My boyfriend is a recovering alcoholic and drug addict who recently fell off the wagon due to some medical problems.I am not only worried about this but he told me tonight that I lie to him when I say I love him and he is not worth loving. He told me he just wants to "suck on a bullet". I love him so much and want the old him back. What can I do to help him? If I call the police and say he is suicidal will they take him to a hospital or does he have to consent to that b/c he won't (I already tried). Please help me! Serious answers only. This is no joking matter to me.
2006-10-29 14:29:41 · 10 answers · asked by Ron's wife 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
We live in NJ and I am pretty sure in this state that if you don't consent to treatment yourself you will not get it. If you are from Jersey and can help it would be much appreciated!
2006-10-30 02:20:15 · update #1
THIS IS VERY HARD THERE IS NOT A WHOLE LOT YOU CAN DO WHEN SOMEONE=E IS THAT DEPRESSED THEY HAVE TO WANT TO HELP THEMSELVES I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL I HAVE GONE THROUGH A VERY HARD TIME WITH MY OWN DAUGHTER AND THE POLICE AND HOSPITAL DONT HELP ALL YOU DO IS GET THE RUN AROUND AND ALSO ARE EMOTIONALLY DRAINED YOURSELF DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP OVER THIS ALL YOU CAN DO IS LET HIM KNOW YOU ARE THERE FOR HIM IM SURE YOU DO LOVE HIM AND HE DOES NOT SEE THAT HE NEEDS TO WANT TO GET HELP ESPECIALLY IF HE IS OVER 18 THERE ISNT A WHOLE LOT YOU CAN DO BUT ENCOURAGE HIM TO GET COUNSELING GOOD LUCK MY HEART ACHES FOR YOU I CAN FEEL YOUR PAIN
2006-10-29 14:37:23 · answer #1 · answered by tristy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can call an ambulance and have him evaluated by a psychiatrist at the ER. You could phone the police and ask if they would take him to hospital. You could call the central office number for AA or NA, or call someone from the program that he knows. If he has a decent relationship with a family member you might call them. And you need to be clear with him and yourself, that making some phone calls is your part in this, and accepting the help is his part. Ultimately if he kills himself or not, that decisions rests with him only, and you have no responsibility in that decision.
2006-10-29 15:19:18 · answer #2 · answered by sushi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately this is all too familiar scenerio concerning recovering addicts. There are no easy answers. but you have got to know that whatever happens, it is not because of what you may or may not have done. The inner feelings of self-worthlessness are often times multiplied by the long term dependency upon drugs, etc. To save your boyfriend at this point may not be possible, however, go to him express your true feelings, then let him make the decision to accept help or not. If he chooses not to receive help, it's time to move on and get your life back.
2006-10-29 14:51:55 · answer #3 · answered by rexallen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is only so much you can do when somebody you love and care about is depressed. It's not your responsibility to make him happy. That's a lot of pressure to be putting on you. And it's unfair of him to blame you. Do your best to convince him that you love him and will be there for him, but if this really starts to bring you down as well, you really need to take a step back and figure out if this is the path you want to go down. Maybe he needs to see a therapist.
2016-05-22 06:34:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A while back, I was feeling more depressed than I had ever felt before. I reached out to some one for help and they refused. I told that person that I might as well just kill myself then, and I hung up the phone. I got pretty buzzed on beer and weed and crashed out on my couch. A while later, there was a loud knock on my door. It was the police. The person who had refused to help me, called them, fearing I was going to kill myself. I opened the door and they told me they had been called to check on me. They basically talked me into going with them to the police station where I was later transfered by ambulence to a mental health facility for observation.I was led into the lobby/waiting room. I was told I could sleep in one of the beds if I wanted or just hang out int the waiting room. The bedroom was one big room with several beds. There was a scary looking guy sleeping in one of the beds already. I decided to stay in the lobby! I was there for about twelve hours. When I was able to show them that I wasn't a risk to myself or others, I was released. Then I had to ride a bus 50 miles to get back home. It sure felt good to get home. The point of this long story is that it kind of woke me up and made me realize that life is too short to feel depressed all the time. I made myself look at all the good things I have in my life and I had to admit that I'm a pretty lucky guy. It worked for me. I can't say that it would work for him because I don't know him. You do. Please call some one before it's too late.
Your boyfriend is way luckier than he knows. He has you!
2006-10-29 15:15:01 · answer #5 · answered by jare bare 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should keep an eye on him. Keep telling him that you love him and want to help him. He probably feels like you are lying cause of his problem. Hes probably thinking who could love an addict like me. He has a low low self esteem.But remember that its the drugs and alcohol that have him right now. He needs help and you need to do what ever you need to to make sure he gets it. He needs to be in a hospital. Just be there for him. Good Luck
2006-10-29 14:38:08 · answer #6 · answered by Baby boy blue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been where you boyfriend is right now and he needs help immediatley, he will not seek help for himself so you have to do it for him. Call the police and tell them he is suicidal and will not go to the hospital willingly, they do not need his consent to take him to the hospital, and they will take him whether he likes it or not.
Please get help for him before it's too late. Good luck, I sincerely hope he gets better.
2006-10-29 14:43:56 · answer #7 · answered by li li 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call 911!!!! Right now!!! If you go to the hospital with him, and tell them he's having suicidal thoughts, they'll admit him, even against his consent. They will help him. Do this right now! Don't wait! God bless you both, I'll pray for you.
2006-10-29 14:38:35 · answer #8 · answered by qtrn2005 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call 911 immediately!!!!! You can sign him in because he's unstable right now. He can't leave until the Doctors feel he's ready, and he DOES NOT have to consent to anything!! Good Luck
2006-10-29 16:01:45 · answer #9 · answered by sandnickel2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the AA group where he used to go, and ask a couple of members to come to talk to him now. He needs to go to a meeting.
2006-10-29 14:55:15 · answer #10 · answered by Buffy Summers 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋