Earlier today I saw a post on here where a woman was talking about hiring a private eye to investigate her daughters boyfriend. Somebody mention the link http://background-records.net/ as a good place to find info online. Well I checked out the site and entered my sisters boyfriends name and found out that he was convicted of armed robbery in 1999. I know this is him because the name, date of birth, and address are all the same. I am sure my sister doesn't know (and I am damn sure our dad doesn't know).......should I tell my sister or our dad? I don't know how to handle this situation.
2006-10-30 13:06:56 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Law Enforcement & Police
First go to your sister with the info. Make sure that you tell her that you wanted her to know because you love her and want to know that she is safe. If she doesn't change the situation go to your father. Just remember people can change but it is a little weird that he hasn't mentioned it. Maybe he has maybe you just don't know. If he has been honest with her I would be watchful and encourage her to tell your father.
2006-10-30 13:14:30 · answer #1 · answered by spirit filled 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Um...I would just casually ask your sister about her boyfriend. Don't get into specifics about his criminal activity, but maybe mention it when you're discussing similar subject matter. Don't tell your dad (unless your sister is like 12 years old, its not really any of his business). Chances are, your sister probably already knows about her boyfriends past. Also, you risk looking like a snooping ***** if you mention that you looked up his criminal background. Then your sister will probably not confide in you again if she thinks you're spying on her.
Take it from me, a girl knows when she's dating a guy with a criminal background (Not that I would know from personal experience..wink wink). He's probably already told her.
At the risk of sounding rude, most of the advice given by others is totally ridiculous. If your sister is a grown *** woman then why is it a big deal that she's dating a guy that was in jail for armed robbery? Who cares? If he did his time, and its behind him, why are you so concerned. Jesus, you people need to chill out. There are convicted criminals around you all day long, and you don't even know it...b/c...SUPRISE...they're people just like you and me. Give them a damn break!
2006-10-30 13:35:12 · answer #2 · answered by tangyterp83 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm a police officer in Texas. Let me give you a different answer than everyone else.
If you know this guy wel enough go to him. Tell him that you know and that you would like him to tell your sister about it. Tell him that he has a week and that it is the adult thing to do. After a week you're going to tell your sister.
This gives him a chance to save face since it happened 7 years ago. That is a while.
Don't worry about dad. Let him find out on his own if ever. It's not his business but it is your sister's business. Let her make the choice.
Doing it this way also makes it so that the guy doesn't hate you guts because you are up front and honest with him too.
2006-10-30 17:38:24 · answer #3 · answered by FL_FunGuy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If i was you i would go to my dad an talk to him about it and suggest you both go to the boyfriend in a non attack way and talk to him about it...it was a long time ago and maybe he didnt have a huge involvement maybe he was there at the time but wasnt invoved physically. Its easy to make assumptions but better to find out the facts . Be honest tell him how you found out but dont do it alone just in case you get a violent reaction ....safety to you comes first.
2006-10-30 13:19:11 · answer #4 · answered by blue_eyed_woman_of_3 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She has a correct to charm to close yet please keep in mind the old saying of "kill the messenger." You went in the back of her decrease back and snooped, and alongside with owing her an apology for doing so, now you've undesirable information to impart. searching on your relationship such as her, she will not in any respect experience an same about YOU, and would absolutely be uncomfortable round you. also do not anticipate her to ditch the guy. If the guy hasn't achieved something contained in the ultimate seven years, he became sensible adequate to study his lesson. My husband has been in federal reformatory for 26 years, serving a 40-one years sentence. reformatory is organic hell. it isn't glamourous and crammed with quite boy punks like the television shows and videos. it really is a terrible position, and the sensible ones who spend time there promise themselves they'll not in any respect go decrease back. This guy might want to be a a lot more suitable human being than the favourite guy if he's achieved time. he's taken under consideration stuff he might want to not in any respect allow you to comprehend about, and lived the way maximum persons might want to not understand. He in all likelihood has an appreciation for freedom that very few human beings understand. So don't be too quick to guage. enable her comprehend, then step decrease back. She might want to be furious with you for checking up on him in the back of her decrease back, and be conscious your action as a betrayal, fairly now that it will replace each and every thing about her relationship with him. So do not anticipate "oh thanks!" anticipate some anger, some denial, marvel, and take care of it like an human being. You snooped, era, and owe her an apology. it could be the suitable component that ever befell to her, yet I wager that is going to take awhile for her to appreciate it. good luck to both absolutely one of you.
2016-12-05 09:29:29 · answer #5 · answered by harbert 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time you are talking to your sister about this guy, ask her, "Hey, what did he steal in 99 again?" Like she already told you about it, and then when she says, "what????" then say, something like "Oh, I thought you told me.... uh must have been somebody else... I know a site where we can check for sure."
Have HER look him up and SHE discovers it and decides what to do.
Or have her over.. say you found this really cool site, look yourselves up, then leave her in the room to look him up... it's a natural thing to do... look up your boyfriend or family members. Then you aren't the bad guy saying things about her boyfriend.
Could be she knows and just doesn't feel comfortable telling you and your dad.
2006-10-30 13:15:20 · answer #6 · answered by Dawn J 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He did his time and you should MYOB. This is what is wrong with the world today . He made a big even hugh mistake OK he was punished big time let him tell his own dirty deeds and you move on with your own life what if the shoe were on the other foot think before you react is all I have to say.
2006-10-30 23:11:19 · answer #7 · answered by yahoo 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, you should tell her what you found out. Then let her decide for herself if she wants to continue seeing him or not. People do change. And it's also possible it's another person with the same name.
2006-10-30 13:15:12 · answer #8 · answered by booktender 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Normally, I'd say to mind your own business, but this is more serious as he committed a crime of violence. I'd tell your sister even though I'm sure it's just about the last thing that she wants to hear.
2006-10-30 13:09:33 · answer #9 · answered by dingobluefoot 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would tell your sister asap. She needs to know that she is dealing with a dangerous felon. She doesn't need to let him know why she would no longer be seeing him. Whether she tells him or not, his response will tell her whether she needs to be worried. If so, then I would tell your father. Otherwise, what he doesn't know won't hurt him. Let's hope that your sister shows good judgment.
2006-10-30 13:15:52 · answer #10 · answered by Judith 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋