Question for parents who smoked pot in the 60's + 70's.?

Question

Ok everybody has done things as teens and young adults that may not have been the best idea in hindsight but how do you handle the drug situation now if you have a young adult who is drinking illegally, occasionally alone, and possibly stealing it from work and smoking pot in the house when they think no one is paying attention and possibly other drugs? Works very part time and takes a few college classes but doesn't wake up in time to get there sometimes.

Do you back off and hope it's just a faze or do you take action and if so to what length? I ask because my significant other is going through this will their 19 year old and it is causing chaos in our house. There is also a 15 year old and 14 year old to consider.

He also tends to lie or say it's none of your business if you ask anything like where he is off to or details to a particular incident

Answer 1

You intercede.

i would go into the room and sweep it clean,
disposing of all pot.

naturally, he will squeal, so you lay down the rules

19 or not, as long as he remains in the house, he abides by the laws of the house.

For the time being, remove all alcohol from the house. Advise him of random searches to determine whether or not he is backsliding.

This will do one of two things: he will straighten up or he will move out.

It's harsh, but life would be far harsher

Answer 2

As soon as my children started middle school,I told them, that as a teen, I had smoked pot a few times, I didn't like it. It made me feel paranoid,[ which was true ]. I then informed them that I knew all the signs, of a pot smoker , They would not have a chance of getting away with it. I also told them a bout a former friend, who had once been smart, fun to hang with, but after he got into pot big time. His personality changed. He became lazy, boring, and dull. I felt sorry for him. He just turned into a nothing slacker. I don't think this just a faze, The 2 of you need to take action, Tell him if he lives under your roof, everthing is your business. At 19 he should either be in school full time, or work full time. A little of each leads to nothing.

Answer 3

speaking as a parent that did all that when i was young. and now have 2 teens of my own. there is no way in h*** that i would think of it as just a faze and ignore it. i would be telling them that they need to get their act together, and abide by the rules of the home or get out. now if you allow this to go on, the 15 and 14 year old are going to see this and think well he gets away with it, so??? come on its called tough love, do it now before its to late. have you ever seen those programs where the parents thought it was a faze and now the kid is dead from drug overdose? drugs are alot stronger now then they were then. and alot easier to get. put an end to it now.

Answer 4

At 19, he needs more responsibility. Ask him to help with the household expenses, not as a punishment, but adult to adult. It doesn't sound like he's doing these things for fun, it doesn't seem like a phase. If he's not meeting his responsibilities, he's making a poor example for the other. How you handle this is also setting a poor example, because then it will seem like no big deal. You both need to put a stop to it, with out running him off or pushing him away.

Answer 5

You cannot take any chances with the younger children around. He's old enough to make it on his own. Kick him out, NOW.

Answer 6

for his sake as well as the rest of your family you have to make him stop. clean his room throw out everything illegal which includes alcohol he's uderage. I threated my son over and over but didn't make him stop. Now the worst has happened and he may go to prison. get your son help before it is to late.

Answer 7

Make him move out and experience the real world. Once he realizes it is hard to be a loser and still pay rent, he will have to consider his options.

Answer 8

you have to put a stop to this behaviour right now