how do i stop a 3yr old from swearing?

Question

my girlfriend also has a 3yr old . when angry he calls her mother f'er and to shut up. he gets time out for punishment. sometimes while on time out he will still swear, then he gets soap.short time later he is back at it. i was spanked and dont agree w / it, but in this case i think 2 swats on the *** will get his attention

Answer 1

Don't swear in front of him/her and do not let them think it is cute and let it get your attention... they will stop if they see it does not affect you.

Answer 2

I just (like 15 minutes ago!) put my 3 year old to bed without reading books for swearing. Her daddy has a potty-mouth (although he'll deny it to the end!). She said f-ing sh*t. I explained that was naughty and not to say it. So...she whispered it. I explained if she said it again we wouldn't read any books. Five minutes later she said, "Mommy, I won't say f-inf sh*t!" with quite the look in her eye. She new exactly what she was doing. So, we brushed her teeth, and into bed she went...immediately. I explained that next time she wants to say something inappropriate she should think about this moment, and then decide. When it started, I tried to just ignore, but it just got louder. We simply take things away, like reading books before bed, movies (which are few and far between anyway), and juice. She'll be good for a few days, and then forget. It's not too big of a problem for us. I'm pretty sure it's just a stage she'll grow out of. I do *not* think, however, that spanking is the answer...ever. All that hitting a child does is teach it to distrust the spanker (and teach them to hit of course). Why would a child listen to someone he doesn't trust???

Answer 3

Those are some strong words for a 3 year old. My son is almost 3 and he started saying stupid and ***...and to me, those are bad words. A 2 or 3 year old has no buisness saying them. I just completely ignore him and he will forget about them, because he doesnt get a reaction from me. But if it gets out of hand then with the boy, then Id spank him. That is truly a habit you dont want him getting into. Swearing deserves the swats.

Answer 4

where is he getting this language from? is it from adults or other kids at school? If it's from adults than they need to clean their mouths when their around kids. either way you need to explain to him why swearing is not ok.

my brother used to swear when he was that age. here's what i did. Every time he would swear or use rude language, i would tell him it was potty talk and he needed to go to the bathroom if he was gonna use that kind of language. i didn't make it a punishment, it was all very matter of fact. if you swear, you say it in the bathroom. he would go in there, close the door, and get it out of his system. i was very consistent with this, that is the key, if you're not consistent, nothing will work, not even spanking.

anyway, when i first started it he thought it was funny, and would go in there and yell it out. After a while though, he got tired of having to go to the bathroom every time he swore, and it tapered off pretty quickly.

hopefully this will help. just remember it's not a punishment, just a consequence, not necessarily bad. And be consistent!

good luck!

Answer 5

My grandma used to swat me on the rear with a flyswatter. To this day, I can't bring myself to buy one. But seriously, this child has not just come up with these words. He heard them, and pretty regularly.The adults need to watch their language first of all, then there has to be the same consistant discipline every time he says it. If he gets away with it even once, you send the message that it is o.k. Also, the consequence must feel like a consequence. I had one child who could be put in time out. Another of my children was very strong willed and got a few swats on the rear. But consistency is the most important thing.

Answer 6

I work with kids ALL DAY long and at the age of three you can talk it out with them (accompanied with time out) and let them know it's bad. However this will only work if NO ONE ELSE IS CUSSING IN THE HOUSE. If someone is cussing around him your are basically telling him it's okay to use these words.

But if all else fails beat him into next week every time he breaths that word and let him know why the whole time.


Also one other important thing with child rearing is developing a mean voice/face. This will let the child know when you look or speak in that way you mean bisness. The face cannot be smiling and the voice must be low and even. Hope this helps!

Answer 7

The best thing to do when toddlers swear is to not make a big deal about it. They keep doing it because they know they are getting you angry. He is old enough to learn what words are acceptable and what words aren't and if the adults in his life swear he is going to learn by example. So it's best that parents clean up their language to set the example and also to explain, (when they hear the "f" word from playmates) that the word is not acceptable and that nice people don't say those kinds of words.

My son picked it up at school and it was quite a shock when I first heard him use it, but it was the only time he did for many years, not because I smacked the living daylights out of him but because we reinforced that certain words are not used in our home.

Answer 8

For starters, don't swear in front of the child! Children are parrots and will repeat whatever they hear, especially the inappropriate stuff! My kids are older, but they have a list of words that they're not allowed to say until they're 18. Has anyone explained that those words are mean and hurt Mommy's feelings? I would suggest taking treasured toys away, one for each offense. Then he can earn them back by not swearing, one toy each day he keeps it clean. Good luck!

Answer 9

Pick a word and when ever you get mad say it with lots of emphasis. If you a slip up happens say the designated word loud and with more emphasis than the bad.
My sister used to get mad and yell "you Pontiac". She thought it was a bad word and my parents would give her lots of attention when she said. Like "Andrea you must be mad, what's wrong?" Just making a big deal of the not bad word so she would focus on that word instead of f@#$.
When swear words are used I would try to ignore it for a couple weeks. If there is no reaction it probably will stop.
It not try hot sauce.

Answer 10

no, he needs to be taught. the way he talks to his mother is outrageous and comes from a boy not having a dad who is a husband to his mother, there to teach respect for her. who is teaching him to talk to her like that? that's the problem. Soap in his mouth is abuse, and would only make him justifiably angry with her.

For most things in little kids, you make it go away by ignoring it. He loves the reaction he gets. Punishment is attention and therefore, it reinforces.

Babies/Toddlers need a good relationship with a reliable mom. Their behavior flows nicely from there. I suspect your girl friend does a pretty lousy job of parenting this poor child. Well, i know it from how he acts and how she punishes. She needs help big time.

How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk is a book about how to parent without abuse and to retain control of the family. It can help her with a new philosophy and approach to parenting. But, again, i suspect there's a lot about this boy's life that contributes to this behavior. This is clearly a case where the adults in his life are to blame.

Spanking is never a good idea and is just more of the same stupid response he's gotten so far.

Answer 11

First, children that age copy the language they hear. Don't make a federal case over his language. That just reinforces it in some kids. A three year old's brain has not fully developed long term memory and it really is possible that he forgets. I would not get into a battle of wills with a child that age. When he gets angry and swears, try making him say "Shut up, PLEASE". Lighten up. And never talk to him or your girlfriend that way. Good luck