(i accidentally deleted the question i just asked, anways)He said he went to a mental hospital a few months ago because he had overdosed or something.. and then i try to see what it is that is bothering him.. and he's like.. oh you dont know and he manages to change the subject.. however i have another friend who talked about being in an abusive relationship and about how her stepdad hit her and stuff.. and this other friend of mine opened up to her while i was there too.. and my friend (the guy who is depresed) was like.. he was molested when he was younger. So anyways, i am desperate because he is moving to his country to try to "find himself" and see if there is a point in living.. however i dont want him to just leave if he is this suicidal (sorry i am just throwing details but i am very desperate and the story is pretty long and detailed) so what can i personally do to make him open up about his problems and get help?
2006-10-30 07:53:52 · 6 answers · asked by sammi 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
he is 20 years old.. and im sure he's a citizen
2006-10-30 08:06:02 · update #1
i try to tell him that if he's depressed here.. its gonna be the same deal over there, but then he doesnt really listen.. oh another strange detail, he told one of my friends when they went to a restaurant to eat, that he was anorexic and he was now recovered, however he didnt order anything and just sat there... anyways.. i never really see him eat, just drink soda sometimes...
2006-10-30 08:14:05 · update #2
What a wonderful friend you are. You are doing all the right things. You are talking to him about it. You are not ignoring his situation which may I say, a lot of people do. All you can do is keep on showing him that you are concerned. A good starter for getting a person to open up is to open up about yourself....tell him something that has happened in your life that made you feel depressed. He may feel closer and more confident in you if he knows you have suffered something "bad" in your life.
Its a horrible situation to see someone you care about suffer like this, but he is the only one who can decide what to do. You are doing everything you possibly can and whatever he decides, you will know you have tried to do everything you can to help him. Its an absolute terrible concept to think that someone you care about may kill himself, but that is the reality. I used to work with street kids and even with all my professional skills, education, compassion and "good advice", some people were just too far gone and were really hell bent on killing themselves. It is a terrible thing to have to come to terms with but the bottom line is that this person has choices and if he is determined to do something then it is his choice. Ring the mental health team in your area, find out what is available, and even if you forced him to get help then it is still no guarantee that it will help him. Sounds to me like he has had a really traumatic life, but even if he has suffered the worst possible abuse, he may just find a way out of his darkness.
Just keep on keeping on, you are doing everything that is right and he certainly knows where to go if he wants good solid support. You are great, but that probably doesnt help your situation because you are still looking on feeling helpless. I have felt that many times and have had to console myself by saying I am doing everything humanly possible to help and no-one can ask for more....and ultimately he does have choices. Maybe you could point that out to him. Tell him, you understand he has the right to choose, but you would hate to see him kill himself because he doesnt know what is around the corner. Things never stay the same, but if he kills himself there will never be any chance of him knowing a better life. Tell him that. Its Ok to use the words suicide and death and kill....it shows you have a true understanding of what he is going through. Discuss death with him, he may feel the need to discuss his fears/desires about death. Just be open to anything he wants to talk to you about. Listen more than anything...he probably doesnt want advice. Just be there, that is the best thing you can do.
Wow I wish I had a friend like you...he is very lucky.
2006-10-30 08:45:32 · answer #1 · answered by rightio 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Say you are worried about him, and ask if he has a suicide plan. I know that if they have a plan, they're usually more serious about it. Call a mental health center (try calling the health dept) and ask what the criteria are for involuntary commitment (if he does not agree to talk to somebody); explain the situation and ask what you should do. I'm sorry I don't have the exact answer, but I hope you can find someone who does.
If you think he's in immediate danger, obviously call 911.
I guess it also depends how old he is. I'm assuming he's over 18 and is in the USA right now.
2006-10-30 08:02:18 · answer #2 · answered by sarcastro1976 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-26 19:44:03 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he could get the proper medication it would go a long way towards lifting his depression. Then he needs to get in with a counselor who can help him with his grief about the molestation.
If there is any way you can stop him from leaving the country before he's treated, please do it.
2006-10-30 08:09:45 · answer #4 · answered by Ellen J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak to his parents or persuade him to seek out professional help and get on medication..Best of luck.
2006-10-30 08:01:33 · answer #5 · answered by carasmom 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
don't worry. he'll get back up soon. tell him to forget the past. i don't think he's going to kill himself. well GOD bless him.
same thing happened to me. my friend tried to help me out. but it never worked. i got right back up later on, on my own. i thank my friend for helping anyway.
2006-10-30 08:03:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋