Met this sxy single mum online some months ago. She has a little girl, and thankfully her ex is no longer on the scene. We are both in our late 20s, lead busy lives, live quite far apart (50 miles) and as a result, haven’t found the time to meet, but chat often by txt and phone, and swapped photos. What I love about this girl is that she’s grounded and wants to be protected and loved. I find these to be very attractive traits. She also seems very keen on me, even though we have never met before, …which kinda scares me lol :/
What is clear however is that our outlooks are quite dissimilar. She wants to settle down with someone, yet I know in myself that I don’t just yet, never mind feeling emotionally ready for a ready-made family scenario. This may change with time of course, or if things progress slowly, but am I being fair to her? I dont have kids myself and am independent by nature, plus never really considered taking on someone else’s child.
So, do I go ahead and meet her, see what happens, or end the whole thing gently and explain that’s its for the best that we move on?
2006-10-30 00:27:26 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
as long as you make your feelings perfectly clear to her then the ball is in her court - she can either continue the friendship or go in search for a mate elsewhere if that's her overriding priority
2006-10-30 00:33:22 · answer #1 · answered by silly billy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From my point of view, I would tell her exactly how you feel just as you did in your question. Then leave it up to her to decide if she would still like to meet and get to know one another better. It may or may not lead to a forever love relationship but it could possible lead to a good friend. Let her decide if she would like to take it very slow, possibly even date others too until the two of you figure out if there's a chance for a serious relationship. What do you have to lose..... nothing... but possibly lots to gain, and if it's her decision to proceed on slowly then I feel you are being fair to her. Just don't lead her on! Good luck!
2006-10-30 08:37:45 · answer #2 · answered by looking for answers 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make it crystal clear to her, how you feel...then, if she's kewl with that and still wants to meet you, what's the harm? You said yourself you live 50 miles apart so it's not like the relationship could move TOO fast, because you won't be able to see one another as often as if you lived in the same town...
However, if she feels she needs more right now, than you feel you are ready for, you can move on and not wonder if you missed out on something...
2006-10-30 08:30:45 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i kind of can relate to this, u may think that ur not ready to settle down just yet. But, u may first want to get to know her and her child, every thing happens for a reason and this might be to help you settle down and start a family of yor own. Get to kow her, and then choose to settle down, or not
2006-10-30 08:32:12 · answer #4 · answered by Ragnarock 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well i would arrange to meet her, when you meet her than you can always talk what about what you want at a later date.
When you first meet someone you don't always take it for granted that you are going to last forever,
If you like this girl what have you got to loose, it is something that if you don't than you could always think why didn't i?
go for it and good luck
2006-10-30 08:31:34 · answer #5 · answered by blondegirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
all 100% of women want to settle down with smth suitable. if they say they don't that means u re either not suitable material for settling down or they re lying, trying not to scare u in advance. so i say even if u won't meet with that one and will find another one this other one would want to settle down too. so what's the difference? i say go and meet. u will see according the situation. just meeting with someone doesn't obligate u to marry this someone
2006-10-30 08:44:10 · answer #6 · answered by jacky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you KNOW that you both are not looking for the same things in life right now, I don't see the point in continuing. She is going to continue to fall deeper for you and want you to commit to her and you will start backing off because your not ready for the commitment or the ready made family. Why put yourselves through it?
2006-10-30 08:30:53 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you sure do ask a lot of questions about women don't u.... anyway.... my advice is not to meet her in person.... u get on over the net which many of us do, a little escape from reality... u can be fun and flirty with out being tied down... but u can keep talking to her, u dont have to drop her out all together.... ur not ready to meet her and believe it or not she might not be ready to meet u, sometimes curiosity gets the better of us... relax... tell her it's good to have a FRIEND like her to speak to.... drop friend in a few times and carry on with the friendship, your meant to enjoy things like this not worry over them.... good luck
2006-10-30 08:41:51 · answer #8 · answered by thenickistar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is ready to settle down but you are not, then don't waste her time. By not starting anything that you won't see through, you can save both of you a lot of heartache.
2006-10-30 08:31:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should totally meet her. like you said by a certain time you will be ready to take on the big responisbility of her and her child. and you won't wind up regretting it in the long run. you'll never know she could have been 'the one'.
2006-10-30 08:31:25 · answer #10 · answered by Maria 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋