i really need help. i need to forget this person i love so much for 8 years. whenever i get to know someone new or try to go into the dating scene and try to move on. why i cant seem to do it?
instead i would be thinking about him all day/night cried myself to sleep. i can't let him go despite knowing he does not love me back. sometimes i feel like a walking emotional baggage..
somehow it has an effect on how i treat other potential suitors (either i totally ignore them or i will tend to compared the suitors to the guy i love)..despite trying to cut contacts with him .. i still end up trying to find him back .. what can i do ? i really need closure of him..
2006-10-30 13:01:17 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
we talked before once and all i asked him to simply say it out right in my face that he doesnt love me at all so that i can move on . but he did not and cannot not say it . so i am pretty sure that he does not love me at all.. so everything is left out hanging unresolved...
2006-10-31 12:15:01 · update #1
You need to stop dating for awhile. Try new things and keep busy. Delete his e-mail address and phone number. Take all pics and either trash them or put them away. I know it hurts but one needs to have closure and now is the time. One can not go back but forward and some day you will look back and hopefully have good memories of him but that is all. When the right one comes along you will know and laugh about how sad it seemed at the time. Hang in there and smile bc we care and have been there. :-)
2006-10-30 13:04:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey love is a tough thing. Sorry that it is so hard for you right now. I know how you feel. My dream girl moved away from me and i never got to spend any time with her as more than just friends. I think about her all the time. I once punched a hole through a door because i found out she was hooking up with some low life. I really miss her. I havent spoken with her since she left and it has been a pretty long time now. I still feel the same way about her. So I dont think just cutting him out of your life will really help. Don't give up on him as long as you still have feelings for him because the feelings won't go away until either you get what you want from him or you meet someone better. Sorry my answer isn't really an answer. I hope it will help knowing that there are others that feel the same way. Take care, good luck.
2006-11-01 02:08:39 · answer #2 · answered by Greg P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are there any unresolved issues with this guy? Maybe the way it ended left things hanging? You need to try to deal with these issues if they are there. I had to do the same thing before I could love again. I finally called my ex and told him how I felt about the way things ended. After the conversation was over, a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. If there aren't any unresolved issues try thinking about things about this guy that make you hate him lol. When you said closure, it made me think you have issues you need to fix with him.
2006-10-30 21:07:04 · answer #3 · answered by jnhnghgrl7572002 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe the only way you will get closure is by talking to him. Find out exactly where it failed. Learn from that. Did he break up with you? I will assume so because that may be why you are having a hard time accepting it. I believe enough time may have gone on now that you can call him and just ask how he is and that you were thinking of him and for whatever reason you just wanted to say hi. remember, you're not calling him to go out again...your calling to get insight on why it's over. Maybe once that happens you will be able to move forward. My best to you.
2006-10-30 21:05:08 · answer #4 · answered by lykes2win 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know exactly how u feel, im going through the exact same thing, all u can do is focus on the fact that he doesnt love you back, and think about everything that can make him a bad person, like his attitude or the way he treats people soon youu will find someone that really does deserve u
2006-10-30 21:06:24 · answer #5 · answered by emaria 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My girlfriend was obsessed with her ex of 8 on and off years also. When we first got together I didn't know. People told me but I ignored them. Well they finally ran off together and I broke up with her. Then 3 days later she came back to me and said she did not know that she could love again,but when she left me that weekend she realized that she did love me. I know it's crazy that were still together,but she makes me happy and I love her, Anyways someone will come along and show you that they love you and give you all the attention it just takes time.
2006-10-30 21:10:14 · answer #6 · answered by sexygal8321 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget him! I had the same problem. But maybe he is hiding his feelings, on the other hand he may not be, but if a guy doesn't love you back, then don't waste your time and energy on him! Find someone 10 times better than him!
2006-10-30 21:06:08 · answer #7 · answered by jlynn0390 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think in your mind, he doesent love me. I must move on. Comparing is ok as long as it doesn't get out of hand. when the person is worst than a guy that doesnt love you, end it.
2006-10-30 21:06:06 · answer #8 · answered by animalfarm190 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go to couseling, it may help you figure out why you are so attached to this person and maybe it has more to do with other issues in you life.
2006-10-30 21:08:13 · answer #9 · answered by alter_egob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i go through the same thing. i would let it go. you never know. maybe one day your feelings will be returned.
2006-10-30 21:07:45 · answer #10 · answered by dark_lord_zephyr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋