanity," let her know you love her but until she is on meds, you can not be a part of her decision. Unfortunately you have to use parental ta tics with your parent. you can't do this for her and you don't want to, it has to be her or it is not real and won't last. Good luck
2006-10-30 22:47:41 · answer #3 · answered by zekemarie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont feel guilty u moved away manics have a habit of stopping their pills whether u are around or not they go off their meds either because they do not like the side effects or they like the manic high they get when not on medication call her doctor who is prescribing her pills for her he may not be able to talk to you because of consent issues, but he can listen to your concerns also talk to her MD and any other health professional, family, or people who u feel can keep an eye on her or help her out when she needs it hope this helps try not to worry and go on with your life and keep in touch with her
2006-10-30 23:11:53 · answer #4 · answered by zeek 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! You are not responsible! Mentally ill patients are often given to going off their meds...getting into trouble...and having to start over again. It would really be hard to find someone who has not just "tried" going off their meds! You really, really want to believe that you don't need them. No matter how long you are on medication, that belief is very hard to give up. It's not you...it's just the nature of the illness. You need your life and your space...that is what she raised you for! YOU are her success!
2006-10-30 23:16:09 · answer #5 · answered by KathieJo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think she is trying to guilt you home? She is an adult, she has been taking her meds long enough to know what will happen when she doesn't take them....do not feel responsible for her decision to quit taking them. You have a right to your own life. Don't run back home because she is making a decison you know is a bad one...Its hard watching people we love hurt themselves when they know better...but sometimes you just have to take care of yourself. No easy answers to this one....
2006-10-30 22:38:31 · answer #6 · answered by Barbiq 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother needs a supportive doctor who will help get her off meds. Dr. Peter Breggin wrote a great book about what your mom is going through, & how to help.
The book is called, "Your drug may be your problem", i purchased mine on amazon.com.
The information is invaluable.
Help her, perhaps read it yourself to understand.
All the best.
2006-10-31 00:05:10 · answer #7 · answered by Chloe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may have, but do not blame yourself. Your mom knows you need a life and you need to live it. Having depression affects everything and everyone. Just talk with her a lot and let her know you are there for her.
2006-10-30 22:39:28 · answer #8 · answered by cfoxwell99 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't help her if she won't take her lithium. Get a good therapist and develop a plan to help you.
2006-10-30 22:49:34 · answer #9 · answered by Buffy Summers 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her help . Mf Gf died today because of that
2006-10-30 22:38:37 · answer #10 · answered by lorenzo p 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋