My friend is getting married in two weeks and has just asked me not to take my three year old (who was accepted at short notice) to the reception as it will muck up the seating plan!!!! Other people are taking similar age children so it's not that. Is she taking the piss?????
2006-10-30 09:41:02 · 37 answers · asked by yummy_mummy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If your friend was on here and said "my best girlfriend has a 3 year old daughter who I love but I just found out from the caterer and venue that having her at the reception is going to mess up the seating plan and we don't know what to do. It's only 2 weeks to the wedding and I don't want to be rude or hurt my friend's feelings...blah blah"
We would have told her...
- she'll understand
- a true friend won't mind
- she may even like the idea of being out without kids
- tell her, be honest and hope for the best
- always be truthful and just explain the situation to your friend
2006-10-30 09:52:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
you state that your daughter was ***accepted at short notice***
was she originally included on the invitation or did you ask to be able to take her along?
if the latter was the case then maybe your "friend" said yes without giving the matter any thought ; then on rethinking things - changed her decision- which she is entitle to even though it does appear rude.
really sounds like the communication between the both of you has broken down
I had something similar happen to me/my daughter 20+years ago;my sister had asked my daughter to be a flower girl ( about 6 at the time) ; then changed her mind about having children at the wedding so *un-invited * my daughter. I felt that my daughter could have still been the flower girl ; but not necessarily attend the reception.
I did attend the wedding- but stayed in the back-ground & offered no help anywhere- I had been prepared to make my sisters gown & her bridesmaids as well - but she had decided otherwise
I was rather annoyed with my sister about mjy daughter & told her at the time ** well I hope no-one ever does anything like that to a child of yours***
TALK to your friend to really find out what is going on - or suck it up & just attend on your own; then distance yourself from her afterwards
2006-10-30 11:57:57 · answer #2 · answered by fairypelican 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when it comes to wedding things are expensive u pay for seating and food and all. I could see if she didn't want u at all. kids usually have a drag at these things anyway and u would be chasing a 3 yr old around instead of mingling. i have a 2 yr old and i would be a lil hurt but understanding having planned a wedding myself. u can bring it to her attention and get the full reason if u want.she will probably explain money and space wise to u. but let ur feelings known afterall she is ur friend maybe she can replan things again and let her squeeze back in if u really want her there. i also was wondering are u married or boyfreind.cuz if u single that my be why she invited the lil one to begin with out of courtsey then realized space wise she couldn't and might figured as an adult u might have a better time not haivng to watch out for ur lil one the whole night and even get ur dance on. who knows it is allspeculating here just talk to her hun.good luck
2006-10-30 10:37:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say it was short notice when your child was said to be able to go to the wedding? Seeing as how it's two weeks away, they have seating arrangements planned, and with your child being in under short notice they would have to re-arrange the seating. It is hard to figure out the seating anyway, and trying to do it at the last minute is even harder because there's more stress. It's nothing against your child, they just have a set plan and rearranging the seating is going to be too much for them to handle. Just go, get a baby-sitter, and support your friend. Like I said, it's absolutely NOTHING against your child. People do have the right to invite and uninvite whoever they want, but I don't think it's anything against your child. They just don't want to rearrange the seating.
2006-10-30 12:23:49 · answer #4 · answered by jnhnghgrl7572002 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay...am i the only one in this forum that believes that the bride and groom have every right to invite and un-invite whoever they want? It could be many things. Maybe she doesn't like your kid. Is that maybe because your child can't behave? Seriously, it's not your child's place to ruin anyone's wedding. If she likes your child then it may be a request that the groom made. Either way, showing up with your kid is beyond rude and acting like you have the right to bring your kid everywhere because it's your kid is extremely disrespectful. So please don't take the advice of those who think they are entitled to the world because they know how to make babies. Just ask your friend the real reason and DON'T give her any attitude. It is her wedding after all.
2006-10-30 10:48:37 · answer #5 · answered by cyber_music 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
pay attention, incredibly of pointing out that she might reason problems with the terrific guy's new lady buddy, or that she incredibly replace into not invited, i might try this incredibly: i might call your buddy up and say that the infants of people who invites went out to weren't invited by way of actuality that there may well be too a lot of people to ask in case you invited the infants of all visitors. With that suggested, tell him that his daughter won't be able to come by way of actuality that different visitors on the marriage would be upset understanding that she is the daughter and yet, their own infants might desire to not come. make an apology and say you're sorry and tell him how difficult that is been with invites and who to ask, and the place you may desire to draw the line yet which you are going to have assorted upset people in the event that they see infants of pals coming and their's at the instant are not there!
2016-10-16 13:37:17 · answer #6 · answered by bridgman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
personally i wouldnt go myself. if other people can take their small children then you deserve a better explanation as to why you cant take yours, a three yr old cannot mess up a seating arrangement, maybe she's annoyed it was sprung on her at short notice but even so, its not really friendly is it? i've been to a wedding where kids were banned from every part of it which was fair enough cos it was stated on the invitation but to just tell you yours arnt welcome when others are is just rude. make your excuses and dont go, your loyalty is with your daughter not your flakey friend.
2006-10-30 09:55:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this was my friend (or soon-to-be-ex-friend), I'd confront her with the fact that other small children have been invited, and you feel she owes it to you to tell you the truth about why you've been asked not to bring your child. Are you engaged in a custody battle, where she is afraid of a scene? Is the child abnormal in some way, where she would be unusually disruptive? Is this "friend" actually hoping you will refuse to come, thus eliminating you, rather than your daughter? If so, why? Maybe she's ashamed of the real reason, but she owes it to you to be honest.
2006-10-30 09:52:10 · answer #8 · answered by auntb93again 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she didn't want your three year old at the wedding why invite her?I would go to church or what ever skip reception & bring three year old some where for a treat so she dose not miss out
2006-10-30 22:19:24 · answer #9 · answered by MaryC O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the baby can't go to the reception then don't take him to the wedding or sit down and talk to her about this tell her that you dont like what she's doing and that if she's your real friend then she'll let you bring the child to the reception.
2006-10-30 09:54:25 · answer #10 · answered by pinkprincess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋