is anybody there experiencing being an alcoholics wife ? two lovely children and loving relationship when things are ok,i feel i am juggling jellies keeping the truth or so i think from the children,at times i feel i am going crazy,my detective skills are really being put to the test and this week i am going to see a councellor regarding the alcoholism
2006-10-30 10:00:10 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
That`s really sad..... talk with him, try to find out what really bothers him, alchololics are people who are unable to cope with problems and thus drowning them in alcohol.
Try to convince him to go to consult a psychologist and other professionals.
Be strong!
2006-10-30 10:05:55 · answer #1 · answered by Ateviel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was with an alcoholic for 4 yrs (married 2). It doesnt get better.....I can tell you that honestly....They have to hit rock bottom and realize that they need help before they will accept it. My ex started having blackouts because he was having tiny strokes because of his alcohol abuse. I loved him but between the drinking and worrying and excessive lying that abuse causes....I couldnt deal with him and I wasnt going to have my children around that kind of influence anymore. No matter what my feelings for him....I divorced him 2 yrs ago and my life has been so much less stressful without him in it......If he will admit he has a problem and get help for his problem then you have a chance....but please for the sake of the children dont stay in a relationship that is unhealthy. Maybe it would be best to seperate until his alcohol abuse is resolved.
2006-10-30 10:14:10 · answer #2 · answered by kndykisz 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good move seeing a counselor. You can also go to an Al-anon meeting. This group is like AA but for families of alcoholics. The counselor will tell you this, but by keeping in this "secret" and trying to be all things to everybody, will eventually shut you down and then you won't be good to anyone. I am so proud of you for making this first step. God Bless You! You will be amazed at how different life looks when there's no hidden rocks to stumble over.
2006-10-30 10:11:39 · answer #3 · answered by RBRN 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My husband has not had a drop to drink in 5 years, but it was not always this way. It took me leaving him one night while he was on one of his binges. I packed up my whole house put everything in storage and moved myself and my 2 kids in with my parents. Yes I loved him and when he was not drinking he was the best husband and father a person could ask for but enough was enough. I told him it was either us or the drinking and stayed gone for 6 months. He chose to get help and stop drinking because he loved his family more than the beer. It took me forever to get up the courage to go but I did and it worked out for me. We went to family counseling and things are so much better now. Sometimes doing something drastic wakes them up and shows them what they are really missing out on. I wish you all the luck and hope everything works out for you.
2006-10-30 10:10:06 · answer #4 · answered by vernitta16 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The kids know something is wrong. They're young, not dumb. And they do have little self-preservation radars.
It's great that you're going to see a councellor. Try to get one for the kids too. And contact Al-Anon.
Good luck.
2006-10-30 10:03:45 · answer #5 · answered by Tigger 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would try joining your local Alanon. Its for the families of alcoholics to talk about everything and understand whats going on. They often have daycare and if your kids are young they can hang out there. If your kids are older Alateen is avaiable. Basically it helps you understand what alcoholism is and helps you figure out what you can do.
2006-10-30 11:14:58 · answer #6 · answered by tuskinini45 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The children already know something is wrong, I am an adult child of an alcoholic father...please, please, please, take care of your children first.
At the very least, blackouts represent a dangerous state in which the drinker is typically extremely impaired and at great risk of doing harm to her/himself or others.
2006-10-30 13:14:17 · answer #7 · answered by Ceajae 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take the kids and split, maybe that will shock him into action ,there is nothing you can do for him except support him AFTER he commits to being sober
2006-10-30 10:11:58 · answer #8 · answered by sterling m 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋